Help with adult child who is disrespectful and not appreciative
I am actually writing this for my husband, because I think the responses may help him. I feel that he needs outside opinions. My step-daughter is 21 years old. After high school, my husband paid for her to go to college. She skipped her classes, moved in with a guy and lied about it. After claiming to see the error of her ways, he paid for her to go to an even more expensive school that she said she could do better at. Once again, she flunked out and did not live on campus. This entire time she lied about where she was living and that she was attending classes. The conversations between them when any actual topic arises are horrible on her part. If he asks her any question about money, school, her living situation, she would scream at him and start talking ugly about him and I both. She blew a nice junk of money by doing that with the two colleges, which she never seems to realize at all. Currently, she is working, and he is paying all her bills. (car, insurance, phone, gym) She is still living with the guy (who doesn't bring in any income, and she will not even tell her father where she lives), and she says she has no money left for her bills. When he talks to her about her needing to pay them herself, she screams at him that he only gives her a certain amount etc. Then she goes into trash talking us both again. This is the type of thing that goes on any time he mentions money at all to her. After one of these conversations, where she screams to the point that they get off the phone, he then spends hours texting back and forth taking up for himself and me to her. Please give him your thoughts on what he should be doing differently.
Comment on ITstudent2006's post
Thank you all so much for your responses.. and yes, I have sat him down and talked to him... I completely agree with everything you guys are saying... For the record, I am not at all blind to what is going on or needs to be done.. however, my husband can