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Home > Family & People > Personal Growth   »   Is it normal to need CONSTANT re-assurance?

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Old Mar 2, 2009, 02:36 PM
martina59
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Is it normal to need CONSTANT re-assurance?

I seem to be going through some sort of "mid-life crises" where I'm not only peri-menopausal, but it seems I need constant re-assurance in everything I do, say, think, respond to, etc............
Am I loosing maturity, being overly sensitive,?? I've pretty well lost my passion for what I do, yet I know I'm where I'm meant to be, but just so darn confused!!!

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Old Mar 2, 2009, 02:44 PM   #2  
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I think many people go through something similar from time to time. I know I have moments where I think I should have it more together at my age than I do....
Hormones might be part of it, any sort of stress can add to it....some people get a bit of the "is this all there is?" syndrome as they get older.
Maybe think about doing something completely different.....try a new activity, join a group, take a class on something that interests you just for fun, start an exercise routine, etc.. Spending some time with friends and family may help....or the opposite, perhaps plan a weekend retreat all by yourself.
Certainly if things continue or you start to feel more out of sorts, a checkup at your doctor's might be in order.
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Old Nov 3, 2009, 11:44 AM   #3  
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i am 58 and in the clast 4 months i went through this transformation. I became very insecure in my marriage with just about everything. i to needed constant reasuring. But all of a sudden I lost 45 lbs started fixing my self up like I did when I was in my 20s. I have lost all interest in my home , yard my crafts. Now I just get up get my self together and go. I still have some insecurities regarding my husband, but i also have a plan in mind i know what i am going to do if i find out that he has cheated, so that makes life for me a little easier. Also he never was one for complements which bothered me before but not now. I get all the attention from others when I am out. NO I HAVE NOT MET ANYONE ELSE. I am starting to realize that I AM OK. I think when we get to a certain age our imortaliy sets in. We look in the mirror and see our parent and realize that we are where they were. We also know there are prettier younger girls out there that may be appealing to our spouse because all we see is ourselves getting older and more wrinkls. It is so hard to get past this, buteach day whether you want to or not fix yourself up makeup and all and get out of the house for awhile. Believe me in time you will say to yourself I am OK. Good Luck hope this helps you.
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Old Nov 4, 2009, 07:14 AM   #4  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by martina59 View Post
I seem to be going through some sort of "mid-life crises" where I'm not only peri-menopausal, but it seems I need constant re-assurance in everything I do, say, think, respond to, etc............
Am I loosing maturity, being overly sensitive,?? I've pretty well lost my passion for what I do, yet I know I'm where I'm meant to be, but just so darn confused!!!
Sometimes it is easy to say that because we are menopausal, we do crazy things, or feel differently about ourselves and our lives.

While this may be true to a point, menopausal women also have hot flashes and night sweats, but that in itself doesn't 'cause' a mid life crisis, any more than any other symptoms or effects of menopause.

This lack of confidence, lack of desire for things you normally found rewarding, and feeling lost in life may have to do with other factors.

Please see your Doctor and explain to him/her what you've said here. I'm not a medical doctor, but it is probably a good idea to check out other possibilities, like depression and anxiety issues.
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