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    peter89's Avatar
    peter89 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 22, 2008, 06:25 PM
    My girl is mad on me, don't want to talk
    Hi guys, few days ago I screamed on my girlfriend. She got really mad and upset. We have been together over a 1 year. She didn't pick up her phone for few days, finally I got talk to her when I went to her house. She want me to show her that I grew up and changed.
    How can I show this to her? (I'm 18).

    I love her so much, she's a wonderful woman and I don't want to loose her.

    I miss her and I don't know what to do.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #2

    Nov 22, 2008, 06:28 PM

    Just stop yelling. Show her that you can be mature. Mature people, in a mature relationship, don't yell whenever they have a problem, they sit down and talk about it rationally.

    Tell her you're sorry, she'll either forgive you and give you another chance, or kick you to the curb. It's her call.

    Good luck.
    peter89's Avatar
    peter89 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Nov 22, 2008, 06:32 PM

    I yelled at her maybe 2 times in the whole relationship. I never said bad word to her, because I love her so much.

    I apologized to her today, I gave her a flowers but she said that I think flowers will make her forget.

    I feel so bad now, I started crying and maybe this is why she said that I need to grow up.
    xxariesxx's Avatar
    xxariesxx Posts: 202, Reputation: 40
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    #4

    Nov 22, 2008, 06:38 PM
    I guess I think maybe she is being a little harsh on you, especially after what you stated in your last post.

    There's only so many times you can ask for forgiveness before it becomes ridiculous. I don't think you need to "grow up" because you cried; that, if anything, shows how sorry you really are.

    You told her you were sorry and it would not happen again, gave her flowers... just leave her be for a bit to cool off and do your own thing while she thinks.
    TrueFaith's Avatar
    TrueFaith Posts: 1,202, Reputation: 313
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    #5

    Nov 22, 2008, 06:45 PM

    Just because you are 18 does not mean you can scream at everyone

    Learn some self control..

    Best way.. to have a fight.. Is not have a fight!

    If something really gets to you..
    And this is hard I know..

    Say.. Ok I'm going to come back and talk to you about this. And leave and cool off. Come back with a clean head.

    She has put you in the Dog house.. I think it has gone on to long.. so you go to her and you say this

    ( Look I have said sorry more than once. It is not fair on you always making me regret this. Yes I screwed up but can we move on please?)

    And let that be the end of it. If she is still mad at you then don't talk to her. Because you don't want someone hanging this over your head all the time.
    And she sounds like someone that will do just that.. it is a control thing. So the more hurt you feel. The more power she feels.


    Being matuer is also knowing how to forgive!

    Yeah what you did was wrong. But she is taking this a bit to far..
    So lay down the rules.
    Stand up for yourself.
    And that's it

    You have said sorry.
    If she still wants to be mad with you let her
    But don't walk around with a hurt puppy look about you.

    Get on with your life
    And if she rings cool
    If not then.. if I a relationship dies because of that..

    Then it never was much of a relationship to start with.
    peter89's Avatar
    peter89 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Nov 22, 2008, 06:51 PM

    Now, she thinks I don't love her. She doesn't believe me anymore after I screamed on her.

    It hurts bad, but I got lesson.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #7

    Nov 22, 2008, 07:03 PM

    She is playing with you then. If you're sincere when you apologize, then you should be forgiven. This may be her way of breaking up with you.

    Also, flowers don't work, really, they don't. If I'm mad at hubby and he brings me flowers and thinks I'll just forgive and forget, no, not if he's not really sorry.

    Flowers are a nice gesture, but I'd rather get flowers just because, not because I'm mad.

    Like True Faith said, if she calls, she calls, if not, move on, like I said before, there are plenty of fish in the sea. Happy fishing. :)
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #8

    Nov 22, 2008, 07:19 PM

    I hope your learning that acting badly and treating someone badly, has its consequences, and sometimes "I am sorry" isn't enough.

    Leave her alone, and let her cool off, and see if she is willing to talk. If not, learn to control yourself, and your temper, for the next girl.
    peter89's Avatar
    peter89 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Nov 22, 2008, 08:22 PM
    I'm just trying to figure out how to show her that I grew up.
    High Max's Avatar
    High Max Posts: 271, Reputation: 43
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    #10

    Nov 23, 2008, 05:31 AM

    Why don't you explain first WHY you were yelling at her? Was it justified?
    peter89's Avatar
    peter89 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Nov 23, 2008, 06:57 AM
    I drove like 30 miles to other town to see her at place she works, and she could not talk because it was busy. Later, she called me and I yelled at her.

    It wasn't smart at all. Sometimes I'm just emotional and she said that I need to control myself.
    High Max's Avatar
    High Max Posts: 271, Reputation: 43
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    #12

    Nov 23, 2008, 07:06 AM

    I think you both overreacted a little bit and that she should just get over it. Don't beg or appologize anymore, it isn't like you've cheated on her or flirted with other women.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #13

    Nov 23, 2008, 08:21 AM

    It wasn't smart at all. Sometimes I'm just emotional and she said that I need to control myself.
    Leave her alone, and learn to control yourself. Nobody likes to be screamed at.

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