I have a 16 year old son, he's disrespectful, hateful, foul mouthed and the boundarys we set mean nothing to him. I can't let him disrupt my home any longer and want to throw him out. Is there any way I can get him out of my house legally?

sGt HarDKorE

have him go to a private school, usually less people are violent and such and do drugs (I use to go to a private school). I really dont like my family either, and if i dont usually ventilate my anger. So i just explode on my family sometimes though i think they deserver it sometimes... He needs to find a way to ventilate his anger. Maybe doing a sport or something. mine is breaking things that i dont need anymore, its really fun. understand though that he needs help and is going through a had time. I tell my parents i dont like them which i really feel that i dont but it would be nice if they showed a little more care in me. Just keep trying to get closer and although he will act more mad, it really helps. I would pay to have someone attempt to be close to me. Saddle all i got is like 20 dollars lol. Anyways try that. But no need to desert him. I know how that feels and that makes me more mad. I have known that feeling for 3 years and i would honestly probably not be able to handle life anymore if i was left outside forever. Think about it this way too. He will probably get back into drugs and maybe get violent and hurt someone else with his anger. Maybe have him see another councillor if this one isnt working

TiredinSavannah

Ya know buddy, you may be on to something. I REALLY appreciate the insight from someone in his shoes. I was once a teenage boy...I still remember the battles my step dad and I got into. I just wanted him to love me too. I try so hard with my son, maybe I should just try harder...not ignore him, but just love on him whether he likes it or not. I do really love the kid...he just makes me CRAZY.

sGt HarDKorE

do more stuff together. Nothing is/was more fun to me than to do cool things with my dad. Such as playing basketball together and its really cool when he gets into video games like call of duty. Sadly it has stopped with my dad and that is probably why i don't talk to him at all.

A side note: I know this may seem weird but when you are with your son in a public place, try to be what he wants you to be. Before you are like "Why should i change for him?" Read my example.

Example: I hate going anywhere with my mom, she fights with everyone if its not her way. She gets mad at people who didn't do anything. She really embarrasses me, so i get angry a lot when i'm with her and then a lot of fights occur. My mom never listens to what i have to say either. I will tell her something and she completely zones me out. Then when she does something wrong she blames it on me when i try to tell her. Then she yells at me in the middle of a place. Now i never go out with my mom without a fight. My dad on the other hand doesn't fight with everyone. He doesn't do it for me but he understands that it is embarrassing and things can wait till we are home. I am not sure if i confused you but just kind of respect what your son is feeling. I am myself around my dad and i am not embarrassed to be around him. When i'm with my mom i will walk away from her and ignore her. This would really help him open up to you more. And again hope i didn't confuse you.

boop21197

I know how you feel, I had the same thing with my son, I took him out of pubic school and put him in a school were his behavior is not eccepable, he had to earn points to come home on home visits, if he didn't earn them he didn't get to come home,
I also gave him a choice, he either go to this school or I will turn him over to soical services, I put the ball back in his court, I also when down to the court and talk with them about taking him to court for abuse, so they would put him on a tens warrent, this means that he can go to juv. at any time if he doesn't do what I say.
now you can and there are servel places out there, I don't were you live, but here in va. there is a school called new dominion school, it's in dillwyn va. and they live out in the woods, they have to build they're own place to sleep, they eat and cook outside, there is no ac and there is no heat, there is not elect. there is no running water, they do have shower places own the grows, they can and will put they're hands own your son and bring him down if need be, they are own 500 acor of land that is in the middle of the woods so if anyone tired to run away they will not get far. they have to earn the right to go to school, they have to earn the right to go out on the town with the group, they work them from sun up to sun down. you can go to your search and put in " teenhelp" it should bring up all these school for teens like your son and some of them are free, I never had to pay for any of the school eccept for what my son needed, but they also put them to work so they can earn money to buy what they need, they do not get to keep the money on them, they open an account for them, and only the school can get to the money. you can call the school and have them send you a package about the place 1-804-983-2051. they also have a web site call threesprings.com or newdominionschool.com, there is also a miliary school over in virginia beach that is free. it's a 6 mos. school, and they treat them just like they were in the military. you can also talk with a social worker about this. that's were I started, plus I surf the web to find these places.

startover22

In some areas, they have military schools that you have to volunteer a certain amount of hours and just make sure you can get your kid there and back. This may be something to think about. Ours is about 45 minutes away but i would do it if it came down to it. I am so sorry it isn't easier for you or your family. I really hope it works out for you.
sGt....you really have shed some light on this subject with your age and all, being honest and sweet. Thanks.

sGt HarDKorE

No Problem Glad i could help

kt1205

its your son. you cant just give up and throw him out of your house. you do love him right? he just has some problems that need to be changed. i suggest you get him to go to counciling. have you tried talking to him about all of this?

Mother B

I have a 24 yrs. old who may be finally getting out of the house and I will be so thankful. I am separated from husband for 10 years & have been thru hell with my son. Drugs, legal ldrugs because he is bipolar, going off meds, etc. you name it.

And my son thought he owned this house. He can be abusive. Has punched holes in the walls and I have seen him out of control. Had him taken from the house & he had to be in hospital to get back on meds & in control.

I wish I could give you some solid avice because I have tried everything (you name it). Don't let your son take complete control. I have the same situation.........as long as everyone says yes everything is fine.

I will pray for you.
Sorry not to be of much help except I can sympathize with you.

Ithinkmydadhatesme

Okay so I know alot about this subject as u probaly know from my name!!!!!LOL!
My dad is really like u no.....hes probaly worse.
You say in your post u have another son with some type of disabilty,so im just thinking he probaly needs alot of attenion.
I could be wrong but maybe your son needs some to.
I mean I always do things for my dads atteniton.
His job means as much as your other son!!!
Just try showing your love a bit more!!
please tell me if I healped!!!!
Klye Santana

Rinacakes1991

From reading all of these answers and from personal experience i think were going about it all wrong. My parents have tried everything in the book with me punishing me to the max, taking away all my possesions, kicking me out to give me a dose of "reality", nothing like that is going to work. but what works is not some councler who probaly has more family problems than you do. but sitting down talking to you're son. He's a human being not some puppet that you brought into the world find out whats on his mind and actually put yourself in his shoes.My parents did that and we're doing much better as a whole. you mention he's hateful. does he have reason to be? You say he doesn't abide by you're boundaries well don't make inhuman boundaries. Don't try to control something that doesn't want to be controlled u just add more grief to yourself. And last but not least pray, pray till you can't think of anything to ask god anymore.
-Remeber we all are born selfish but it's up to us as individuals to put the consideration of others first....even if it is our son-