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    bijiou36's Avatar
    bijiou36 Posts: 117, Reputation: 0
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    #1

    Aug 2, 2010, 01:36 PM
    I Don't think I'm enough for my boyfriend?
    Me & My Boyfriend have Been together for 10 months going on 11, & we're having problems like: Well 1. He Watches Porn & it makes me feel like I'm not enough for him like he looks at better looking girls in the porn because I'm not enough?? I asked before & he got upset like mad and said it's not true and he said he wouldn't watch it anymore but I know he still does even his friends told me... & he almost cheated a few weeks ago... so I feel like he wants more! I mean I'm really uncomfortable with my body but he told me I'm beautiful.. I have blue eyes D's pretty much a 'fit' body. But I'm still uncomfortable with it. I just feel like he watches porn because he likes what he sees more in the girls on there than me... & also we have different sex drives, I want to have sex more than he does, we already talked about that but he said we'll do it a couple times a month so that I can get used to it and I agreed but I just told him what he wanted to hear. I really don't agree much with that cause I really want it more than that & he won't let me masturbate because he says that if a girl masturbates she'll get loose and he's doing this P90X thing to get more muscular because he thinks he's not but that all started because he found a picture in a old jacket I had of me & my Ex and my Ex was like the body builder type body & I think he got jealous? I really don't know but he hasn't been paying much attention to me because of it & I don't know what to do about all 3 problems..
    Help?
    bijiou36's Avatar
    bijiou36 Posts: 117, Reputation: 0
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    #2

    Aug 2, 2010, 02:09 PM

    okay thanks so much but do u think I can get him to stop watchinqq it? Because in his room when I go to his house he has a lot of posters of half naked girls and that really bothers me more =/
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
     
    #3

    Aug 2, 2010, 02:15 PM

    He can masturbate but you can't? What happened to equality? (No, masturbation does not make a vagina loose. Geez!)

    Looking at porn is a passive activity, easy, a lazy man's thing to do. A person only has to react; he doesn't have to relate to anybody in any way. Real sex is for real men (and real women) who are willing to work on a relationship and make it a good one.

    Masturbation shouldn't be done so often that real-life relationships are ignored or lost.

    Get past the preoccupation with the body and find ways to connect with each other's soul and heart. Once that happens, all the physical stuff will fall into place.
    slapshot_oi's Avatar
    slapshot_oi Posts: 1,537, Reputation: 589
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    #4

    Aug 2, 2010, 02:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by bijiou36 View Post
    . . . i mean im really uncomfortable with my body. . . i have blue eyes DD's pretty muuch a 'fit' body. but im still uncomfortable with it.?
    This is the problem.

    You've expressed this to him with your dislike of porn, whether you told him outright or not. So, instead of supporting you like he should, he goes the opposite direction and exploits it.

    I would focus on yourself and try to see yourself in better light so you aren't so uncomfortable with your body.
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #5

    Aug 8, 2010, 12:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by bijiou36 View Post
    okay thanks soo much but do u think i can get him to stop watchinqq it? because in his room when i go to his house he has alot of posters of half naked girls and that really bothers me more =/
    Could I ask what age your boyfriend is?

    Posters on his bedroom wall of half naked girls?

    Does not sound like a man,more like a teenager.

    Could we wait for an answer before we give any more information on porn etc.

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/womens...lf-496137.html

    Post 5 here is a concern for age.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #6

    Aug 8, 2010, 12:14 PM

    Yes he is certainly not a man, regardless of his age.

    Many men look at porn, they have the issue when they forget that is not real life and often they don't want real sex if they masterbate too much, since they get used to the "feel" of their hand and nothing else is the same. So at this point it is his issue.

    Next sounds like he is just uneducated on sex, no you masterbating does not make you loose ( OK really is he 15 or something)
    Sounds like he is trying to control you and you are allowing it
    lickemlolly's Avatar
    lickemlolly Posts: 397, Reputation: 62
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    #7

    Aug 8, 2010, 12:31 PM
    I have to agree with the previous post... its OK for you to masturbate but not for him to watch porn... realize that majority of men watch porn whether their significant other knows about it or not... I think you are being a bit insecure thinking he watches it because he finds the women in there more attractive... why do you want him to stop watching it so badly? He's not sleeping with the girls in the videos... this is a NORM... now about the masturbating thing.. have you explained to him that masturbation does not make you loose and that the difference in sexual desire creates your NEED to masturbate?
    bijiou36's Avatar
    bijiou36 Posts: 117, Reputation: 0
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    #8

    Aug 8, 2010, 03:10 PM

    Well yeea we're teens but I don't think age matters which is why I didn't put my age on here because I figured people wouldn't take my questions seriously
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #9

    Aug 8, 2010, 07:57 PM

    Your age is important, as you, and your boyfriend are experimenting with adult stuff, and your both inexperienced, and insecure with yourselves, and your knowledge of adult matters is so limited, and it says a lot when you do what he says about masturbation, for such a ridiculous reason.

    Straight talk for any teen is to have the facts about such adult things as sex, BEFORE you go having fun with it, because the consequences of ignorance is life changing, from pregnancy to disease. And do you know how bad a stubble feels? Obviously not.

    You have no control what he watches, or why, or what he does when he watches it, and if your insecure over that fact, then your missing the real issues that affect you, and that's your own self esteem, if your so threatened by images on a movie.

    You have a lot to learn, and you better start with learning, and dealing with yourself, and your own feelings, or you will never understand the feelings of another, and your preoccupation with sex, while normal for your age, cannot be a substitute for you feeling good about yourself, or not having the facts about sex, so some guy you like can't tell you any made up dumb stuff, like this fellow does.

    Sex starts in the brain, NOT between your legs. And there are many other ways to show love besides with your bodies. Love is NOT all about sex, though it feels good and fools most into thinking it has to be love. To you maybe it is love, but when your knowledge and experienced is limited, get some real facts first, so you can at least be responsible.

    This isn't about what he does or says, but about what YOU do about yourself. Yes we take all questions seriously, too bad you don't do the same with the advice that your given. My advice to you, stop having sex until you know a lot more about it, and yourself.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
    Pets Expert
     
    #10

    Aug 14, 2010, 01:05 AM

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...lk-497983.html

    OP is 15.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #11

    Aug 14, 2010, 11:00 AM

    First off you are too young to be this involved with this boy who is also too young to be this involved.

    Now anytime you are with a guy who feels he has every right to watch porn and do what ever he wants, yet tells you that you can't masturbate, or he'll only have sex with you every once in a while, that is a sure sign that he is controlling and selfish.
    But in this case he is just young and stupid and you are thinking with your vagina and a 15 year old brain.
    Both of you need to chill far away from each other.
    Shaydie's Avatar
    Shaydie Posts: 30, Reputation: 3
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    #12

    Aug 17, 2010, 01:46 PM

    HE sounds really pig headed and uneducated. You sound like you are willing to believe anything. Take control of your life and do some research into the facts. An obsession with porn means he may not be a good mate in the future. Do you really want to be with a man that doesn't make you feel beautiful? I have gained and lost so much weight in the 12 years that I have been married. Never one time has my husband ever made me feel anything but beautiful. Have standards for yourself.
    bloody_micmac's Avatar
    bloody_micmac Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Nov 4, 2012, 08:54 PM
    Lol

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