After I made the last post about my daughter I have decided to sent her this letter, because any attempt of us talking to her results in her silence:

"I think and I feel that things have become unbearable just as much for you as they are for us.

You come home, sometimes, not all the times say "boo" or maybe not even that, when you talk to us you talk about "old folks" "pensioners" and so on, in short never have anything nice to say, in fact you have quit communicating with us all together.

We have not even been good enough to tell us that you are planning to get married next year and share the joy with you. I take it harder then dad does, but I think even he notices and it is sad. I watched you the other day, when he came to tell you something into your room, your back was to him and you were making faces as he was talking to you. I am not stupid as you might think, one day when I was trying to give you hug in your room and I saw you make disgusting face and at that moment my heart broke down. Think of it what you want.....I ended up crying half of the night. That is neither here nor there.... mother's love is blind and it always will be, but I need to tell you all this. On the other hand I am not going to be stuck in love and relationship that hurts. We have every right to be treated with "RESPECT" and that is something you don't have for us. It seems that you are enjoying abusing us emotionally.

In case you don't know what respect is here are some answers:
We are ignored
We feel rejected
We are not listened to
We are not asked for our opinions
We are interrupted
We are laughed at
Nothing we say is taking seriously
Our feelings are not ackowledged
Our ideas are not taken seriously
Our needs are not acknowledged
and not taken seriously
Our questions are not taken seriouslyin fact we cannot ask questions
Our questions are not answered or
are evaded
We are told that we wouldn't be able to
to understand something
We are not asked for our ideas
We are not asked how we feel
Our way of doing things is not accepted
We feel betrayed

Does father deserve cold shoulder and silent treatment all the time? "NO" and as a matter of fact neither do I. He had every right when he got mad this morning., and you know that it takes him long time to get mad. You are walking all over us and made us prisoners in our home as well. We are affraid to turn the TV louder for fear of more insults "as you old people can't hear". I am affraid to ask you something in case you are in bad mood and you chew my head off. Is that any kind of life for anybody? "NO"! Can you tell me, since the communication seems to be so important to you everywhere else, what have we done to deserve this kind of treatment from you? We don't get to choose our parents, as we don't get to choose our kids, but one thing I know is that you do not love neither of us. Just think about that one day later in life, you will be where we are now and you will feel what we feel today and it won't be pleasant!

Dad and I worked hard all of our lives and did not have it easy and we deserve break at our age. We don't have many years to live, until now it was a rat race for survival and to make things better for all of us. It's time to start being selfish and look after ourselves, because one thing I know for sure in my heart, you would not move a finger for neither of us. You have lots of benefits from living with us. It wouldn't kill you too show some appreciation and gratitude, give something back in return. You should be interested in sharing your life with us. Sometimes you could offer to clean the house, or cook in return. But that is never going to happen.
It is enormously sad, but true, you have to learn that in life you can't walk all over people that love you the most and be kind to strangers, that will never work in the relationship with us or with your future husband.

louie1

i find it sad that your daughter has you so angry with her. she seems selfish and nonunderstanding of yours and your husbands love for her and indeed needs in your life. i like your letter and know that if that was from my mum it would certainly hit a few nerves, i would hand it to her and ask her to leave she has a new life to go onto and will not appreciate what you have done until she has to stand on her own to feet. I adore my parents and they i and i do not understand why children behave in this way i am one of five and the younger two of our clan are very similar to your daughter sounds to me like you have given her to much in her life and she has taken it all for granted sadly losing all respect along the way. Break free and whilst it might hurt for a while when your daughter does come back into your lives she will be the adorable little;e girl you once held she just needs to realise it all for herself you and your husband do not deserve to be treated this way and pound to a penny any ailments you are currently suffering will disappear as the stress is removed take care!