I know that I am a lot older than either of you, but I don't think that my preferences have changed all that much over the years as far as the kind of woman that I would want as a soulmate or potential partner. I can just think of more of what I would look for, now that I am older.
To me, she would be sensitive and aware to what and who she is as a person and not be set in her ways. Willing to accept others for who and what they are, if the person in whom she is interested is willing to change for the better. Willing to stick to commitments that she makes in her life and with others. Sociable and willing to make an effort to meet new people and make friends and maintain the friendships on a healthy basis. An ability to laugh and have fun. An ability to be spontaneous in situations rather than appearing to act as though there is some sort of script that has been written concerning how she "must" act or say things. Somewhat childlike and definitely creative. Able to "go with the flow" as far as where creativity is leading a couple in whatever endeavor. Not one to "play games" or hide things concerning thoughts and actions in a relationship. An ability to enable others to be the best that they can be for themselves and also to find the ways to enable herself to be the best that she can be. To be the kind of friend in a relationship that is one of the winter kind of friends, like an Evergreen, always there no matter what happens, supportive and also gives "tough love" where it needs to happen, rather then the summer type of friend in a relationship, who is there for the good times and not there when the going gets rough. A person who dreams of the things to come and also realizes that in order to attain those dreams that she must take action on them for them to be realities. A lover of music, but not just one kind of music. One who is not threatened by the abilities, of whatever kind, of her partner. A person who is always willing to try new things as long as they are safe to try, and by trying them, will maybe benefit herself and her partner. A woman, who will realize, that over time, people will change, and will be willing to adapt to the changes happening in her partner's life, as well as her own life, so that a healthy relationship can continue. One who strives to be a winner and not a quitter. A listener as well as one who knows how to give advice based upon the needs of the other person. A lover and not a fighter as far as a relationship is concerned. Willing to give as well as take. One who may "dish it out" but who is also able to take it when it is "dished out" to her. Calm and collected during those times that she needs to be. And, exited as well as vivacious during those times when the situation calls for it. One who knows how to be passionate and caring. One who can stand firm and justify fighting for a worthy cause as well as garnishing the information and troops that she needs in order to help in the battle. One who will eventually become friends with her children when they are grown and still have the ability to be their mother as the circumstances dictate. A person who is willing to change the sheets and my Depend's later on in life if it is so needed. One who knows that there may not be any absolutes in certain things in life, and is willing to change accordingly to what may be a better and more healthy way of thinking as well as living.
One who is willing to grow old with me and be there during the good times as well as the bad.
A person who is a devout Christian and is also devoted to following and studying the teachings of the Holy Bible.
One who has no problem with telling me that "Well, there's the man of my life!" And, "I love you!" And, is accepting and encouraging of the fact when I tell her the same thing about herself in return.
A person who will be able to hold my hand someday when I am on my deathbed and tell me that she loves me and that no matter what happens, that everything will be okay. That she is secure in the fact that I would do the same for her.
For me, what a woman should do in order to have and maintain a relationship, is to first listen, then act according to the needs of her potential partner, secondly to what she wants. Hopefully, her partner will also be doing the same thing. Give and take. Love without conditions placed upon that love.
Eight or nine years younger than the other, is not such a big deal if both of you are secure in what you want to have out of your individual lives and where you want to go with the same. Since you are almost 20 years old, there may be some things for your own life that you have not explored yet, that would make it better and more for what you would like out of your own life. I would hope that your potential partner would be willing to accept that fact and give you the freedom to find yourself concerning the things that you would like to do for your own life while still being together on the adventure of a life together.
If you care about someone and also love them and want a relationship to continue, you will show them that you love them by first communicating that fact to them. You tell them that you love them. You don't write it, you don't text it or email it, or do it over the phone, you tell them while looking into their eyes. Other ways of communicating this intention are secondary to that. They are okay ways of doing it, but the first and most important way of doing it so the other person knows that you truly mean it, is by looking in their eyes and saying it.
Anyway, these have been my thoughts. You asked for what guys thought. I have just given you mine. Hopefully, others will come along and share their thoughts too.
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