OK.. so myself and my boyfriend are 23 years old, we've been together for nearly 2 years and live together. I've never been with anyone I loved, got along with, and enjoyed being with as much as I do him. We (normally, well previously) joke and have fun and are very physically compatible as well.

But l been this one bone of contention between us... as the title suggests he won't or cant say "i love you." not even "love you too" when I put myself out there. Now I know guys don't like to talk about themselves, and I myself am not the kind of girl who likes to sit around talking about feelings and mush. But I cant get past this. I've been rationalizing that actions speak louder than words (which I believe is very true) but this makes it even more confusing. If he acts it every day and in pretty much every way how come he cant SAY it. Not even ONCE. There's always "i care very deepy for you" and "i like spending time with you more than anyone else" which just makes me angry, because I don't want to be his friend or someone he just enjoys "spending time with" (though he refers to me as his girlfriend to others. Yay.)

I've confronted him about this and he usually gets defensive and upset/freaked. I ask "do you love me?" he says "i dont know. i dont want to be lying if i dont" which I interpret as if he doesn't know by now than he doesn't. But he also says he wouldn't act in a way he doesn't feel. Which is just ****ing confusing. I'm getting paranoid about what his motives are, if he doesn't love me why is he with me and why has he been this way,and if everything we had was/is a lie. We've had this fight before and I let it go, but this last round... I cant let it go anymore. I know I've been cold and avoidant to him the past few days, while he tries to go on like everything is normal, but I don't know how I'm supposed to act around him if he doesn't love me, because if he really did and knew this hurt me so bad wouldn't he try to figure it out? Or is it just simply I care more about him than he does me?

I'm his first "serious" relationship, he has severe social anxiety disorder (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_anxiety_disorder) and is about to go into counseling for it (hes been medicated before but isn't now) I want nothing more than to be with him and am devastated and will be more so if this continues on this path of destruction. Its just something I need to hear. At least once.

Sorry this post has become a novel. Any insight appreciated.. thanks.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_anxiety_disorder