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I just found out a week ago, on Friday night, that my fiance cheated on me. He apparently had flirted with a lady that we both know at work and who knows me and that we have a family. (We have a little girl together who is 2) Anyway, they have been flirting for "months" and finally took it over the line on the 24th of April, a Thursday. They continued this all the way till I caught them on that Friday by seeing phone records when paying the bill. Then only through questioning relentlessly and making him swear on our daughter did he finally fess up after saying it was just a coworker who was having a rough time and that nothing was going on... They kissed 5 or 6 times.. He would follow her from work so they wouldn't get caught, they would stop on the road, he would get in her car and they would make out. And a couple of times they would go to lunch together and hold hands and kiss on the way to and from. Ugh, I feel sick even writing this. So we have been together 7 years... We are engaged, have a little girl... And I love him dearly even if he broke my heart. After questioning him for the past week about it, we both decided to put this in the past and move on together. I stopped mentioning it and went back to normal. Fake it till you make it right... Yesterday he tells me everything is weird. That I didn't have enough time to think about it or get over it and niether did he. He swears he still loves me and that he didn't have any feelings for her at all... But now he says he is confused and wants me to go stay at my friend's house tomorrow so he can "think". What is going on? I have a feeling that we are over... That he must not love me anymore, or at least isn't in love with me anymore. Are my intuitions correct? Should I get ready for more heartache? He swears he "doesn't want and isn't planning on" breaking up with me... Can I trust this or should I be ready for the ball to drop? Any help?
This is hard for us to just tell you if he's going to break up with you becasue we are not psychic.. I think you should suggest to him about you two seeing a counselor.. You guys need to work out A LOT of stuff before you get married.. there are definatly some problems here... sneaking around and kissing a co-worker is bad, really bad, and probably would had led to much more if he wouldn't had gotten caught.. you need to find out why he did this, and he's proably not sure why either, that's where the counselor can help.. sorry for you heartache
Once a cheater, always a cheater. He says he "had no feelings for her" then why did he do it?! Most people won't go out and make out with someone they don't like. I'd be afraid he go out and do something like this again, and just be more sneaky about it...guys are scandalous
Sorry Rome, I didn't mean ALL guys. I've had more guy friends in my life than girl friends and I know things that their girlfriends have never found out. And I agree, girls have as well.
And I agree that she should leave unless she likes to get cheated on.
Apology accepted :-) and I'm the opposite I have more girlfriends than guys of course when I date, most girls dislike that. But I agree, I know a lot of things they do without telling their boyfriends. I think people in general are quickly going on the decline of honor and respect
"But now he says he is confused and wants me to go stay at my friend's house tomorrow so he can "think"."
Hmmmm... Not trying to open a new can of worms here, but it almost sounds as if he just needs one more night to be unfaithful.
He just needs one single evening to think about things?What is it that he needs to think about? After all, he assured you that he loves you, doesn't want to break up...etc. Sounds fishy to me. He has been with you for 7 years, he should know by now how he really feels about you.
I'm sorry. It just drives me crazy when people say "I just need a day to myself to think things over, but I promise baby that we are not breaking up and I'm not leaving you..."-OK-then what the hell ARE you doing?
I think he is fooling himself and I think he is fooling you. If anything, you should be telling him to go to a friend's house-for a few days- so YOU can think about some things.
My first boyf (at 21) cheated on me with upwards of 5 or 6 girls at a time. I would get calls at work saying that they were his girlfriend...and he would always deny it. For a year. He still cheats on his gf, who is now his baby's mama (and she says she knows but only god can judge)
My first boyf (at 21) cheated on me with upwards of 5 or 6 girls at a time. I would get calls at work saying that they were his girlfriend...and he would always deny it. For a year. He still cheats on his gf, who is now his baby's mama (and she says she knows but only god can judge)
Don't be stupid like her...
Yep, I"ve been you, and I've been that girl! (the baby mama in denial of a cheating man)
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