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My ex and i dated for about 3 and a half years, we met in high school and dated through our sophomore years of college, i treated her as best as i could, i took her out, i never raised my voice at her or cussed at her, i never cheated on her, im ambitious and those were all qualities that she liked so i was very secure as her boyfriend, she was a very good girlfriend, she was also ambitious, she's gorgeous, and she was very very loyal and faithful
about 3 weeks ago we broke up, it was mutual, we just wanted to be single and go as individuals and if it was meant to be, later on we'd get back together. we were both very sad, and at first i tried to get her to call it off, but she told me that she wanted to go through with it, so i left her alone, all of this happened over facebook chat because she was too upset to talk to me over the phone
so for the past 3 weeks i;ve been giving her the space that she asked for, i;ve been working on improving myself, i started teaching myself the keyboard(sorta) i've been in the gym, and ive been keeping up wiht my classes, during this time i spent hours researching the best way to get your ex back
eventually i came up with a plan to get her back, after a few more weeks i was going to try and start as friends and build up from there
but yesterday i received a fatal blow when i looked on her facebook page and saw that she was in a relationship with another guy. i was so shocked because she never ever gave a guy another look while we were dating, and i didnt think she d get snap out of it that quickly. while i dont know the new guy, hes not very attractive according to all of her friends and we're exact opposites, basically he's opposite of everything she told me she liked
i asked her about it and i asked her how she could move on so quikcly and she said she was still in love with me and would never get over me but she was trying to move on, as much as it hurt me, i was so nice to her, and wished her well
now i'm lost, todya she put pictures of her up sleepign with the first present that i ever got her, a stuffed bear, thats very symbolic to her, and she still wears the necklace i gave her, i know she misses me, but idk what to think of this new relationship, is it a rebound? is she missing the attention i gave her, and should i wait for her, i love her so much, more than anything, and i know most people would say move on, but im so stuck on this girl that i cant see myself dating anyone else, i know im still young (20) but im in a terrible place right now, i want to know whether i should continue to live my life, and hope that this relationship fails, or should i try and block her out all the way
Sorry but its time to move on. Her words dont match her actions. Read the advice in the stickies at the top of the page.
You say this was a mutual decision and she s acted on it.
I m sorry for what has happened to you. I can say this , we have all been through this. You think she needs space to figure things out but the fact of the matter is she probably was thinking sbout breaking it off for a long time but she stayed with you to make it easier for herself (this is exactly what happened to me).
I understand what you are feeling, betrayed hurt, you cannot comprehend how they move on so fast. What you need to do is you need to stop contact right away, chances are she is using him to get over you (rebound), you need to show her what she doesnt have anymore and cut contact. This will also make it easier for you to move on as she is trying to do.
Now i know you are thinking i want her back and all but you said that it was mitual and we both broke it off, maybe now you just want her back because someone else is involve. My best advice would be not to get involve in her business (facebook, friends, family) , do not contact her and work on yourself. Who knows what will happen to you.
Believe me when i tell you that you will find that special someone, in fact if you read peoples threads you always notice something common, everyone thinks and believe that the person they are referring to is the best person in the world for them and there are no other. They say this because of the vulnerable state they are in (something to think about)
Wish you all the best
I m sorry for what has happened to you. I can say this , we have all been through this. You think she needs space to figure things out but the fact of the matter is she probably was thinking sbout breaking it off for a long time but she stayed with you to make it easier for herself (this is exactly what happened to me).
I understand what you are feeling, betrayed hurt, you cannot comprehend how they move on so fast. What you need to do is you need to stop contact right away, chances are she is using him to get over you (rebound), you need to show her what she doesnt have anymore and cut contact. This will also make it easier for you to move on as she is trying to do.
Now i know you are thinking i want her back and all but you said that it was mitual and we both broke it off, maybe now you just want her back because someone else is involve. My best advice would be not to get involve in her business (facebook, friends, family) , do not contact her and work on yourself. Who knows what will happen to you.
Believe me when i tell you that you will find that special someone, in fact if you read peoples threads you always notice something common, everyone thinks and believe that the person they are referring to is the best person in the world for them and there are no other. They say this because of the vulnerable state they are in (something to think about)
Wish you all the best
thanks for your input, it definitely sucks, and i know itll get better, but ive heard that a rebound relationship may end up leading us back together because she'll realize what she's missing, idk, maybe not
I do agree with everyone that "her actions do not match her words". But women are complex and so are their thoughts, feelings and actions. She may need to validate her feelings. She may be feeling too attached at such a young age. She may simply want to experience more before she commits and is not ready for commitment.
You two where together at 18 I presume...3 years, its all going great and you worship the ground she walks on. You sound very sweet and a "true" gentlemen which is very rare these days in your generation. Just concentrate on yourself and remember, that if something is special and wonderful, and you let it go, just to see if it comes back to you, and it does, you can keep it. If something is not well then it is time to move on. She evidently moved on, maybe you should try to have some fun too...try to see other people, you may find that your interests have changed. Giving her, her space is good, I don't think you should cut her off, remove her from your life, maybe you could be friends...keep your connection to her, maybe when your ready to move on she will change her mind? You never know! But, my boyfriend always pursued me - even when I broke up with him (numerous times) and everytime he so desperately came to get me, I knew he loved me and so we married. So, you will have to do what you feel you need to do. Worst case scenario, you move on.
One man to another, you do as she does. She moved beyond the relationship, and is doing her thing, which is exactly what you should be doing. Your thing.
Yeah it sucks in the feelings department, but being busy with family, friends, and school will keep you busy as you heal in time.
The key is leaving her alone, and staying off her facebook. Those two things will keep you stuck, confused, and hurting, for your loss. You need new happy memories, to replace the old ones, and that just takes time.
You're probably giving yourself false hope. What you need now is to block her completely or you won't be able to move on. Read the stickies and I guess you know what you need to do. You attracted her so you will be able to attract other people.
You're probably giving yourself false hope. What you need now is to block her completely or you won't be able to move on. Read the stickies and I guess you know what you need to do. You attracted her so you will be able to attract other people.
idk if its false hope our not because she's clearly in a rebound relationship. it hurts, but if she realizes what she has in me then she'll come back, if not then it wasnt meant to be, but a few of my friends have gone through similar situations and sometimes it turned out good, other times it did not.
It usually never works to go back with an ex, trust me. It's much easier to find someone else and start something new. Beside, if she went with another guy you probably won't see her the same after that. Don't give yourself false hope and move on, she is doing it, why not you?
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