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I really dont know what to do so if anyone can help or offer reassurance I would be so greatful
I am a mum of 14 month old daughter, our only child, and she has had a really bad temper since she was about 6 or 7 months old, though in the last few months its become extreme. She has a normal tantrums in the day though when it comes around to going to bed all hell breaks loose. Unless I lay down with her - downstairs on the sofa as it doesnt work in her bed, she wont go to slepp or stay asleep if we do manage to get her off to sleep.
She thrusts her body around really hard, bangs her head on cot edge or wall or us, hits us and herself, screams at the top of her lungs until her voice is hoarse, pulls her hair, bites...you name it it is there.
I have been in tears recently for a number of reason - no sleep for months as she is up all night long unless in our bed in which case we cant sleep ourselves then, also I am worried that there is something wrong with her as everyone keeps saying they have never seen a baby of this age like it, Im scared of her hurting herself - she managed to throw herself from the cot the other night so we have put a bed guard up and made it into a bed - as its a cot bed its very low down though still this hasnt helped.
ive tried cuddling her in bed, offering her water and juice, holding her hand sitting in her room, getting her to sleep on the floor on a mattress as health visitor suggested, leaving her to cry though all these make it worse.
We have asked the health visitor and she suggested mattress on the floor and leave her to cry either on that or in the cot though neither worked. They basically said that the temper didnt exist as 1 year olds dont have bad tempers though I know different! Ill book an appointment with the doctor tomorrow - she has had all her check ups and the last one being only a week ago (heart and hip and chest) which everything was fine. What other medical causes? something really bad? Thats something Im worried about.
Myself and my husband dont tend to argue in front of our daughter though I must admit there have been a few times where we have started too what with lack of sleep, though in the main do try not to. I usually take our daughter to toddler groups about three mornings a week and try to get her outside when its not too cold or wet. The other day we went to a farm parm and she ran around with her cousin resulting in her actually falling aslee in her bed without temper...for two hours then woke up and tempers started again.
She has a bed time routine with sitting with us looiking at books or jigsaws or something quiet whilst cbeebies is on then she actually says 'teeth' after that so she knows the routine - we take her to do her teeth, then try to cuddle with her to read a book in her bed though tempers usually start then. She has a bath every other night usally though bathtimes she gets very excited so it doesnt seem to make a difference to her sleep time.
We have always made sure that she knows if we are going on the fe occasions i have left her with my mum or sister and usually she will cry and scream though not for long - as soon as they have her amused she is ok they tell me.
I will try that though I dont know whether it will work well with her temper tantrums being so bad??
You are helping so much - everyone is who has replied and thank you to everyone. mum2five - it is so reassuring to talk to someone who knows exactly how i feel thank you so much.
Anyone who tells you that 1 year old don't have tempers has obviously never been a parent.
If you've already had her checked over by her pediatrician, I saw you have nothing more to worry about. It's just a kid doing what she does best: getting what she wants out of life, which is her mommy. What she doesn't understand is that her mommy & daddy need each other, too. So let her scream & cry; once she learns that you won't react to it, the temper tantrums will become far & few between.
DO NOT STRESS !
No by going to the doctors hun I meant ear infection - tooht ache etc nothing bad - by my own personal experience your little one is just playing up ! It was just a precautionary measure.
Look hun honest it seems like no light at the end of the tunnel I know - I have spent hours sat outside bedroom doors - singing daft songs till Ihave fallen asleep next to a cot - basically banged my own head on a wall.
Lack of sleep is the most horrid thing and you end up being short tempered and shouting and it is a nasty circle.
Honest it does get better. You sound like a fantastic mummy and yor little girl loves you to bits - but mummy and daddy need some time too - so try little steps to sort out this problem. What works for one does not work for another - Kids do not come with a manual - you will get past this phase I promise you x
Then go threw it all again if you add to your family!
Don't worry, she won't hurt herself. I remember when I was young, I use to just sit their and cry, throw things and try to rip off my hair in order to get something. But i couldn't do it, the pain will be greater at that age then the wants. Don't worry, she won't hurt herself.
Im getting tears in my eyes with thanks to all your support and advice - it feels good to be able to talk about this to people who know what im going through. Thank you all so much especially mum2five - hopefully light will be at the end of the tunnel eventually
Do you know for a fact that there is no medical reason for this? If you do then ask the doctor for sleeping pills for her, and try them for a couple of nights. Other than that, she is trying to be the boss and apparently is succeeding at it.
Sleeping pills do not seem to work with kids! Unless they are super strong dose!
But in that case, its not good for early brain development. Whatever you do, stay away from as much drug as possible. A child is better living a drug-free life, anything natural is better then man made. Maybe vitamins is okay, allergy is a exception, you can't do anything about a runny nose....
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