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lm89342 · Oct 20, 2006, 08:29 AM

Dear sir/madam,

I have seen my 16 year old daughter holding hands with her female friend- should I be worried about her sexual orientation?

Thank you

LUis

ScottGem · Oct 20, 2006, 08:43 AM

No. Her sexual orientation is what it is. There is nothing you can do about it so its not something to "worry" about. If you want to talk it over with her, it would be good to maintain lines of communication.

Whatever her sexual orientation is, she is your daughter. Your love for her should not be conditioned on her sexual orientation, intelligence or other personality factors.

KristinaS · Oct 21, 2006, 12:16 AM

I concur with Scot. She is still your daughter no matter what. Just keep loving her. That's your job.

Sentra · Oct 24, 2006, 02:44 PM

If she is choosing to be homosexual and has not told you yet, she may a) still be a little confused about who she is or b) trying to slowly work up the courage to tell you.

And when she does, she could be a little nervous but even more so about your reaction. Be there for her, love her, show her support if/when the time comes she feels no one else will be.

At that age we see 'mom' as our rock; be hers. :)

ScottGem · Oct 24, 2006, 04:01 PM

Originally Posted by Sentra

If she is choosing to be homosexual

Most studies agree that one doesn't "choose" to be homosexual.

Krs · Oct 25, 2006, 01:21 AM

Originally Posted by lm89342

Dear sir/madam,

I have seen my 16 year old daughter holding hands with her female friend- should I be worried about her sexual orientation?

Thank you

LUis

I wouldn't worry.
In any case you love her for who she is. She is your daughter.
Maybe its about time you had a mother and daughter chat about sex, boys etc.

Sentra · Oct 25, 2006, 03:39 AM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

Most studies agree that one doesn't "choose" to be homosexual.

What I really meant was, choosing to accept her sexual orientation. Many can't and live in denial for a number of years.

Sentra · Oct 25, 2006, 06:33 AM

Lol, thanks ScottGem :-D

gansada · Nov 4, 2006, 02:44 PM

WEll for one thing don't be 'concerned' bout her sexual oritation.

Think of it as... how would you feel if she was into yours?
(not to be mean or nun.)

She's your lil' sweatheart, love her no matter what.

Peace!

Hoped i helped!

jody patroine · Nov 4, 2006, 03:58 PM

My advice no it could be a friend thing girls do that sometimes just as a friend thing but if you think its more then I think you should talk to her... if she IS intirested with the same sex well you can't change it the best thing to do would be to support her

Hope I helped
Best of luck:)

ashleysb · Nov 5, 2006, 02:53 AM

Maybe I am wrong, but when does holding hands with a friend have anything to do with sexual orientation? I remember when I was 16, my best girlfriend would come over to stay the night and she slept in my bed. It had nothing to do with being lesbian. I wouldn't be concerned about it. Besides, if she does tell you she is gay, you can only accept or reject, not change her.

talaniman · Nov 5, 2006, 07:50 AM

I have no way of knowing if your daughter is gay or not, but as a father I would love and support the decisions that my kids make and even if they where gay, they still will get 100% percent support from me. Sometimes we don't always like what are children do, but we must always be there for them. Unconditionally!

superdaredork · Nov 14, 2006, 05:55 AM

I don't think that you should b worried.
I have friends that are girls and they both have boyfriends and they hold hands all the time. Its no big deal... They are far from homosexuality. Lol

auntie_ray_ray · Nov 27, 2006, 11:14 AM

Im 18 years old and I'm still in high school. My friends and I always lock arms when were walking and sometimes hold hands when were being goofy. If I were you I really wouldn't take it in to too much consideration unless there are other things she does to make you think other wise. Girls just have that bond with each other. We cry on one anothers shoulders help each other dress in the dressing room and things like that. I've never done these things with my friends in a sexual way. Its always just us girls being girls.

Another thing, If you see her "checking out" other girls that might just be an assumption. Every girl I know always sizes up other girls to see if their prettier or what they've got that I don't. Its always a competition in my high school. You have to have the best hair, the perfect outfit, the "popular" friends and so on.

Lynnengrad · Nov 28, 2006, 02:52 AM

A lot of girls in my age group (which is around your daughters) hold hands, hug, etc etc. all the time, just to show friendship.
You shouldn't be worried about her holding hands with another girl.
She probably does it with all her friends :)

If it turns out that she might be a lesbian or bisexual, don't confront her about it.
It'll make her feel uncomfortable.
It should be her decision whether to come out to you, and it's her decision when.

If/When she tells you, be openminded and accepting of her.
She can't change the way she is, and she's still the same person.

indianangel · Nov 28, 2006, 03:05 AM

Hi

It helps to talk to your daughter if it bothers you. Be open when you communicate with your daughter. Trusted parents are never failed. After all she is your daughter, no matter what. Be polite, be honest, be open and talk to her gently - these would help her to be truthful to you. Do not worry yourself just with assumptions.

rockerchick_682 · May 26, 2007, 04:21 PM

Even if she was a lesbian there's nothing to "worry" about. Who cares? If you love someone you love them, you can't help who you like. It's not a problem to like the same sex, I hate people that think that way. Just cause society says it's wrong doesn't mean it is

MicheleEB · May 26, 2007, 08:23 PM

A while back a good friend of mine came over to study for an exam, we were sitting next to each other and giggling (as girls do) my ex husband came out of the bedroom and saw us... later that night he accused me of having an affair with her, although he never quite understood it I told him that he was being silly and that there was nothing at all between my friend and I except friendship... anyway needless to say we aren't together anymore; the point is... NO holding hands means absolutely nothing :)

beachgurly06 · Jun 20, 2007, 08:43 PM

Originally Posted by lm89342

Dear sir/madam,

I have seen my 16 year old daughter holding hands with her female friend- should I be worried about her sexual orientation?

Thank you

LUis

I know lots of kids these days that hold hands with the same sex but at the same time I would talk to her about her sexuality and if she is a homosexual maybe she will tell you or maybe she is not ready to tell you. As jody said the best thing to do is support her in her decisions.