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Home > Family & People > Relationships   »   Why won't my fiancee have sex with me?

 
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Old May 6, 2008, 05:32 PM
vanillasparkle
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Why won't my fiancee have sex with me?

I have been engaged for 1 year now and my fiancee and I have always had a very healthy sexual appetite.The problem is for the past month or two he hasn't been wanting to have sex.Sometimes I will try to do it with him and he says he is to tired.He then lays down,but about 5 min. later he is in the bathroom masturbating.Why do you think he does this....is something wrong with me....does he not enjoy being intimate with me?
PS:I tried talking to him about it and he just blew it off and got mad.
help!

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Old May 6, 2008, 08:25 PM   #2  
ChihuahuaMomma
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There is definitely something wrong. Talk to him whether he gets mad or not. Sit him down and tell him there is something very serious that the two of you need to talk about. We can't tell you what is going on with him. We can only speculate based on information provided from you. And that's one side of the story. Talk to him.
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Old May 6, 2008, 09:13 PM   #3  
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wow that sucks u need to talk talk talk and if it doesnt solve anything leave him hes got the problem not u

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ChihuahuaMomma disagrees: Yes, leaving will fix their issue. They are obviously in a serious relationship, as they are getting engaged.
MommyLeah agrees: If he isn't willing to talk to her then what other option do you think she should take ChihuahuaMomma? I agree with Jlamberto, If he won't talk to you about it, you need to tell him you will have to take a break or leave him if he doesn't.
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Old May 7, 2008, 03:22 AM   #4  
liz28
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This problems needs to be resolve because you walk down the aisle. Did anything else change besides this? There have to be something that is effecting him but dont think thats it your fault and if he get mad when you bring up the subject so what because remember communication is very important, did he stop commuicating with you in other ways?
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Old May 7, 2008, 04:55 AM   #5  
talaniman
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I'm willing to bet money there are some serious issues that need resolving. Finding out is what must be done before a marriage can take place. Sex is only a symptom of a greater problem. You've been engaged for a year, but how old is the relationship and what are your ages?
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Old May 7, 2008, 06:08 AM   #6  
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To be honest a relationship walks with 4 legs like dogs do. One leg is communication, Second leg is Trust, Third leg is Financial and Fourth leg is Sex. If you guys break one of this legs your relationship can't walk, you have to talk to him about it and to be honest that's not even the only problem you guys have you are facing communication problems as well. You may want to concider talking to him and if doesn't work let him go as bad as sound, because if this is like this now imagine after you get married... Good luck with your decision.
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Old May 7, 2008, 12:27 PM   #7  
emopunk7
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Maybe he is uncomfortable with his body and is insecure. He may not want to take off his clothes nor be touched...he finds it less uncomfortable masturbating and not worrying if you will be disgusted by him...try passing by n with light tender and quick touches say "wow, you sexy!" or "wow, your arms feels so good, or i love touching your stomach, i love it. See what that does. Then give it 2 days.
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Old May 7, 2008, 01:12 PM   #8  
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MommyLeah--they are plenty of other options...the first that comes to mind is counseling. Do you give up on everything that gives you a problem or do you try and fix the problem??

Kirope--That's a great way to look at things. Touche!

Talaninman--Always hits the nail on the head. Perhaps he is harboring anger about something....

Op--try delving in what could be bothering him, because its something. Look at the rest of the relationship and see what else has changed, and see if that could possibly affect things.

Please keep us updated. We have some great people here who give great advice.
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