I have two children. 13 years old boy and 12 years old girl. Yesterday, my girl wrote me a letter with these big questions of which she mentions that she has been thinking about for quite a while. Here is the questions:

1. What is the use of me?
2. Why am I in this world?
3. What is the meaning of "union"

On top of that, she drew a picture of my son, my husband and me but excluding herself from the picture. She also wraps a gift ( a key chain in love shape) for me and my husband together with the question she asked and put in on my pillow last night.

I am loss as to how should I answer her and this is the first time the child asked me this sort of questions.

Is there anyone who has the same experience and is willing to share with me as to how to handle these question it?

Marriedguy

@ altenweg...I agree with your answer 100% I just didnt want the aydyn think giving her daughter a good answer was going to solve her issues. So I reinforced what you said about seeking counsel. I didnt mean to offend you, and if I did I do apologize.

Allheart

1. What is the use of me?
2. Why am I in this world?
3. What is the meaning of "union"

On top of that, she drew a picture of my son, my husband and me but excluding herself from the picture. She also wraps a gift ( a key chain in love shape) for me and my husband together with the question she asked and put in on my pillow last night.

Mom, bless your little girl. What a special little girl that can have such deep meanings?

I would agree that maybe a homework assignment, but because of the keychain and picture, it would be reason enough for me to give it consistent focused attention.

You could tell your daughter....that ....(hopefully you can fit this in)....Saturday afternoons will be girls day. Not just one Saturday..consistent focused is needed...

So, Saturday afternoons is girls day, and you can tell her this Saturday, over lunch, you and her will talk about question 1.....and next Saturday....question 2.

It may be just a whim she had, homework assignment or she really may be hurting inside.
I think it's well worth focusing and setting just a couple of hours for girls day. And if it is homework, or a whim, you still spent precious time with your daughter that I bet both of you will cherish when you look back years from now.

Let her know you hear what her heart is trying to say. Not in words but loving "Mom" attention.

I could be way off here. I'm not a parent. But I was a little girl, with a heavy heart sometimes.

Let us know ...okay ...and good for you for taken notice on the incredible questions.

Altenweg

You didn't offend me, I'm just sick and a bit grumpy and didn't realize that my post sounded like I might be offended. You are correct counselling is a must. She's at an age were not everything makes sense and hormones are running rampant. If I sounded offended then I apologize.

Mr_am

I agree with all of the above answers .. well done nice words and expression .. what is as important as words are actions. The child needs to feel the nice words you tell her .. by your attention and more care towards her .. you would need to get closer to each other ... doing activities together .. have more time to talk to her and to listen to her. Women tend to talk a bit more .. means we need someone to listen.

You are lucky cos the questions were not that bad ...It was an early alarming siren. Kids need more attention from parents. From my point of view .. you do not need any external help .. use your instinct as a mother (some help from her father would be appreciated too) and you would know how to deal with it .. and do things very well and do not worry .. even if you are facing this alone .. your effort is great. Good luck.

Mr_am

Come on .. let's keep school out of this ... !! It must be her place in the family .. that she does not feel beloved.

Allheart

I don't think it has ANYTHING to do with a homework assignment, It was written as...maybe this or maybe that....or maybe she's hurting inside. An that is what I truly think.

Please read the entire post and no reason for your tone.

Why do people have to be so rude. All the caring words written and you chose that sentence?

Please again, read the whole post. I don't want the sentiments of what I wanted to share with this Mother thrown off by what you chose to make unkind.

justcurious55

i remember going through that phase. it was awful. i felt unloved, underappreciated, and totally out of place in every setting. remind your daughter she is loved and appreciated and even if she doesn't know what her purpose in life is now that everyone has one and it just takes most of us a while longer before we figure it out. i found that getting more involved in things helped. maybe take a fun class (like belly dancing) together or do a walk for breast cancer or another cause together. you guys can bond and she can have something to feel good about. she's probably just going through an awkward stage and needs some extra support and guidance.

ScottGem

You have the right to disagree, but I don't think my suggestion should be so easily dismissed. I'm not saying it Must be a homework problem, but I do believe that its a possibility that should be explored. I firmly believe that before any answers are given, it should be determined why the questions are being asked. Knowing that will help determine how they should be answered.

Allheart

Sorry Mr_am, I read your post first thing in the Am and got upset that my sentiments were misunderstood , and it was before my coffee and I wanted the OP, to understand what I was trying to say from my heart.

I was wrong to get my curls in a spiral....sorry there. But I don't think it was a homework assignement because of what she gave Mom under her pillow, but Scott is right, you have to consider all possibilities, but I still say Mom should have girls day.

Sorry again.