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My baby's father is giving me hell because I won't name the baby after him, but im being nice enough to choose to give him his last name, because I am 6 months pregnant and he hasnt given me a single dollar since I been pregnant. hes been on and off jobs, he hasnt provided for anything I dont even live with him, and I havent put him on child support, I dont even want him to sign the birth certificate but he wants to make my life miserable i dont know what to i dont even want him in my life but i dont wanna keep him out of the babys life.
I have to agree with you are the one who will be going through the 9 months of your body not being your own, and then having to push the baby out. I'm going through a divorce right now, and I am 30 weeks pregnant. The baby will have MY last name, no matter what the father says. Also he can not force you to put his name on the birth certificate. He would have to prove that he is the father through the court first. Hope this helps.
When my ex husband and I had kids we gave them both surnames, double barrelled. It made it easier when we divorced (I always think ahead lol!) as neither of us have a different surname to the kids, even though we have diofferent surnames to each other. As for naming baby after him, why should you? If he has a name you dont like, or wouldnt want to name your child, then dont call him that! He cant force you to, and making your life difficult will just make his own more difficult when baby is born as it will be used againt him! Just tell him straight you are naming baby, you have to carry it and give birth, you should have the right to make that decision. You should file for child support, he has a legal and a moral duty to provide for his child whatever happens. Its not 'getting' him, its providing the best life for the child you both created. That can only be a good thing, and any father worthy of the title would happily make sacrifices for their child, and play an active role in their life. There are steps you can take to limit his access, I did with my husband and we were married. In our divorce I applied for full custody and complete control over his access to them, and I got it. Dint get me wrong, like you I never wanted him out of their lives, they have the right to see their dad even if he doesnt have the right to see them! But at least this way there is no possibility of him trying to get custody or threatening it, he never has, but I wouldnt take the chance! It does depend where you live though, I would speak to a lawyer about the rules in your area. Good luck.
You know, though statistically it's hard to say, at least he's showing interest in being a father. First off, you get to name the baby. He has no say. As far as last names go, a hyphenated last name can solve lots of legal problems. Try and include him in the child's life, at least until he proves himself to be unfit. Remember, he IS the dad and, barring him being a total piece of &*$%, he DOES have the right to be a father and since he's showing interest in being so, you should honor him in this. Start learning to compromise, because he probably isn't going anywhere, and compromise will make your life much easier in the long run.
I still say - name this kid whatever you want. It has very little to do with respect for the father. You have already stated you are giving your child his last name - there's the respect - there's the honor.
I still say - name this kid whatever you want. It has very little to do with respect for the father. You have already stated you are giving your child his last name - there's the respect - there's the honor.
Yes, and I told him that I can have chose to just put my last name because we are going to have both last names in there, and he is still argueing about the first name and its making me not want to even give my baby his last name, he has not done anything for me and if he really did care about me and the baby he would have been there for me throughout my pregnancy instead he stresses me out and just wants everything his way and thats how its been this whole 6 months
Sadly we have to remember no matter who does all the work or who deserves this or that the fact remains that maybe she can just put her last name, but once he proves he is the father legally he will have the right to turn around and petition the court to have it changed to his last name. In most courts they would do just that, change it to his. So really it comes down to a matter of the law.
Give the baby both last names and the first name that you have chosen. You have then compromised enough that you can look at the father and say. "When you carry it for nine months you can name it, until then kiss my arse." At least that is what I would do.
as i said before he verbally abuses me and he HAS put his hands on me he has anger issues and i dont feel safe with him. i dont know what he is capable of. its not a matter of who deserves what its a matter of what can happen with someone like him. i am not trying to have a battle with him. i am still giving him the chance to see his son and be there if he wants to, but i dont want him signing any papers.
Then don't put him on the birth cert. He will then have to prove that he is the father. If you truely fear him then you need to contact someone and seek out legal help with this. Most of us don't know the laws in fl. My best advice is to call the local courthouse and get the number for legal aid.
thank you very much. That reply I stated on here before this one was actually to someone that had placed their reply on here yesterday, but I guess she deleted it. but thank you.
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