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I desperately want my ex back

Asked Jan 1, 2012, 04:58 PM — 22 Answers
I have been with this guy for 5 years, he lives in Tennessee and I live in Florida. We agreed to visit each other every month, or two. Things were going perfect. I am truthful to him, and he tells me everything. I can call him at his work, talk to his boss, and everything. Since June of this last year (2011), he's not the same, he don't call like he used to, he don't text back like he used to, he just changed, and started telling me "you were too good to me I ****ed everything up".

Dont know why he told me that, but I thought he was cheating on me, still think he's cheating, his boss told me his dating somebody, when I ask him he told me she's just a friend it doesn't mean anything. I love him with all my heart, and soul, he told me to find somebody better than him. I don't know what to do to get him back, please help

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22 Answers
talaniman's Avatar
talaniman Posts: 44,336, Reputation: 50356
Senior Family & People Expert
  
#21

Apr 22, 2012, 08:57 PM


Don't get carried away. One date is hardly a fulfilling long term relationship. dating is for having fun getting to know a stranger. Not getting ready for love forever. Can't you enjoy yourself without getting all hung up on past issues?

Can't you just have fun without beating yourself up? Or latching on to a guy who you don't know? If you can't relax, and just enjoy dating and having fun, then you are not ready to date yet. Or maybe you shouldn't commit to dating just one guy, and becoming dependent on his romantic attention.

Hard to move forward and have fun when you still have old bags from the past pulling you back. Having a lack of confidence now is baggage from the past, so let it go!
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JudyKayTee's Avatar
JudyKayTee Posts: 45,370, Reputation: 23523
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#22

Apr 23, 2012, 04:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by slaibie View Post
Its been 5 months since my break up,well i guess i finally realize i lost him for real,it hurts but i always make sure i have a smile on my face everyday .I recently met a guy he is really nice,loving and caring i think we both are attracted to each other,we went on our first date last week it was perfect.For some reason im not so confident as i used to be.IM SCARED!!!! i feel like im not dat pretty if i was why would my boyfriend left,im scared of not getting hurt,scared of falling in love again cuz break up for me is like hell.We going on our second date tomorrow,how can i manage not looking so afraid? wat to do to have my confidence back,,i actually like the guy hes woooaww ,,he sending little text messages,calling me,making me feel so special,,, please help !!!!!

This is called dating. One date (or two) do not make a relationship. I would assume you are attracted to each other or you wouldn't be going out with each other. That does not make this a long-term commitment or relationship.

If you look needy it will show and you will scare him away. You need to get yourself under check.
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slaibie's Avatar
slaibie Posts: 12, Reputation: 10
New Member
  
#23

Apr 23, 2012, 07:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
Don't get carried away. One date is hardly a fulfilling long term relationship. dating is for having fun getting to know a stranger. Not getting ready for love forever. Can't you enjoy yourself without getting all hung up on past issues?

Can't you just have fun without beating yourself up? Or latching on to a guy who you don't know? If you can't relax, and just enjoy dating and having fun, then you are not ready to date yet. Or maybe you shouldn't commit to dating just one guy, and becoming dependent on his romantic attention.

Hard to move forward and have fun when you still have old bags from the past pulling you back. Having a lack of confidence now is baggage from the past, so let it go!
thank you very much @ Talaniman
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