I haven't told anyone about this....if I had a baby now id would be so unhappy. I don't have the money or the time kto put into it.....same with my bf....we are not married yet, we are takin things one step at a time, if we had a baby it would screw up our plans. ya know? well if I turn out to be pregnant I'm considering an abortion....any words of advise???? should I juts have the abortion and not tell anyone, should I discuss it with him and just take the chance??

J_9

You need to discuss it with him. This is his child too.

Abortion is by no means a method of birth control. How about adoption?

If it were not for adoption my wonderful in-laws would have no children, I would not have children since my in-laws adopted my husband.

There are other options available besides abortion. Abortion is not painful physically, but is painful emotionally.

This sounds harsh, but is reality.

You will remember for the rest of your life that you killed an innocent baby, a baby that did not ask to be conceived. You will grieve, you will remember that particular day every day for the rest of your life.

Pregnancy is something one must consider when deciding to have sex. The only thing that is 100% effective in birth control is abstinence.

I bring my children up to face the consequences of their actions, as most parents do. Now it is time to face the consequences.

Discuss it with your boyfriend, your parents and his parents. Please make an informed decision.

Depressed in MO

Depends on what state you live in as to whether or not you can legally even get an abortion.
It's not typically something I would discuss openly with a lot of people as you will get answers like "You are killing a baby" and so on and so forth, etc...
A lot of people feel this way, but there are also a lot of people out there who believe that a woman has the right to choose.
Please check out www.plannedparenthood.com for some extra resources in helping you make your final
decision.
You should discuss this with your current boyfriend, but please do not let him influence you into doing anything you are unsure that you want to do.

Best of luck.

shygrneyzs

If you had a baby now you would be so unhappy.... so if you are pregnant, you will choose to terminate the life of the unborn child... I think I read that right. If you are not prepared mentally, physically, financially, to assume responsibility for your actions - and I think I am reading that you are not - it is a shame that an unwilling, unsuspecting baby has to pay the consequences. Birth control is free - any public health will give you some. They even have condoms there that they will give out. You want to be an adult in bed, then act like an adult in other areas and protect yourself.
If you are pregnant, yes you have the right to make the choise for an abortion - does your state allow abortions? There are other options such as having the child and placing the child for adoption. But it is your decision. I do not feel sad for you, but I do feel for the possible child.

J_9

This girl is on the pill.

I am pro-choice.

However, a person in my family did have an abortion and I see the emotional toll yearly on the day that the abortion was carried out and also on the date that the baby should have been born.

I just want her to make the right decision and to be informed about all of the decisions out there.

LUNAGODDESS

I am totally bias when it comes to issues of abortions...today I have two couples that want children and cannot have any...one is adoptioning...and what I understand there are many couples and single women wanting a child...please consider the needs of these people before a decision is made...contact a family lawyer and or an adoption agency ....or and speak to your pastor.... look and make a serious effort in your state or province to find out information about adoption and hopefully they will give you an alternative to abortion...make some one's life a happy one by giving them the opportunity to rise your child...please do not give up on hope...consider adoption...

unsure84

I am on birthcontrol!! I haven't miss a single day or hour in nearly 8 years! and we do use protection....that is why I am so flustered with the situation....how is it possible if i do all the things to prevent. I am and adult, and I am talking responsibility for my actions but I do not feel it is fair to bring a person into this world that I can not give 100% too.

J_9

It is called "birth control" not "birth prevention" The only thing that is 100% is abstinence.

No, it is not fair bringing a person into this world that you cannot give 100% attention to, you should have thought of that before. Now it is too late.

But there are people out there who would love to give 200% to a child, but they can't have any.

Consider giving happiness to someone who would otherwise not have any.

SINGLE4

This is a very contriversial subject. However... I am Pro-Life. I do have friends that have had abortions and down the road, they regret their decision. This is your own flesh and blood you are talking about.

I got pregnant at the age of 17 and abortion wasn't an option for me. I told myself that if I was that irresponsible to have unprotected sex then I needed to pay the consequences and this child is innocent. Believe me... I was young and definately thought I was not ready to be a mom. I was in college and was having a good time. Needless to say, I don't regret having my daughter. I could have given her up for adoption but I wouldn't be able to live with myself either if I did that! (Even though I do believe in adoptions. There are many people out there that can't have children and want them. Then there are people out there that just because they "aren't ready" decide to abort.)

I had my child, married the man that got me pregnant and the marriage ended after 5 years. I married him because I got pregnant. I was young and dumb.

Do I have any regrets having my daughter... HELL NO! She is the best thing that ever happened to me! She keeps me honest!

If you are persistant about not wanting this child then carry the child for nine months and give him/her up for adoption. This baby deserves a chance at life!

J_9

I am pro choice because I believe we should have to choice to do with our bodies whatever we wish. Do I believe in abortion? Under certain circumstances, yes. Others, no.

I am so very happy that my husband's birth parents gave him up for adoption. They were college students from Russia here in the U.S., who were involved in an arranged marriage. The money and marriage would
have ended had the families back in Russia knew that there was premarital sex.

The couple that adopted him are the best people in the world. He has 2 sisters and one brother. All were adopted except for the oldest sister.

His parents wanted a large family, preferably 6 or more children. After the eldest was born his mother had 15 miscarriages in the span of 2 years. It was devestating, but they began to adopt children who were unwanted pregnancies.

They are the most loving and wonderful people that I have ever met in my life.

Please consider giving your child a wonderful wealthy life like was given to my husband.