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    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Jun 15, 2008, 05:20 PM
    How to get my mama to say yes
    Im a 26 yr old college grad... well my old college buddy(a girl) asked me to go with her to a goodie mob concert. I want to go but I do not know how to get my mom to let me. She's very overprotective(I can't swim because she wouldn't let me take lessons at the rec center because "the white people would drown me) and VERY crazy (read my knife wielding mama post).

    Im afraid she won't let me because its in the city and ill have to spend the night with my friend so she doesn't have to drive me back home so late. The concert is free so my mom nor I will have to fork over any money. My question is can I get some advice from you parents on how to ask her in a way that you guys would think my mama will say yes to(im very aware that as an adult I could just leave no matter what she says but out of respect for my mother I try to obey her wishes no matter how crazy until I can move).
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Jun 15, 2008, 05:25 PM
    Not sure what county you live in, or what is your nationality, since cultues vary a lot as to what is allowed.

    In the US, at 26 years old, if you want to go, you go, you don't need anyone's permission.
    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #3

    Jun 15, 2008, 05:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck
    not sure what county you live in, or what is your nationality, since cultues vary a lot as to what is allowed.

    In the US, at 26 years old, if you want to go, you go, you don't need anyone's permission.
    Like I said I live with her (still looking for a job to move out) so I kind of have to respect her wishes don't I?? :confused: I live in the us in the south my mama just is crazy and overprotective she got mad because I wanted to stay at my friends house past 100 am (it was 10 min away from my home) she's nuts (look at knife wielding mama post) so I'm trying to be respectful until I can move out (I wish I could find a job no one seems to be hiring)
    jillianleab's Avatar
    jillianleab Posts: 1,194, Reputation: 279
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    #4

    Jun 15, 2008, 05:54 PM
    It's nice that you want to respect your mother and go about this in a way which won't make her feel uncomfortable. As an adult, you can go if you want, without her permission, but you know that already.

    My suggestion is not to ask her, but tell her you are going. This can be done in a nice way; inform her of your plans for that weekend as if you were telling her about a book you just finished. Be firm, but respectful, and tell her all the details. Make sure you lay out who you are going with, when you are going, and when she can expect you home. This makes you appear much more as an adult; you aren't seeking her approval, you are being courtous of the person you share a home with.

    When I still lived at home my mom had a rule that I could do whatever I wanted (once I was of legal age), but she still had to know where I was, who I was with, and when I'd be home. That way if I decided to stay the night at my boyfriend's, she wasn't up all night thinking I was dead in a ditch somewhere. It satisfied her need to make sure I was safe, but gave me the freedom I needed as an adult.

    I haven't read your other post, but if your mom is really crazy, this still might not go over well. But it's still important that you establish yourself as a functioning adult. She might need extra reassurance that you'll be OK, but stick to your guns, you need to show her you can do these things on your own and nothing bad happens.

    Good luck.
    TwinkletOes26's Avatar
    TwinkletOes26 Posts: 182, Reputation: 2
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    #5

    Jun 15, 2008, 09:41 PM
    Good news guys she said "i was grown" and but she would be "praying that the lord shows me that concerts are ungodly and sinful"
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
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    #6

    Jun 15, 2008, 10:14 PM
    (chuckle) As a parent myself, I can honestly admit... we are weird.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #7

    Jun 15, 2008, 11:28 PM
    Go to the concert, enjoy yourself and find a way to get on your own!
    Your mom is way too over protective and controlling.
    You can't let her run your life.

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