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Delphina · Sep 24, 2007, 04:00 PM

I'm 15 and my parents just don't seem to notice or care about some stuff but are majorly over-protective on others. For example my mum only lets me watch 1 hour of TV a day because otherwise it will "affect my coursework" but last week I went round my mates house after school and I missed the last bus home because her parents were out and we had been drinking. I completely forgot to phone my parents. In the morning I was walking from my friends house to school when I got a phone call from my mum checking I'd caught the school bus all right because she hadn't seen me leave the house that morning - she hadn't even noticed I hadn't come home. Also I've been disgnosed with depression and I've been cutting for over a 6 months now and my parents haven't noticed. Surely parents are meant to notice things like this? I feel like they don't love me because when my brother (13 years) got slightly depressed because his girlfriend dumped him they were really protective and kind to him for a couple of weeks after. Why don't they notice me and what could I do about it? I don't feel able to talk or confide in them at all.

cpalmist · Sep 24, 2007, 04:12 PM

Originally Posted by Delphina

I'm 15 and my parents just don't seem to notice or care about some stuff but are majorly over-protective on others. For example my mum only lets me watch 1 hour of TV a day because otherwise it will "affect my coursework" but last week I went round my mates house after school and I missed the last bus home because her parents were out and we had been drinking. I completely forgot to phone my parents. In the morning I was walking from my friends house to school when I got a phone call from my mum checking I'd caught the school bus alright because she hadn't seen me leave the house that morning - she hadn't even noticed I hadn't come home. Also I've been disgnosed with depression and I've been cutting for over a 6 months now and my parents haven't noticed. Surely parents are meant to notice things like this? I feel like they don't love me because when my brother (13 years) got slightly depressed because his girlfriend dumped him they were really protective and kind to him for a couple of weeks after. Why don't they notice me and what could I do about it? I don't feel able to talk or confide in them at all.

The path you're walking to get their attention is far more destructive to you than it is hurtful to your parents. Seems like you are giving them a poor return on their trust and are acting out to get their attention in very indirect ways...
Ever think of just going up to one or both of your parents and just telling 'em, 'I need some more of your time to talk - could we go out for a soda or something, just we two?'
I think you'll be amazed at how well they will respond to that - that's what their friends at work/church/school do so the that path is well marked - you simply just have to ask.
Please don't forget that they were kids (I know that seems impossible! As well as criminally insane) at one time - they'd rather hear the truth, good, bad, or ugly, and help you in the best way they can rather than having to damage control and be bailing you out of jail/trying to get your heart started or seeing if they can get your picture on milk cartons next week and stuff.

If you don't ask, you don't get. Easier to ask.

Clough · Sep 24, 2007, 11:06 PM

I really like the ideas of cpalmist above, and I think it would be wise for you to take them to heart and act on them!

baseballmom14 · Oct 2, 2007, 02:31 PM

Originally Posted by Delphina

I'm 15 and my parents just don't seem to notice or care about some stuff but are majorly over-protective on others. For example my mum only lets me watch 1 hour of TV a day because otherwise it will "affect my coursework" but last week I went round my mates house after school and I missed the last bus home because her parents were out and we had been drinking. I completely forgot to phone my parents. In the morning I was walking from my friends house to school when I got a phone call from my mum checking I'd caught the school bus alright because she hadn't seen me leave the house that morning - she hadn't even noticed I hadn't come home. Also I've been disgnosed with depression and I've been cutting for over a 6 months now and my parents haven't noticed. Surely parents are meant to notice things like this? I feel like they don't love me because when my brother (13 years) got slightly depressed because his girlfriend dumped him they were really protective and kind to him for a couple of weeks after. Why don't they notice me and what could I do about it? I don't feel able to talk or confide in them at all.

Please know there should be a support group you can find in your town, start with your family , school counselor or church member, friends family, please reach out to some one. Are you under a doctors care ? Cutting school, drinking is not the answer, sit your parents down one night and be honest with them about how you are feeling, unfortunately sometimes the children are the strong ones.