Hi,

I am 23 years old girl.Its been 5- 6 months I got into a relationship and in Jan we ended up making love.I am totally new to this and have no idea about sex or dates or anything at all.My boyfriend says he has some knowledge but i am not at all confident bout his knowledge.By now we wud have had sex like a 20 times and I AM TOTALLY SCARED IF I WILL GET PREGNENT.I dont even know what to do if i get pregnent,the mental tension is killing me and making me arrogant towards him.I do not want to have sex before marriage and it is not planned but some times we end up having sex.As i do not want to appreciate sex before marriage I dont even feel like asking him to use a condom and motivate him.
I have heard tat during periods 7 days the eggs will be active and we sud avoid sex is tat so? And on Ask me just now i read about some new thing like Ovulation,which has now made me totally confused and sad.

So please tell me how to take care and avoid getting pregnent? Which are the days i Need to be carefull and avoid sex? which are the days i can have sex? Please help me with a proper answer I am mentally stressed out and disturbed as i do not have any knowledge about this topic.

Please help.

buggage

darhe3425 if these are the only methods you are using,and unless you are very lucky, you're going to end up with a pregnancy on your hands.not everything you read on the internet is true.the only thing I saw for the aloe vera and lemon was to help in soothing stds. so unless she's got issues with stds already, and wants some minor relief, this information is not much help.and talking about the vitamin c thing, taking high doses of vitamins can be dangerous and should always be discussed with a doctor before hand. Also, from my searching on the subject, it doesnt keep the sperm from fertilizing the egg. It simply makes the uterine environment too hostile for an egg to survive, thus terminating the pregnancy. and its very important to know that this is simply an unknown, and unscientifically proven "herbal remedy" and I would definitely not suggest this to people as a means of solving " pregnancy issues". the posters issues of main concern here were the facts that she could stand up to her man and make him wear condoms etc, and was afraid to get pregnant, but was looking for a easy way out, without having to actually take the birth control responsibility. I definitely do not suggest anyone start taking high vitamin doses to prevent/terminate pregnancy, in the hopes of a quick "cure". Its dangerous, and none too smart

ldyastrid

Here's what I see:

You've told him you do not want to have sex before marriage

he agrees to comply

you still end up having sex ... so how committed to your stance on no sex before marriage are you... really?

You are committed to eachother and are going to get married, but you are afraid if you don't give in he'll feel bad or get depressed... so it's out of obligation to what that you have sex?

If you are uncomfortable talking about ANYTHING ... and this seems to be a really important thing ... then you aren't ready to get married... you are setting yourself up to do whatever he wants for fear that he will be sad.... he's a big boy - deal with it! Not getting what you want is a part of life! If he becomes depressed or wants to end it with you because of your views on premarital sex... you really don't want to marry this guy anyway!

He doesn't seem to care too much about how having sex is effecting you... but then, if you give in, you must want it too. If he's agreed but persists anyway, how is that respecting you or your decisions?

I'd think about your true feelings about things and how you want to be treated based on your beliefs - if someone is disrepectful of your beliefs and convictions, why have them in your life?

This is a time bomb just waiting to go off... I certainly hope a child isn't a product of this union that's doomed for failure!

darhe3425

Actually, they are called informed decided parents.

lindsayminar

Obviously there is more going on in your relatioship then what you are telling us. You shouldn't be having sex unless you really really want to. Also it sound like he is pressuring you in to having sex with him, that is not normal or healthy. It doesn't sound like you know a whole lot of english.

This relationship makes me very nervous because you say that you are 100% committed to each other and are deffinately going to get married. Also that you don't want to ask him to use a condom because you dont want him to think you want to have sex before your married. and you dont see any problem with this?

I have a funny feeling that you have been through trauma as a child, or are in a very controlling relationship. I know you probably won;t listen to me. But i think that you should go and talk to a doctor about your relationship, birth controll, and possibly counseling.

Please get help for youself!

darhe3425

First I would seek some counsel with a Planned Parenthood agency to get informed about how should begin to take control of your reproduction, and gain discussions about when and how you will seek sexual intercourse. It is difficult for young women in their 20's and even 30's to take control of thier sexual health. I do recommend you read: Child bearing Year by Susan Weed, it's a book I think all women should have.