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    FP1977's Avatar
    FP1977 Posts: 5, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 24, 2007, 11:13 AM
    Broke up and in NC.How to talk about house we own?
    Hi guys... just a little background: Girlfriend of 8.5yrs and I took a "break" 2months ago and officially ended it 2.5weeks ago. She just didn't know if I was "the One". So I let her go and figure out whatever it is she needs to figure out 2.5weeks ago. I've entered into NC with her and it is killing me. The big problem is we own a house together. We were in therapy and the therapist suggested we give it 30days before we make any decisions on the house. I know already I want out (either we sell it, or she buys me out). As much as I want to hear her voice and talk to her, I don't know if I"m quite ready to just have a "business" conversation with her. So how do I handle this while trying to avoid hurting myself further? Also, I REALLY need suggestions of how to fill my free time up (we spent 90% of our weekends together and now there's this huge void of what to do with myself). Friends are very limited to me on the weekends because of work, significant others, etc.
    GlindaofOz's Avatar
    GlindaofOz Posts: 2,334, Reputation: 354
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Sep 24, 2007, 11:21 AM
    Anyway to work through a third party arbitrator? That might help ease trying to have a rationale conversation when emotions are still running high.

    As for how to fill your weekends. I would suggest picking up some new hobbies or sports. After my last break up I did a ton of things. I began rock climbing, I went to trapeze school, I learned how to shoot archery, a began knitting, crocheting. I joined about 4 million clubs. It was great distraction. You could check out a site like craigslist.org which lists groups and clubs or a site like meetup.com which does the same but is a site solely dedicated to people looking to join a club or a team of some sort. ( I personally belonged to about 30 meetup groups - trust me it helps. Its like should I sit at home and mope tonight or go out to this random event. )
    statictable's Avatar
    statictable Posts: 436, Reputation: 34
    Full Member
     
    #3

    Sep 24, 2007, 02:03 PM
    Attorney, worth the money and will save your heart and soul... Once started don't stop. You'll survive. Seek no advice from friends, neighbors, mailman, garbage collector, door to door salesperson. Advice will come from your attorney. Be strong and hope that she remains focused. Take care of all shared debit/credit cards, car insurance and shared credit accounts.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    Sep 28, 2007, 03:19 PM
    You need to cut this clean and settle your business with this house, and a third party is just a good way to go so you can move on. An attorney or real estae agent can handle this nicely for you.
    Newguy2009's Avatar
    Newguy2009 Posts: 183, Reputation: 57
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Jan 28, 2010, 12:34 PM

    Just curious, sorry I know this is an old post but what was the outcome with the house? I am going through the same thing because she is still on the loan. She moved out 3 months ago and I am still making payments. I am waiting to get my income taxes back so I can see an attorney. I have exhausted all other avenues.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
    Uber Member
     
    #6

    Jan 28, 2010, 12:39 PM

    Newguy I don't think he'll be back-maybe post a thread in the legal forum about your problem?

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