from a bad reltionship to a good but that turned bad to!
Hi People,
I am a newbie here, i will have to start from the beginning i was going through a bad relationship a few years ago, i was going through domestic violence etc etc. After i gave birth to my daughter i then decided that i didnt want her around violence and arguments everyday so i told my ex he should leave and we have no relationship anymore, things got worser he would not leave and started torturing me,he was always at home he would not work because he knew i would leave him.
He never left me despite me asking him to for months and months things were escalating arguments were getting worser my bruises were getting worser, i fell into depression and at that point i didnt know what was going on with me i even started self harming myself, a few months later my ex started work but i was always kept an eye on fron his friends etc even if i wanted to go i had no were to go.
Basically i the relationship was finished i was at a point were i hated him but he would not leave my house he would stay there. I felt trapped and ar if there was no way out until i met someone when i met him i told him everything he was so caring and helped me move away from my ex but then i started feeling for him but never said anything as i had my daughter to look after, then after a while we ended up sleeping with eachother and we bonded a strong relationship and my daughter bonded a strong relationship with him to. He told me he was married and had kids, he said it was a arranged marriage and its only the kids he would see.
We had little tiff but then i agreed because of my daughter being so close to hime 2 years went by happy having a good life met his family and kids they yould come down every weekend. But then things changed he was never here and even stopped staying with me, i was confused but i asked him again and again he kept lying and making exscuses until i found out that he be's at home with his kids mother and kids, so i told him to leave and i dont want to see him anymore but now i am back in the same situation we have a another daughter and im pregnant but he doesnt leave he comes and rqends time here and goes. He says he loves me and things will be back to normal, just be patient. Now i dont know what to do!
If you were ready to leave your first husband then you should have left, not wait for him to leave.
You finally do leave but it's because you took an interest in a replacement beau, who was married with children, without spending any time dealing with the abuse you had endured for many years.
Now he is returning to his wife you are devastated and have more children that you have added to this catastrophy... does that about sum it up?
Stop thinking about yourself.
Think for your children.
Seek counseling, be a mother.
LEAVE ALL MEN alone.
You are so lost, but a man is not going to save you.
It's time to depend on yourself.
First I'm going to suggest that you spend some time alone soul searching and strengthening your love for yourself. Through that you will come to the realization that you deserve better and you wil treat yourself better. Secondly, I'm going to beg you to stop dragging your daughter through the back and forths of your life. children need stability and so do you for that matter.
Currently you are with a married man that has two familys and is lying and cheating? and you are expecting a baby by him? is that correct?
He is stringing you along. He isn't going to leave her for you or he would already be in the process. He spends time with you when he can get away with it....making excuses to the wife like he feel asleep at his guy friends, overnight business trip or whatever. He says whatever it takes to give you a little hope so you will stick with him. He is lying and cheating and you are allowing him to keep you down.
If you were ready to leave your first husband then you should have left, not wait for him to leave.
You finally do leave but it's because you took an interest in a replacement beau, who was married with children, without spending any time dealing with the abuse you had endured for many years.
Now he is returning to his wife you are devastated and have more children that you have added to this catastrophy... does that about sum it up?
Stop thinking for yourself.
Think for your children.
Seek counseling, be a mother.
LEAVE ALL MEN alone.
You are so lost, but a man is not going to save you.
It's time to depend on yourself.
No i never took interest in a replacement, i was a scared 19 year old who had no one to turn to no family or friendr, he was a friend that helped but things got out of hand.
He is stringing you along. He isn't going to leave her for you or he would already be in the process. He spends time with you when he can get away with it....making excuses to the wife like he feel asleep at his guy friends, overnight business trip or whatever. He says whatever it takes to give you a little hope so you will stick with him. He is lying and cheating and you are allowing him to keep you down.
Does his wife know about you at all?
Yes they all know about me his parents family and wife he has also said he is going to marry me and his parents see my kids and spend time with them. I do want out of this relationship so i can do something with my life but he does not accept it.
No i never took interest in a replacement, i was a scared 19 year old who had no one to turn to no family or friendr, he was a friend that helped but things got out of hand.
Basically he was a replacement.
Often many people get into a relationship to replace their parents because they feel empty or alone. Then they get into other relationships that replace the one that didn't work out whether it was intentional or not. It doesn't necessarily mean you are codependent. Often it just happens.
Yes they all know about me his parents family and wife he has also said he is going to marry me and his parents see my kids and spend time with them. I do want out of this relationship so i can do something with my life but he does not accept it.
First, he is going to marry you with the exception of the fact he IS MARRIED?
If you want out of the relationship, then GET OUT, don't do the same thing you did with the first abuser, just keep hanging around, waiting.
He doesn't have to accept that you want out of the relationship, you just stop communication, he doesn't have a choice, he has A WIFE.
First I'm going to suggest that you spend some time alone soul searching and strengthening your love for yourself. Through that you will come to the realization that you deserve better and you wil treat yourself better. Secondly, I'm going to beg you to stop dragging your daughter through the back and forths of your life. children need stability and so do you for that matter.
Currently you are with a married man that has two familys and is lying and cheating? and you are expecting a baby by him? is that correct?
Yes i am expecting from him, they are my daughters only i know how much i do for them i have told him he can see kids because i dont want to take him away from them but he does not listen to what i ask of him or the times that he can see the kids, he comes when ever he wants. Ive even threatened hit that i will take a injunction out on him if he doesnt listen to me.
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