My boyfriend has a new female friend, and I am very jealous, should I be worried?

talaniman · Jun 11, 2011, 01:28 PM

Time for a better boyfriend?

BK201 · Jun 11, 2011, 09:47 PM

You have done a neat job by communicating to both of them. Told the girl too politely, which is nice. Sum it up, you have done your best, you don't have to loose your self esteem anymore, it is just his loss. He will realize your value only when you move, the new girl is blinding his eyes. One day he will get bored of her too, but he does not know that you won't be there to go back to.

zambers · Jun 12, 2011, 03:25 AM

@BK201: what did you mean by "but he does not know that you won't be there to go back to"?

BK201 · Jun 12, 2011, 06:06 AM

My bad, I thought a few steps ahead, which is not relevant at this point when things are still not clear.
So, when you talked to your boyfriend about this girl, what did he say?
Did he say she is just a friend? And what did he say when you asked him to stop talking to her?
Two possibilities here:
1. He does not tell about her clearly/completely, like when are they spending time together, what do they do etc.
2. He talks to you openly about how that girl is, and you know in and out about their friendship. At least you know what is going on between them.
If it is the first case, then you should give him a clear warning that its either her or you, it is your prerogative.

amicon · Jun 12, 2011, 06:39 AM

Me, I'd tell him to get lost-he's behaviour's not acceptable.

zambers · Jun 12, 2011, 08:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BK201

My bad, I thought a few steps ahead, which is not relevant at this point when things are still not clear.
So, when you talked to your boyfriend about this girl, what did he say?
Did he say she is just a friend? And what did he say when you asked him to stop talking to her?
Two possibilities here:
1. He does not tell about her clearly/completely, like when are they spending time together, what do they do etc.
2. He talks to you openly about how that girl is, and you know in and out about their friendship. At least you know what is going on between them.
If it is the first case, then you should give him a clear warning that its either her or you, it is your prerogative.

Well, he doesn't say much about her, i'll ask him why he thinks she's so interesting or why he likes talking to her a lot, and he will either not say anything or say "I don't know".
Yes, he has said that she's just a friend, but I sort of don't believe it.
And when I have asked him to stop talking about her, he hasn't, only when he notices that I start to get really angry.
Yup, he never really tells me what they talk about, sometimes, but it's always very brief, but it would be nice if he told me a bit more.
I tell him what I talk about with my male friends out of respect for him.

I have given him a clear message, we almost broke up the other day, he had ignorned me the whole day because he knew I was going to want to break up, and when I quickly glanced at his phone, he was still talking to her!
Than, he convienced me that he'd change and everything, but still nothing.

I think maybe its time if him and I actually broke up.

zambers · Jun 12, 2011, 08:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amicon

Me, I'd tell him to get lost-he's behaviour's not acceptable.

Thanks, haha :)
I believe I will probably do the deed today.
I'm so tired of everything that's been going on.

amicon · Jun 12, 2011, 08:29 AM

Good luck and take care.

BK201 · Jun 12, 2011, 08:31 AM

You are clearly going in the right direction, just that things are going wrong. But it won't be for long. It will truly be his loss. Prepare for this following situation too: What are you going to do, if, at the point of breaking he says he will quit talking to her once and for all and he swears to God?

My boyfriend has a new female friend, and I am very jealous, should I be worried?

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