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I am in a relationship, but have fallen in love with another man.

Asked Apr 14, 2009, 05:34 PM — 13 Answers
I have been in this relationship for over 5 years, but I fell out of love with him long ago. I have now met and fell in love with another man. My current boyfriend is trying to convice me to stay with him, but I no longer want him, but I do not want to break his heart. What do I do?

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13 Answers
snow124's Avatar
snow124 Posts: 116, Reputation: 135
Junior Member
  
#2

Apr 14, 2009, 05:51 PM
You've already broken his heart by falling in love with someone else while with him. Leave him, and make it clear you aren't getting back together. You do both of you a disservice if you don't.
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ylaira's Avatar
ylaira Posts: 1,193, Reputation: 641
Ultra Member
  
#3

Apr 14, 2009, 06:31 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessibaby1113 View Post
I have been in this relationship for over 5 years, but I fell out of love with him long ago.
Don't waste another 5 more years. People stay in relationship out of love not because of pity. You both deserves to be happy with other people....be firm on this no matter what.
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stillfading's Avatar
stillfading Posts: 45, Reputation: 15
Junior Member
  
#4

Apr 14, 2009, 06:40 PM
Dude having this done to me it SUCKS. You need to leave him and be honest at all times. I won't say you falling in love with another guy is right or wrong, but staying with the old boyfriend and stringing him along or trying to soften the blow creates an AMAZING AMOUNT OF HURT

I am there right now and please don't do it to him.
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jjwoodhull's Avatar
jjwoodhull Posts: 1,378, Reputation: 1210
Ultra Member
  
#5

Apr 14, 2009, 06:44 PM
You are hurting him more by not leaving. Make a clean break. He deserves much better than what he has gotten. Leave him alone and give him the opportunity to be in a happy, healthy relationship.
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I wish's Avatar
I wish Posts: 5,256, Reputation: 10093
Family & People Expert
  
#6

Apr 14, 2009, 07:48 PM


You have to let him know that you don't love him anymore. There's no point dragging it out.

He's going to be heartbroken as soon as you break up, it won't matter what the reason is.
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friend4u178's Avatar
friend4u178 Posts: 3,452, Reputation: 7927
Ultra Member
  
#7

Apr 14, 2009, 08:18 PM
The others are right , if you don't love your current boyfriend its better in the long run to leave him now and not string him along.

However its important that you don't jump straight into a Relationship with this other guy , that would just make it a Rebound.
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talaniman's Avatar
talaniman Posts: 44,360, Reputation: 50366
Senior Family & People Expert
  
#8

Apr 15, 2009, 06:16 AM


You should have been gone a long time ago, when you knew your feelings had changed for this guy. Now you have hurt him a lot more by not being honest, and letting him move on.

Thats not fair. Seems to me you were just waiting for another to come along any way, so don't act all concerned for your boyfriend now. You didn't care before!

Thats not right at all.
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ITstudent2006's Avatar
ITstudent2006 Posts: 2,233, Reputation: 1666
Networking & Computers Expert
  
#9

Apr 15, 2009, 06:27 AM
People like you make me sick. Why would still be with your current b/f if you don't love him anymore. You're lying to him everyday, living a life/relationship on false emotions.

You owe it to your current b/f to let him go and tell him the truth. Yeah it will hurt him but not as much as when he finds out you haven't loved him years and are in love with another man.

I guess I don't understand some people. Why stay with someone if you don't love them, why? You've wasted the time of you current b/f for not! Only to break his heart and strip him of any pride.

Rick
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ITstudent2006's Avatar
ITstudent2006 Posts: 2,233, Reputation: 1666
Networking & Computers Expert
  
#10

Apr 15, 2009, 07:22 AM
I'm only harsh because I've beenstrung along before. It sucks to realize your last 12 months have been a total lie that's all.

Rick
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