Hi I am so lost in my thoughts on this topic. I have been with my boyfriend for 10 years,,and we have bene distant for abou 6 rather than leave I started just having an affair with a married man 20 years older than me. Hes 45 and im 26. He has 3 kids and a great wife. He was happy guy when i met him he never seemed to have bad relationship with his wife,,although he must have been missing something to have met me. He has 2 wonderful kids ages 17 and 12. hes very close to both of his kids. I have fallen head over heels in love with this man to the point that I want to leave my boyfriend and be with him. I have never met anyone like him who i feel like i need every single day. Its messing me up in my mind because i feel so bad for what i am doing,,hes married with 2 kids and i feel like a home wrecker. Im guilty of falling in love with a married man. This affair has been going on for a year and a half. When i talked to him about us being together he says he loves me more than he loves his wife but that he wants to keep his family together for his kids sake. I know hes a good father and i understand how he feels but everyday that he goes home to his wife my heart sinks. I do love my boyfreind but we just arent made to stay together and I was hoping this guy the love of my life would be with me. And to make matters more hard his wife is awesome. She takes great care of him and thei famly. Am i always gonna be his young side fling???Does anyone think he will actually ever leave her to be with me??? I cant even believe im posting how i feel but my mind needs input from people outside to get some insight. I apprecate any comments good or bad

Wondergirl

If he hasn't left his wife for you in a year and a half, he isn't going to leave her.

And if he cheats on his wife with you and leaves her for you (and even if he doesn't), how soon will he cheat on you?

You are hurting yourself. End the affair and find a man who will love only you. You have too much to offer to stay in a dead-end relationship.

katrina27

o my god. im appalled at you. u are a vile sneaky person.
your poor partner, leave him let him have a life far away from u.
ur lover will never leave his wife. she sounds like a lady.
he is using you for cheap sex. a thrill. i bet he laughs himself to sleep at night thinking of u wasting ur life.
i dont care if i am harsh here.
his sons wil never accept u. theywill despise u, and u will make them hate their father if they ever find out ur dirty secret.
think of the depression u will cause to all involved.
u are a cheap woman, his wife is a lady. ur no competition. ur a homewrecker.
women like u should be taken out into the street, their heads shaved, so all other women know to shun you. and u should be flogged.

shygrneyzs

While Katrina was rough on you, she is right about you in many ways. You are the side show, the one he does not come home to, the one he will never come home to. A man who used staying in the marriage for the sake of the kids is a schmuck, to say the very least. What a poor excuse for a man! To use his children as a smokescreen for his inability to make a decision and leave his marriage. But wait - don't over half of the cheaters say that? They stay because of the children? Gimme a break already! And you believe it. Shame on you too.

You have a bf - at least be honest with him and tell him you are having a sexual relationship with a married man. He will do himself the best favor by leaving you.

Actually, you and your married lover do deserve each other. Neither one of you has the morals to be honest with your partners and stand on your own two feet in the relationship. You both hide behind other people. You both use your partner's trust to your advantage.

If you really want to know if you two will be together forever - tell him no more sex until you see the signatures on the divorce decree, certified by the clerk of court. Have some self respect.

ordinaryguy

Yup.
Nope.
My advice: Leave both your married lover and your cuckolded boyfriend and live alone for at least a year, preferably two, and decide who you really are.

Fr_Chuck

No you will not always be his young side thing, at some point you will start getting older, maybe gain some weight and he will merley move on and find a new younger thing, That is how cheating goes, his wife gets the best, his side thing is merley the fun.

And of course your boyfriend deserves alot more and better also.

talaniman

Here we go again. Yes you are the young thing on the side. Yes thats all you will ever be. Yes you fell for his line. Yes, your an idiot. Yes, I hope the truth hurts, enough to make you change

simoneaugie

They sound harsh. If it were legal, you could be second wife. ordinaryguy has the perfect idea. Quit confusing yourself, and messing with both of their hearts, and yours. Live alone, get to know yourself.

friend4u178

Yes here we go again.............I think its time we start working on a template that we can just paste into these " I'm with a married guy" posts.

talaniman

We need two templates, one for questions like this one, and another for the ones that finally see the light, and truly like to change.