Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    somerset23's Avatar
    somerset23 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Oct 14, 2007, 04:44 PM
    Immature 14 year old daughter
    This is my first post and I am looking for some advice or a little clarity on something. I have a 14 year old daughter that is very gifted academically, but is extremely immature when it comes to life issues. She is fine socially when we are around other adults and is usually the teachers favorite student. But... when all he friends are watching teenage shows, in her free time, she still listens to silly songs and watches silly cartoons. I would appreciate any help I can get from another parent going through the same thing or a teenager with some wisdom or light they can shed on how I should handle this.
    Thank you.
    Mom looking for answers
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
    Expert
     
    #2

    Oct 14, 2007, 05:00 PM
    It's refreshing isn't it, to know that we have children who are still being children rather than having sex, and doing "adult" type things.

    I have one the same age and am happy to see her playing Webkins on the computer or asking if she can go to a friends house to "play."

    We are lucky in that we are raising our children to be CHILDREN rather than to grow up too early and have life experiences that they should not be having that this age.

    How to handle this? Be happy that you have a child that has not been corrupted by society, that she is still willing and able to be a CHILD.

    Somerset, I thank my lucky stars every day that my daughter still wants to PLAY, that she can be very mature around adults, but has no interest in having a relationship with a boy, although she "likes" boys, playing, studies...

    Just think... we could have daughters who are pregnant, daughters with STDs, etc.

    You have a WONDERFUL daughter, like I do, and I would not change it for the world.
    sGt HarDKorE's Avatar
    sGt HarDKorE Posts: 656, Reputation: 98
    Senior Member
     
    #3

    Oct 14, 2007, 05:10 PM
    Im in 10th grade, and a lot of my friends and people who are not my friends still watch cartoons and such. They watch MTV and VH1, but they still watch cartoons, as its always talked about in class. And what is considered silly songs? Rap? Haha, every teen listens to that for the most part, and as J9 said, why have her be an adult?
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
    Expert
     
    #4

    Oct 14, 2007, 05:41 PM
    TheSavage agrees: the rating says it all -- savage
    Thank you Savage... I know you don't give a rating unless it is deserved.
    letmetellu's Avatar
    letmetellu Posts: 3,151, Reputation: 317
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    Oct 14, 2007, 07:33 PM
    I deal with kids of college age and I find out from them that a lot of them still watch the so called silly cartoons or shows. It is a way for them to relax, be entertained and yet not have to remember a thing about what they watched.
    Xrayman's Avatar
    Xrayman Posts: 1,177, Reputation: 193
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Oct 14, 2007, 08:52 PM
    I am finding this really difficult to understand-Your daughter is 14 (a child), let her be.

    She is academically great-good for her-let her unwind -let her be a child-best wishes to her and you.

    I think you've done a great job-don't spoil it by getting on her case to "grow-up too soon"

    Cheers!
    str82hell's Avatar
    str82hell Posts: 30, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #7

    Oct 14, 2007, 08:55 PM
    My 38 year old room mate watches cartoons. Gifted kids are often socially awkward. I know I am. Its an outlet, a moment you don't have to pretend you emotionally feel like the grownup that your intellect sometimes requires of you. I don't know why they call it gifted, the "gift" comes with a price.
    myadvice4you's Avatar
    myadvice4you Posts: 16, Reputation: 4
    New Member
     
    #8

    Oct 15, 2007, 05:04 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by somerset23
    This is my first post and I am looking for some advice or a little clarity on something. I have a 14 year old daughter that is very gifted academically, but is extremely immature when it comes to life issues. She is fine socially when we are around other adults and is usually the teachers favorite student. But...when all he friends are watching teenage shows, in her free time, she still listens to silly songs and watches silly cartoons. I would appreciate any help I can get from another parent going through the same thing or a teenager with some wisdom or light they can shed on how I should handle this.
    Thank you.
    Mom looking for answers
    I'm 35 and still enjoy the odd cartoon. There is a whole television network devoted to them. Looney Toons, Disney, and other animated films hold a lot of interest with both children and adults. I don't see why it would be weird for her watching them. She's only 14 and some have a brand of humor that some people appreciate.

    If this is your biggest worry about your daughter, then consider yourself lucky.
    Gernald's Avatar
    Gernald Posts: 901, Reputation: 93
    Expert
     
    #9

    Oct 15, 2007, 05:37 AM
    She's 14!!
    I have a friend that's the same way she's 18... thats when you should be worried.
    Anyway, I still watch cartoons and so do a lot of adults, it helps take your mind off reality. Maybe she's stressed out from the enormus amount of pressure that your putting on her to do well academically.
    Pluss... She's still growing up, she dosen't know weather to be an adult or a child---it's an aqward stage.
    Give it some time, she's still a kid. As long as she keeps doing well in school and is respectful to adults who cares??
    charlottethedinosaur's Avatar
    charlottethedinosaur Posts: 15, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #10

    Oct 15, 2007, 04:10 PM
    My 50 year old mom watches spongebob.
    I still watch spongebob.
    Hah,
    I wouldn't be worried.
    Watching cartoons isn't a sign of immaturity,
    She's doing well in school, so she seems responsible.
    And her friends probably watch cartoons too,
    They just might not admit it.
    :]
    FLchickie's Avatar
    FLchickie Posts: 8, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #11

    Oct 15, 2007, 05:26 PM
    Yes I know plenty of seniors in high school that still watch the Disney channel!

    On that note, if you want to be able to relate to her try doing something a little mature where you can still talk to her. Going to the movies and places like that gets parents nowhere. Go get your nails done, or your hair done together! If she likes music take her to a used cd store, etc.
    maddie10's Avatar
    maddie10 Posts: 25, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #12

    Oct 16, 2007, 01:32 AM
    My son is also 14. He also has a 16 year old brother. They both enjoy watching cartoons (and so do I. I'm 37) they are both very immature. But like your are doing very well at school. There both very popular at school and have lots of friends. Instead of going out with there mates they would rather stay in play computer games,watch cartoons. I would count ourselves very lucky. Most teens today are out committing crimes, smoking, drinking. Don't worry as we are the lucky parents.
    cal823's Avatar
    cal823 Posts: 867, Reputation: 116
    Senior Member
     
    #13

    Oct 16, 2007, 06:22 AM
    She's 14! Common.
    14 yr olds are supposed to be like that.
    mahal_kita9's Avatar
    mahal_kita9 Posts: 75, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #14

    Oct 16, 2007, 09:18 AM
    Most kids (at my school anyway) who watch cartoons and act immature are just seen as funny. Not actually "immature" they are the kids everyone wants to be friends with because they are seen as the kids who just want to have fun, and everyone loves that.
    Yeah, everyone watches cartoons. Not a thing wrong with that.
    I'm 15, and whenever I watch TV (which isn't much at all) ill skip back and forth from vh1 to disney channel.
    I hope you're not pressuring her to act more maturely... cause that would only cause more problems.
    Me and my friends sing stupid/silly songs for fun all the time.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
    Uber Member
     
    #15

    Oct 16, 2007, 01:55 PM
    Enjoy that she would rather watch cartoons and listen to silly songs than what the kids nowadays are listening to. At least she isn't following the crowd and laughing at ignorant sexual jokes on brain dead TV.
    Maybe you could try and take a positive approach and use it to your advantage by getting her interested in different types of music like oldies, blues, jazz, reagae, country rock, and so forth. Also maybe rent good family movies you can watch together. Some of my favorite movies that I watched with my kids are Cool Runnings, Uncle Buck, Romancing the Stone, Overboard,

    Even getting her some kid or teen movies would be good too like Camp Nowhere and Save the Last Dance.
    If she still wants to watch cartoons try getting her interested in anime.

    Kids now are so use to what they are all watching and listening to that they have no interest in anything else. They are brainwashed to the Paris Hilton STAR mentality and have no interest in developing their own likes and individuality.


    But what do I know I am 52 and LOVED Toy Story!
    bushg's Avatar
    bushg Posts: 3,433, Reputation: 596
    Ultra Member
     
    #16

    Oct 16, 2007, 06:21 PM
    My 14 year old still watches cartoons, plays in the mud etc... Be happy that your daughter can be herself and is confident enough to still do what she enjoys.
    Ging1994's Avatar
    Ging1994 Posts: 190, Reputation: 9
    Junior Member
     
    #17

    Oct 16, 2007, 07:22 PM
    There's nothing wrong with cartoons I love them :) at least your daughter's not doing anything inapropriate for someone her age like sex
    krys's Avatar
    krys Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #18

    Oct 17, 2007, 06:24 AM
    She is 14. Let her grow up. Let her live her teenage life you only have it once. Don't push her to far cause I know how that feels. But just let her live. GIRLS Want to HAVE FUN
    adama_reign's Avatar
    adama_reign Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #19

    Mar 6, 2012, 11:03 PM
    I am in the same situation. This post isn't about a CHILD still watching cartoons; that was just an example. This post is about a mother, like me, who is worried that her child "just doesn't get it". My daughter is also 14 and lacks any common sense and decision making skills. Of her friends, she is the most niave and "goofy". She says and does things a CHILD her age doesn't, or shouldn't, still do. She acts more impulsively than a child her age should and as stated before her decision making skills are non-existant! She is super sweet and caring. She works extra hard in school, but I worry she works hard in school simply because I make her. Everything she does, is because I make her. When I give her the power to make her own decisions and accept the consequences, such as poor grades, the results are too detrimental or dangerous, so I have to take control over again, like she is 5!

    Our job, as parents, is to make sure we raise children who can function normally, or a mormally as they can in their given situation. It is not only our jobb to keep them safe and loved, tt is our job to make sure we produce a futre viable adult who can contribute to society and provide self- happiness. This mother, and my real concern is that the world is going to leave our child behind...
    adama_reign's Avatar
    adama_reign Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #20

    Mar 6, 2012, 11:04 PM
    I am in the same situation. This post isn't about a CHILD still watching cartoons; that was just an example. This post is about a mother, like me, who is worried that her child "just doesn't get it". My daughter is also 14 and lacks any common sense and decision making skills. Of her friends, she is the most niave and "goofy". She says and does things a CHILD her age doesn't, or shouldn't, still do. She acts more impulsively than a child her age should and as stated before her decision making skills are non-existant! She is super sweet and caring. She works extra hard in school, but I worry she works hard in school simply because I make her. Everything she does, is because I make her. When I give her the power to make her own decisions and accept the consequences, such as poor grades, the results are too detrimental or dangerous, so I have to take control over again, like she is 5!

    Our job, as parents, is to make sure we raise children who can function normally, or a mormally as they can in their given situation. It is not only our jobb to keep them safe and loved, tt is our job to make sure we produce a futre viable adult who can contribute to society and provide self- happiness. This mother, and my real concern is that the world is going to leave our child behind...

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

My 16 year-old daughter. [ 10 Answers ]

This is my first post and I am a little nervous about it. Here is my situation: I am a single mom of 2 girls, they are 13 and 16. I was 17 when I had the first one and have never been mother of the year. I was not an awful mother mind you, it's just that I was very young and had lots of growing...

My 6 year old daughter [ 10 Answers ]

I don't really know how to start this topic as its all very confusing. I am stepmother to a 6 year old girl. When I met her dad he had full custody of both his children(the other is 4) their mother after having their youngest started taking drugs and drinking. It turned out that she has border line...

16 year old daughter [ 3 Answers ]

I live in Vermont. My 16 year old daughter had sex with a 31 year old man last year she is now 17. I tried to file charges. But was told that in vt the legal age of consent is 16.is this true or can I still do something about this.

20 year old daughter [ 3 Answers ]

My daughter is 20 years old and lives at home. She is in university, 3rd year. We pay for her university, books, food, etc. She is a good student has always worked and pays for her extras. (clothes, going out with friends, and savings.) She is always been a great daughter and her father and I...

I have a 2 year old daughter and her father has not seen her in over a year. [ 3 Answers ]

I have a 2 year old daughter and her father left me when she was 5 months old and the last time he saw her was 2 weeks before Christmas 2006, he and I were never married. He knows where she is and how to get ahold of me and see her, but has failed in trying to contact me or see her. I do not have a...


View more questions Search