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New Member
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Jan 25, 2010, 07:11 PM
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At what age should a child stop calling his dad daddy?
My step-son is 12 years old and still calls his dad "Daddy" non-stop. He will call "Daddy? Daddy? Daddy?" over and over until his father answers him. I have raised two boys (14 and 18) and they had LONG stopped calling their father Daddy by this point in their life. My step-son also has a blanket he can't sleep without, calling it his "kiki" and I am worried that his infantile behaviour is going to become noticed at school as he brings his "kiki" with him to school on the days his "Daddy" is picking him up for the night.
Maybe I'm overreacting, but I think my husband should nip this in the bud before it goes too much father. Boys can't be babies forever.
PS his mom really doesn't help the situation, and actually seems to stunt his and his sisters development by encouraging infantile behaviour, such as drinking out of sippy cups.
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Expert
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Jan 25, 2010, 07:57 PM
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He stops when he wants to, or even if he wants to, it is a somewhat common term here in the south and adult children may call their dad that.
You leave it alone for several reasons
The biggest,it is between him and his dad and it is his choice and should not be anyone's choice but his
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Ultra Member
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Jan 25, 2010, 08:27 PM
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I have a 54 year old son who still refers to me a "Daddy", and he nr I are embarrassed by it.
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Ultra Member
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Jan 25, 2010, 08:36 PM
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I never have been close to my dad, but my mother I still call "Mummy." Then again I'm a 17 year old girl. I only call my dad "Daddy" when he scares me.
Though you are concerned, this is between the father and son. Tell the father of your concerns, but it is not your place to step in
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Senior Member
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Jan 25, 2010, 08:42 PM
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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck
he stops when he wants to, or even if he wants to, it is a somewhat common term here in the south and adult children may call thier dad that.
You leave it alone for several reasons
the biggest,it is between him and his dad and it is his choice and should not be anyones choice but his
Got to spread the rep but couldn't agree more. Commonly used here in England too by adult offspring.
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Full Member
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Jan 25, 2010, 10:50 PM
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It's the same way you train a five yr. old to stop sucking his thumb... leave it up to the other kids in the class to tease him and he will stop on his own.
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Expert
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Jan 26, 2010, 05:34 AM
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Depends on where you live. Here in the deep south of the US, most grown men still call their father's Daddy.
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New Member
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Jan 26, 2010, 02:18 PM
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I'm not in the deep south, I'm in Ontario Canada, and the girls call their fathers "Daddy" on a somewhat regular basis here. No where in Ontario does an adult (or pre-adolescent) male call their father Daddy. They would be more likely as an adult to call him by his first name, which would be a bit shocking. I'm very afraid he is going to be teased relentlessly about it if his school friends catch wind of it. But, I do realize it is between his father and he. If I lived in England or the Deep South I wouldn't be concerned.
I do know that I have watched my 14 year old roll his eyes when the "daddy" thing starts up. "Daddy? Daddy? Daddy?" is a bit tiresome on the nerves for even me, and when I see my own son having a (albeit silent) reaction to it, I know that if my step-sons peers hear it they will not be so silent.
It is like the sucking the thumb in public comment, I would just rather him not have the life-long embarrassment of being "caught" sucking his thumb so to speak. I love him too much.
The sippy cup has to stop, I don't care what you say! Lol
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Emotional Health Expert
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Jan 28, 2010, 02:02 AM
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I agree about the sippy cup, that's a bit much at his age.
My son calls his dad Pops. He calls me mom.
Could it be that he is not aware of a 'comfortable' alternative?
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New Member
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Jan 28, 2010, 02:18 PM
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Daddy?. is OK.
Kiki, Blankie, and Sipi- at twelve, are not OK.
As a stepmother, however, I would leave it alone. As long as his behavior does not affect you or your children, I suggest you let his parents deal with his issues.
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Ultra Member
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Jan 30, 2010, 07:07 PM
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I think it's reasonable to say that he'll stop some of the behaviors quick smart when his peers get wind of it.
I guess you just have to accept that he will be embarrassed by them at some stage, but I doubt it will scar him for life (although if continues with the sippy cup he might! LOL)
Re the 'daddy?', 'daddy?', thing... can't his dad just ask him to stop? I got annoyed just reading it.
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Ultra Member
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Jan 30, 2010, 07:30 PM
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No matter where it is that you live, if this is the only issue that you are having with a boy his age, you should just smile and say "thank you God".
I was 38 when my Daddy died, ten years ago. He is still my Daddy in my my prayers every night. I thank God for having had such a father.
It sounds as if you are the one with the problem with it. If, and when, he gets picked on by it, I'm sure he will be just fine adapting around whatever comes up.
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Pets Expert
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Jan 30, 2010, 07:38 PM
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How long ago did his parents get divorced?
This childish behavior (not the "daddy" part but the sippy cup and kiki part) sound like a last attempt to hold on to his father, some unresolved issues with the divorce and your marriage.
I don't have a problem with the Daddy part at all. I called my father Daddy until the day he died (in German "Vati" but still). The part I'm concerned about is the sippy cup and the blankie. He's too old for that but I'm getting this gut feeling that this has nothing to do with a lack of maturity and more to do with a fear of losing his father, of no longer being his fathers baby or child. Grow up and daddy leaves, that may be the underlying fear. I'm not a psychologist so this is just a guess.
I would really look into counseling for this child, I think there's more going on then you think.
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New Member
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Oct 2, 2011, 06:12 PM
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Infantile behavior in kids is frustrating, but unfortuately there is not much you do about it. I feel your pain, my stepson is 6 and calls my husband DaDa like a 1 year old. Eventually they outgrow it, I can't picture my stepson saying DaDa at his high school graduation party, lol.
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