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I dont' know if I want the father to be the part of my baby's life?
Hi,
I'm having some trouble. This is my first pregnancy and my boyfriend and I just broke up. He hasn't had a job since I've known or have been dating him. He is an alcoholic, lives off unemployment, doesn't look for a job or anything. Plus, he already has a daughter that he can't even support right now. We got into a really bad argument on the phone last night and he said he wanted me to have an abortion even though I'm not going to. He said he didn't even want the baby, but if I kept it, he would want to be a part of his/her life. I want to try to get full custody of my child when that day comes, but I wonder if they would allow it. I've seen how he doesn't even watch over his own daughter, and well, and I hate to see what he would do with our child. I'm a very responsible person, who as my stuff together, has a fantastic job, new car, new house, good financial stability. I'm just wondering if the courts would rule in favor for me if I needed to go court? Or is there another plan that I should take in this situation? Please help.....
WOW didnt realise this would cause such a stir - all i did was give my advice - agree with me or not.
All i did was advise what i would do in that situation beacsue i have been there!!!!!
Isnt this site for advice ScottGem????? We arent all experts but we all have had life experiences!
Calm down
Just want to point out that nobody expects professional advice, but deceit, lies, and illegal advice, is not welcome, and thats the point, so don't jump on those who are at least trying to keep the standard high for ALL of us.
WOW didnt realise this would cause such a stir - all i did was give my advice - agree with me or not.
Isnt this site for advice ScottGem????? We arent all experts but we all have had life experiences!
First, I am calm. Second, yes this site is for advice, but the regulars here take pride in the quality of the advice given. Finally, what I did was simply disagree with your advice as you point out I can. The main problem here was not your advice (though, IMHO it was a problem), but in lacey's misinterpretation of my response and subsequent refusal to accept the facts.
I'm having some trouble. This is my first pregnancy and my boyfriend and I just broke up. He hasn't had a job since I've known or have been dating him. He is an alcoholic, lives off unemployment, doesn't look for a job or anything. Plus, he already has a daughter that he can't even support right now. We got into a really bad argument on the phone last night and he said he wanted me to have an abortion even though I'm not going to. He said he didn't even want the baby, but if I kept it, he would want to be a part of his/her life. I want to try to get full custody of my child when that day comes, but I wonder if they would allow it. I've seen how he doesn't even watch over his own daughter, and well, and I hate to see what he would do with our child. I'm a very responsible person, who as my stuff together, has a fantastic job, new car, new house, good financial stability. I'm just wondering if the courts would rule in favor for me if I needed to go court? Or is there another plan that I should take in this situation? Please help.....
im going through the same situation. Do what you think is right for you and the baby. Look into some legal advice.
Well everyone is entitled to an opinion - while lies and deceit is not usually the best way to go about it.
In this case it is! IN MY OPINION!
And it is my opinion that its not. It could come back to haunt if the father ever finds out the truth. And how are you going to explain it to the child when he gets old enough.
well i have been told if he is not on the birth certificate, and you do not want child support then its not very easy for him to try to take you to court to get to see her. if he does he will have to pay child support and they will make him get a job.. but also he will have to pay the 600.00 for the paternity test and being he is on unemployment he may as well not bother.. i went with my baby's father when he was trying and get custody to get child support and they are not very nice to men here. but it sounds like your man is as rotten as mine was. at least he didn't accuse u of being with someone else or being pregnant with another man's child. some men just do not grow up girl and i am sorry but if he is not trying to get a job now to take care of his responsibilities i don't think he ever will. some men change when they see the baby but advice people have given me is just to find someone else and leave him alone. if he does sign baby birth certificate u can get child support and they will MAKE HIM GET A JOB and when he does not pay he will go to jail.. the choice is yours but i would not worry too much. he has no money to take you to court =)
The actions of family courts vary widely. So how you were treated in one jurisdiction doesn't necessarily hold true in other places, even within the same state.
Child support and visitation issues are generally held separate. So its certainly possible for a parent to get visitation without paying support and vice versa.
The main issue here is if the OP can be forced to list his name and if she leaves his name off, what will he have to do to obtain rights. This issue has been discussed in the many other posts in this thread.
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