Ok some may remember me while others won't. I have been with my gf for 4 years now. We broke up after two and then got back together. Well I am 24 and she is 23.
The day before yesterday I had time to spend with my girlfriend because I was working all week. we had a great time and I was soo happy.
Later that day I was on my way to work and I called her and she rushed me off because she had to sleep and she was tired. so I said okay and I let her go. Right before I went into work I called to say I love you because I was going to work from 12 midnight to 8 AM. when I called, she answered her phone by mistake and I heard a club scene in the background really loud with people talking. It lasted about 12 seconds and then it hung up. she didn't know she answered but I was shocked because she was out while I thought she was sleeping. The fact that she rushed me off to go to sleep and I believed it somehow kills me and destroyed my trust.
So I kept calling and texting back and finally she answered and I'm guessing she took a while because she had to leave the club to speak. She tells me she is in her friends car and so I told her to prove it and she did. She says that her friend was sad n they went to talk n they are at a store. Well we got off the phone as I had to get to work. While I was at work I called and called and text and text. she didn't call me back till 5 am!
she says she was driving around and walking at a park talking to her friend and got home at 3 am but slept and then called me at 5 because she was mad that I asked so many questions and was angry.
Well my problem is that I feel she took advantage of me going to work and then she lied to me about sleeping and decided to go out. That really hurt me soo much. Then I caught her at a club scene and she denies it but yet from 12 to 5 am she doesn't answer my calls. If she was really driving or walkin and talking she could have answered to speak to me. we never ignore each other for that long which leads me to believe she was partying.

Additiona Info... She lied to me. She told me shw was going to send me sexy pics and then she didn't because she said she was too tired and lying down...yet she can go out till 3 am she says? I feel so sad, mad, and hurt. We had a great day and she even sent me two pics of myself and said she loves me and misses me just before she did all this.

jmjoseph

Trust should be one of the most important things in a relationship. If you can't trust her, move on to someone else who you can trust.


Are you willing to leave her?

There must be something else going on between you two.

Has she done other things?

If she told you she wanted to go out to a club with friends, what would be your response?

People involved in relationships NEED to go ouy with their friends, away from their partners.

Girls and guys alike, need to go out and have a good time alone. We all need to feel attractive to other people. As long as it's just innocent fun.

Did she feel like she had to be dishonest to you?

Are you a jealous person?

emopunk7

wow...you ask very good questions with great points. I am a jealous person and in a way I do believe she had to be dishonest with me. But then again she is the same way. she would be upset if I went out alone as well. it has been an issue before. I think we both have to sneak in order to hang out alone with others but it still hurt me that she lied ti me and said she was going to sleep. its a smack in the face. I would be a bit upset if she was going out to a bar or club without me. I wouldn't go to one without her so why would she? why dance with others when we have each other?

simoneaugie

Why lie? because she has a jealous boyfriend. Why dance with other guys at a club? 'cause she can't dance with you while you're working. She might have something else going on. If you don't like her behavior, don't text or call, meet up with her face to face and tell her how you feel.

jmjoseph

"What's good for the goose, is good for the gander".

You can't have it one sided.

You can't get mad at her for something you do yourself.

Once you get past the jealous, petty, behavior( both of you), you'll be able to have a meaningful relationship.

Until then, you're just playing games.

emopunk7

Well it is hard for me to trust. I should tell you that I paid her back yesterday. I acted very nice the same way she did n then I did exactly to the last detail everything she did to me. I sent the same exact messages back n went to a bar n all. now she is mad at me.

DerelictHerds

Well we all know how this is gonna end. When you two break up and end up pissed at each other, you'll have time to focus on growing up.

friend4u178

Thats just childish , stop playing games and Communicate with each other. You'd have thought after being together for this long you could at least do that.

paxe

I'm going to be a bit harsh but you need to get more confidence in yourself. First of all 4 years is a long time and if you can't trust you may as well break up right now. Secondly, you are assuming too much when you don't really have any proofs, you only had hints. Thirdly, playing games is only for kids, you are an adult right now, act like it.

Sorry to sound so harsh, but if you really love her you would have an adult conversation with her and not play games. We sometimes want to, but we have to be the better and wiser person.

talaniman

Hi again Eguy, long time no hear from.

To your question, the others are right, your both playing games with each other instead of talking, and being honest.

Why feed into your bad points, when you both could be learning to let go of the jealousy, the unrealistic expectations you have with each other, and high school games, and enjoy being apart sometimes.

Then you wouldn't have to be mad, and the trust issue could be put to rest.

You both have to lie to get some space, and freedom, from each other, when it doesn't have to be that way.

Let the emotional dust settle, and talk about it.