Hi I'm 24 and my boyfriend 26 we are together a year and a half,my problem my boyfriend is always looking at the girls women.. we go for a drink an the whole time like this and then when with his friends there are little comments , I've never been very jealous I think but now I don't know if every time I'm getting more paranoid or what.I tell him that I don't like it and he says what have I got eyes for and me as well?it drives me crazy.apart from this when we meet with friends of his single or not all all they talk about is women. Recently we went to a wedding its was a friend of his from the university the girl was very pretty so imagine how I felt when he spoke with her he had to touch her arm put his arm around her waist etc. is this too normal? as well as this he didn't tale his eyes off he for the whole night.. ooh and he took about 10 photos of her.. so that night I couldn't believe the situation and got sour.. am I crazy or too jealous.. he thinks I'm too jealous as its not the first time we had tiffs for this am I insequre and being silly?

I don't think you will ever be happy with a man who is constantly watching and commenting about other women. Some men and women are fine with their partners doing this and some are not. You clearly are not. He does not think there is anything wrong with it. You are a bad match.

Options:
1. You start leering at men and making comments about them until he acknowledges that maybe it isn't okay and agrees to stop. More likely, he'll become angry, you'll stop and he'll half stop but make it clear in small ways, he's still entitled to do it. Or he'll escalate, justifying that by your doing it. Then you break up...

OR
2. Asking him to please stop because it makes you miserable. Be very clear about what behaviors bother you and write them down for them in a short list if that will help (so he can't pretend he didn't understand). Wait two weeks.
3. Tell him you will break up with him soon if he does not stop. Pick a deadline for yourself to decide whether to stay or not. Most likely he will do a little less, enough to give you hope but will find other ways to make you feel insecure. You won't be sure whether you are "justified" in leaving even though you are still unhappy. You stay and continue feeling bad.

4. My opinion is that he is not a good match for you, and you should just find someone with your values. If you stay with him, he will continue to make you jealous and that will become part of who you are.

Been there...

I agree with Asking as you seem to be a bad match with this guy who is the touchy feely jovial outgoing type, and probably can't understand, or has a clue to why the way he does, what he does, would bother you.

This is where honest communications has to come into the picture, so you both know how the other feels, and what should be done about it.

There is no shame in NOT being compatible, the shame is NOT doing the right things about it. Its an even bigger shame when partners don't talk about it with EACH OTHER.

I agree with Talaniman. There's no shame in not being compatible.

Addendum. My own personal and limited experience with touchy feely men of this kind is that (1) they are sometimes a lot more sensitive when the shoe is on the other foot (i.e. the woman watches men, hugs them, and comments*) and (2) the men do not want to break up even when there is a clear lack of compatibility on this issue.

*That is, the men have complaints about previous partners talking to or commenting about other men.

Its complicated.. but all the answeres have made perfect sense I can't bare this I can't tolerate it as someone said there are couples who open about this but that's not for me.I feel like I don't exist or I must be ugly.ill never be cool with this ,but apart from these things I'm really good with him that's the problem.

Most people can get along well n many areas of interaction, but it only takes one big area of disagreement to start a disaster. If this or any problem CANNOT be resolved by some sort of compromise through honest communications, the relationship dies.

Start communicating, and being honest.

He's a smooth talker and very good with women. If you plan on being in a long relationship you have to trust him.

I would be uncomfortable if my husband stared at a woman all the time, but has he cheated or given you any other reason to be jealous?

If you can handle the "girl watching" and him talking about women with his friends then try too not be jealous.

In my honest opinion, I don't think your jealousy will change and neither will his flirting. You have to figure out how to handle this.

When I met him first he was in a relationship and insisted on taking me for a drink as I heard he had a girlfriend I refused so maybe also for this reason.well he never goes out without me so I know that he is faithful but if given a chance,who knows