I have been dating a married man for almost 2 years.. I know it was not suppose to get that far but hey it happened.. We both share our daily lives with each other, talk about family and share the same hobbies.. Everything was good in the beginning or course the impressionable stage but things slacked now, we still go out on occasions, and he has visited me on the holidays.. he is a cool dude but he may be getting tired. He says he is not and want to continue but to me something is different.. In a way, I wish I could let my feelings fade and get over this

shenda

You desire intimacy without the committment; that is never a good place to be; do not be afraid to have your own with all the ups and downs that go with any relationship. More importantly, love yourself enough to want more than a roll in the hey. Be willing to permit real love to tabernacle with you. Do not settle for the left overs when you can enjoy the main course freshly prepared and served just for you. I do not agree with dealing with a married man. It is not a healthy relationship, it is extremely limited and vastly destructive. Too many lives have been ruined by this. You need to make up in your mind that you are worth more than this....you must consider his wife and children, if he has any...help him see his wife anew by not entertaining his company....if you work together....keep it professional....allow someone to love you and not use you....if he loves you, he would have left his wife...my father never left my mother....he played around...but eventually he got tired of being unfaithful and his mistress almost lost her mind becaude she fell in love with my father, but he never loved her, she did not have his heart, nor his money....just like the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world, the woman that possess the man's heart, has his love and there is nothing that he would not do for her.Men play around because they can, most often, because the mistress has fewer demands on him, the mistress is a place of escape from the responsibility and accountability that is before him...think about it...a man that runs/or needs to escape from responsibility/accountability what kind of man is he...in my mind he is a "man-child" aka immature man

talaniman

Glad you didn't come here for sympathy, this is the wrong place for that. The only advice I can give someone in your shoes is send the bum home, you've wasted enough of your life.

chuff

Ah but hey it happened! You say that with absolutely no concern for anyone but yourself, almost an arrogant tone. Which I guess is not a surprise since you are a homewrecker.

Yeah all cool dudes make a commitment to a woman, her family, his family, her friends, his friend, and God at a wedding then cheat.


While I'll tell you why he's being so elusive and distant. He's found someone else. Now he's got a mistress for his mistress. He's cheating on you. He's tired, he doesn't have as much time it all adds up. He's spreading himself to thin. Of course he says nothings changed to you because he always wants your legs open at a moments notice, and if it the other new mistress ever gets smart to this and leaves he'll always have you, his trusted back up plan.

jennymyluv

This saddens me that you would do this.....he made a vow before God..and he's taken......YOu ignored all the rules as if marriage means nothing... If he were to be with you...he would do the same thing to you..... do you ever think of what type of man your attracted to....?? You're attracted to a liar and a cheater.....and a person who doesnt keep his vows...hurts others (his wife) .....Becareful....this may be your change to redeem yourself and walk away.....KEep your self respect....and your dignity...and dont make it a habit to do it again....please for all married peoples sake.......(Im not married and i think its wrong)

Wildcat21

It's because these women believe all the lies these guys tell them.

The ywont ever leave their wives usually because of money.

Wait unti lthe divorce papers are signed AND he has moved out before eve ntalking with that guy again.

These low self esteem women are attracted to them because these guys are not avaialble. Challenge.

jennymyluv

i agree....LOW SELF esteem will put you in situations like that....I have had several sleazy married men pick up on me.....I would say im attractive...I take very good care of myself.....my point is that i get alot of married men hitting on me....I had one incident where my dentist (lab tech) was picking up on me.... It was so bad (i was 20 yrs old at the time...) and at that time acted like a little shy mouse....but i still told him please to leave me alone....I actually got him fired from his job....another incident...im a traffic school.....8 hours....and WOW there was this amazing really attractive guy....( he looked a like a jock..football player..gorgeous....IM mean really gorgeous....i was actually having a good time in my class with this gorgeous hunk...anyhow..this guy .....started talking to me....he asked for my phone number....i had no problem giving it to him....WEll, he'd call me on the ph...from time to time to say.....hi hows it going....we'd have very brief ph...conversations... Maybe after a month or so...he called and said...do you want to meet up and have lunch....SO one day...on my lunch break we sat and ate on the sunset strip.....close to my work....HE was just as handsome as ever...we ate...chatted....he was great.....then he said....You know im married right...? My face...showed how disgusted i was....I told him my very strong beliefs on the subject and told him......whats really horrible is him tring to make me a victim....of his world of dishonesty....lies....lust...!!!! THis guy was a newlywed....very much in love with his wife...but like to mess around......I left the table and said.....LOOSe my number.....!!!! My point is that us a women have to be angry....so that we will not fall into that type of situation..... BE ANGry that this jerk thinks so little of YOU....and selfishly want to please himself not you...his wife or anyone else.....!!! Make yourself strong.....Keep your head up high.....if he's planning on leaving his wife...divorce...wait til the divorce is final....let him know HOW incredible of a woman you are and how much respect you have for yourself.....and with your good heart....(respect for his poor wife) P.S. It might be you one day...

Wildcat21

Every women should tell these married men to go to hell - they need to be divorced.

It's such a HUGE mess these women put themselves in.

Don't get yourself in a relationship that you wouldn't be proud to tell mom and Dad.

This is SUCH an UNHEALTHY position for a woman to be in. So unhealthy and stupid and nothing will come of it - other than you being used.

gypsy456

Married to another woman = not committed to you.

Did the penny drop ?

gypsy456

As for "it was not supposed to get this far but hey it happened..."
Such a bunch of nonsense.

You made a choice.
These thing don't "just happen"....

You made the decision to have an affair with somebody who is married.

bushg

what goes around comes around...he's probably cheating on you.