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I will be 19 years old in 3 weeks and I've been obsessed with getting pregnant. I've been wanting a baby since I was 16. Sometimes I look at my stomach and pretend I'm pregnant. I put myself in some fantasy world. I'm just wondering if this has happened to any other person and how I can deal with this. I don't want to go out with someone just to get pregnant. I would never trick someone into getting pregnant. I know I'm still young and I should just wait till it comes along and I am. I just want advice on how I can deal with it until the right time comes for me.
Recently one of my friends have fallen pregnant, I am delighted for her but also a little jealous.
Same here. I have 3 friends that just had a baby. 1 in may, 1 in june and one just a few weeks ago. and possibly 2 others are pregnant. Also, my brother just had a baby. she's 1 month and a half. I see all these people have babies lately and because of my period problems I feel like I can't have kids. I probably could someday but not the way I am right now. Plus I want to wait a few years. I just find it hard to cope with how I'm feeling. I've even started making baby blankets lately. I gave some to my niece but I kept a few for myself you know. Even at christmas I bought a baby outfit for my niece and I wanted to keep it for my future baby but I thought that would be a little too crazy and did in fact give it to my niece like I planned in the first place.
ok seroiusly, you NEED to stop lashing out at everyone who doesnt sit here and "poor baby" you and give you an instant pill to cure it. Everyone who has posted, has tried to help you. This isnt just a medical advice site, it is an ADVICE site all around. If you dont want the advice, don't take it. end of story. but DONT lash out at the people who care enough to reply and help you, like J9. you dont know how she feels, you dont know her expereinces. it is so easy to sit back and judge, when you havent been there yourself. well, most of the people have already been where you are. you AREN'T the only ones who feel like this. I wanted a baby since I was 10 years old. I wanted it so badly, there were times I felt I would do anything to have one. BUT I didnt. I knew I wasnt ready (I know I know, you keep telling us you know you arent too. I'm not talkign about that) Instead, I took a step back, and looked at my feelings, and why I felt the need for a baby so strongly.there were things that happened to me in my past that cause me deep pain, and a deep feeling of unworthiness. I felt, that should I have a baby, I would be able to give the child the things that I didnt feel myself. make that child feel like the most wonderful blessed person in the world, with the highest respect for themselves. and in return, I would have the love that I so longed for. I thought about that and I realized that a child wouldnt give me what I needed. what I needed was only something I could give myself. to give that child such a duty when first ocming into life, would be cruel. It didnt stop my hunger for a child, it didnt stop me from crying every night for want of one. but you know what? it gave me purpose. It helped me fight to make myself a better person, I was a very responsible kid for my age. I used my time taking care of children in every way that I could. baby sitting, school, offering my time. I sucked it up, and did what I could with life. I didnt sit there and feel sorry for myself anymore. I made the best of what time I had, until I could have a kid. And finally I met a wonderful man, we fell in love, and I knew that it was finally my turn. And let me tell you, jsut because you have a child, doesnt mean you ever get rid of that feeling of wanting more. That never goes away. when you are done having kids, your kids have kids, and you settle for being a grandparent. You just CHANGE your perspective. and take enjoyment in different ways. Perhaps you are spending too much time around kids, and its just fueling your hunger. I dont know. All I know, is you need to suck it up, and MAKE it better. NO ONE can make it better for you, ESPECIALLY if you are determined to not allow it. (as you have already proved on this site) This is something you need to look at for yourself. You need to sit down and figure out WHAT it is that makes you so hungry for that baby. then you need to find ways to make it work, until you can have one. There is no use sitting around and moping about not having a kid of your own, and trying to make other hurt ebcause they already have kids, and couldnt possibly know what you are talking about. that is such a selfish attitude. If its a pity club you want, go start one. otherwise, make your life good, and stop moping. think about the other good things in life, like a man. when you finally find a guy that you want to be with forever, he is just gonna feel like a peice of meat needed to have what you really want. And if you can't ever have kids? there is adoption. you know how many kids are out there that crave parents? that wonder if they will ever have the oportunity to have a REAL family? but dont even consider it, if you will just make those kids feel less loved, because they arent you :Real: kids. I am sure you will have plenty of bitter things to say back to me about this, so i'll sign off so you have time to write back.
Ok, first off. I just wanted to know how I can deal with wanting a child so badly when I know I don't want to have one for another few years. I didn't ask for someone to tell me I wansn't ready to be a parent or to know how hard or easy it was for you and I definetly didn't ask for your pitty. I just wanted to know how to deal with it.
I gave my suggestions. It was not necessarily you who we were talking about.
It was citygirl who was so quick to judge and lash out at people. Not you.
I gave my suggestions, because this is how I deal with it. You see, even though I am 42 and have had 4 children, I still feel the same way you do. I have never grown out of it.
So, understand it was citygirl who was being hateful, not you.
Mocha, there are other ways of clearing things up than using an accusing attitude, which you did.
See, this is why people take offense. It is the way things are worded. Since we cannot make eye contact, and we can't read body language, we have to be careful in the way we word things.
ACTUALLY you DID ask how hard or easy it was, as you were asking if anyone else had ever felt the same way that you were feeling. People have given you their opinions, people have told you how we have felt the SAME way, and HOW WE DEALT with it. instead of taking what advice was given, whether you wanted it or not, this whole thing has been turned into a huge discussion, and arguement.as far as I am concerned, none of the answers are appreciated anyways. This is the last time I am posting on this particular posting, as it has gotten far too out of preportion, and far too personal to many people.
I did read the advice and have taken it into consideration but what works for you might not work for me. That is why I'm open to everyone's suggestion. Who said I have to agree with everything everyone sais. I am just saying my opinion. If you think i don't appreciate it then you shouldn't have come here because you got it all wrong.
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