I feel silly being upset by this break up. We weren't together very long at all. I just seem stuck on it and I can't move on. My ex broke up with me about a month ago. He said he thought things had moved too quickly between us and he didn't feel like he knew me as well as he should. He said that he saw me as a great friend, that he thought I was attractive, he thought we had a lot in common, that we got along great, that he wasn't sure why he felt the way he did(about me being a friend). He said he wanted to continue to talk and get to know me better and that maybe we could try again in the future.

At first, I was upset and I ignored him for a few days. Then I got lonely and spoke to him some. Then I regretted my decision to talk to him and told him I couldn't be his friend. Which would have been great had I stuck to it, but days later I was talking to him again and I have been ever since. So we've been "friends" for most of this past month. We talk online almost daily, mostly him messaging me first, but I message him first sometimes. He's very friendly and upbeat when he talks to me. Thing is, he only wants to talk about this online game he's playing, or completely random stuff. I play it too, but not nearly as much as he does. I keep hoping one day he'll bring SOMETHING up about the break up, but it hasn't happened yet.

I know I need to stop thinking about getting back together, but it's difficult. I feel fine when I'm at work or when I'm off during the day and I know he's at work. But every evening, I start wondering what he's doing, if he's online, if he's out with his friends. I've tried deleting him off my AIM so I can't see whether he's online or not, but I always get so curious that I re-add him just to check. I guess I worry that if I do go NC, that yeah, he'll miss me, but he'll also just get over me that much quicker. I think a part of me thinks that if we stay in contact and are friendly, that he'll eventually want to try again. I also know that it's very possible that he'll never feel this way and that I could potentially drag this feeling out longer hoping so. I need advice!

starbuck8

I think it's the other way around. The more available you make yourself to him, the less likely he is to make up his mind sooner. Why give him that power anyway. Get out and do other things with friends or whatever it is you used to do at night or on your days off, so you won't have a chance to be at home just wondering what he's doing.

If he sees that you won't sit and wait, he will be forced to make a decision. If he doesn't come around again, then there is your answer. He just wasn't that into you. Isn't it better to know now before you invest more time in him? It will hurt alot more if you keep on doing what you're doing, and in the end he tells you he has decided he still just wants to remain friends.

Give him something to miss!

talaniman

That exactly what your doing. Holding on to false hope and keeping him alive in your life.

Stop ALL contact, and let time do the rest.

Rebuild your life that you enjoy, with friends and activities, and be happy with yourself.