ever since i was young, ive had dreams...dreams of people who to my outside knowledge, never existed. yet i knew their entire life stories, from birth to supposed death.theyd follow me as if they knew me, and it frightened me at first because something in me knew they werent mere figments of my dreams. then after a while of having these dreams, i told myself not to fear them, because they told me they meant no harm, and although i was still cautious i trusted them. now, mind you i was only about age 2-6 when i had these dreams. so i had no reason for knowing these types of things, or these people. another topic id like to be answered is ive had a hard life, even in the small time of 15 years. it all turned bad at the age of 4, i remember distinctly. i remember hearing a voice that was very real in my mind, telling me bad things that no four plus year old should think. it sometimes caused me to do some bad things, and other times made me think bad things about people who i loved. around 5th grade i was fed up. i couldnt stand the voices anymore but i feared telling my parents because i didnt want to be seen as some crazed phycologically ill child who had to be sent away. so i kept quiet. finally in around 8th grade, the voice was telling me things and i remember bickering with it in my mind about how what it was saying was not true. finally in my thoughts i screamed to it that i wanted it to leave and it had to leave or else. i havent heard it since. i mention the voice thing because it has to do with this dilemma i have. it seems no matter what i do everything comes out negative for me. i often feel like satan has me under his eyes and is using me almost like a puppet. ive dealt with alcoholism, abuse, paranormal events and so on. its caused me on a few occasions to have to cry out for god to help...and he never has. the thought of this brings tears to me eyes, because im sick of the torment bestowed upon me and the pain inside me that swells although on the outside, you couldnt see it.often ill be walking and i know im being followed and watched intently by something unfriendly and it scares me to a point to where everywhere i go i have to run, to feel like ive escaped it. ive had things thrown at me in my own home by invisible forces on numerous occasions, ive been home alone and heard heavy objects come crashing down in the other room, only to find that evereything is still in its place. i just want an explanation, because all of this isnt even half of what happens to me on a daily basis. i also can sense and "see" spirits and their presense. i want god to approach me and tell me everythings alright. i want him to cradle me in his arms and help me through my angst and pain because im slowly dying...and on the note of dying i happen to know the exact time ill die...unfortunatley im gettign the message that if God doesnt help me i will be gone sometimes during my being 16 years old. please someone help me, i need help from god and although im not extremely religious, i just want things to be normal and i want to know that He loves me...because all my life ive felt cast out and broken.

Jesushelper76

The cast out and broken. The people who have had the most turmoil. God is there with you. God does love you. He loves you more because through all of life experiences you have gone through. Your making it through. These spiritual experiences will make you a stronger person. Sometimes God has messages for you but you are focused on other things, and open to other things maybe that is why it is hard to hear him but he is there.

I also suggest counseling, Counseling especially Godly counsel is a good stepping stone for protection. You can share your thoughts and feelings. It is not good hiding or pretending that your not going through anything. Keeping this in for so long, you need to get it out in the open and counseling will help you get your thoughts out there.

You can use these experiences as a gift or a curse but it is up to you which one you decide to look at. You are an open minded individual and you have been struggling which everybody does in their life. It is just a matter of rising above everything.

yourmom1

thank you very much. ive been told it makes me stronger by dealing with it, but i feel as if im alone, although i know im truly not. im just not really sure what to make of anything.

Jesushelper76

Your not alone, there are so many people out there with similar experiences in life. You said you have experiencing things since you have been young. I think it is time to look at it as a gift. Changing the way you think about things will change the outlook on life and how you look at each situation and there will be a positive outcome. Might not be right away but over time things will change for the better. That I am sure of.