I am having a bit of a dilemma, me and my boyfriend have been going out for four years and have been through so much in that time. He split up with me last year but soon begged for me back and has assuredme that i am the only oe for him and he wants to spen the rest of his life with me and splitting up with me was the biggest mistake of his life. We have an extremely happy relationship and are so in love. However I am just comingto the end of my university degree and need to decide what i will do afterwards. My options are moving 300 miles back home and away from my boyfriend, and in my experinece i am very bad at long distance relationships so i don't think that would work. Or i can stay where i am but i will ave noone to live with as all my friends are moving away. Me and my boyfriend have sat down and talked about this and i have told him i would love to live with him and i am totally ready as i am 100% happy with our relationship, also he has no plans for living next year. However he said he is not ready to live with me and i was so hurt and couldn't stop crying because it just doesn't make sense when he says he wants to spend the est of his life with me and we stay over eachothers every night anyway. I don't know what to do, i don't want to stay in this city and live with strangers but i dont want to go home and have to break up with my boyfriend, please help...

Northwind_Dagas

Sounds to me as though he was not serious when he said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. If he had pratical reason why you two should not live together, that would be one thing. But to say "I'm not ready to live with you" in my opinion means, "I'm not ready to close the door to other options yet."

It seems he is stringing you along until he's certain he won't find someone else who he thinks is better. You shouldn't let him do that, and since you face a big decision, perhaps its time to provide him an alternative.

talaniman

4 Years and not ready to commit?????????? Don't let him hold you back. Talk is cheap as you have found out, so forget him, and do what you want. Its your life and if he can't keep up, his problem, not yours.

shizukamelodi

ok, question one : does he love you? If so then be patient with him. He might be in a bit of shock let him have his space and let yourself relax for a bit.maybe find an apartment closer to him.

if you decide to move away tell him how you feel for him and that being apart won't change that and you still want a relationship.I f he doesn't then you'll have to face that he isn't thr right guy. sorry but i hop this helps a little. good luck!