How do you show your love & compassion?

Looks like the other thread is officially closed b/c I have no more room on my p/c.

I went back over something and noticed(which I hadn't seen before)

I saw Orange's last post for that thread. I think it's on p.15 or 16 in the "confused about religion" thread.

I am praying for her to be ok. I don't think she would joke about something like that.

Now my question is........How do you feel about Love & Compassion?

DrJizzle

ouch....

this is not a good subject for me. I think I have a few issues regarding how I show Love and Compassion. I feel for Orange. I really do. She is great and she will be in my thoughts and prayers.

I have always dealt with death a bit differently. I guess I dont mourn very well... or at all, really. I have had an unusual amount of close friends & family die. Not just me... this small town that I live in. The deaths in my generation started here when i was a freshman. Murders, suicides, car accidents and more have taken best friends, girlfriends, close relatives, highschool buddies, best friends girlfriends, and more... I dont think that I am really numb to it, its just gotten to a point where these occurances, along with my personal beliefs, have led me to an understanding.... or acceptance, rather.

Its always struck me as strange... even my friends here are affected deeper than I am. Ive never cried over a death... but I dont just bottle it up either. My girlfriend tells me I dont have a heart... of course, she knows otherwise but she just means toward death. I dont know...

31pumpkin

We, meaning anyone on this thread, can talk about Love & Compassion if they
care to.

They don't necessarily have to talk about Death and Dying. Just something like
"is it a good quality in a person?"
"Do you feel like the world is lacking in these qualities? Do you that think Love is the Answer? Still?"




And I Love You So.

Fr_Chuck

We all see it differently. I am actually a bad one to discuss or talk about compassion, since I am perhaps alittle "harder" than I need to

I had worked for 5 years in high security prisons with the worst of the worst. After that I worked on the street with drug dealers and hookers and the homeless for another 6 years. So for 11 years I have worked and seen the worst that society can do and the worst people can become.

So it was hard to move on and work with elderly and people who are near death.

I beleive we each see pain and suffering from a level that we are, or have been. So it is often hard to feel for someone when thier bad situation is better than yours or better than most of the people you deal with.

It does not mean we don't care, but just that we don't have a good reference to reach to them.

I know often my own responses here seem alittle hard and I speak too direct but that is a result of where I was for so long

jduke44

I think Love and Compassion is a good quality in everyone regardless of who they are. Do they all possess it? No. I don't think everyone can show love and comapssion..well at least not the way someone may want to receive it.

I don't think the world is lacking. I think there could be more of it. But as a society, we do what we can.

I do think that Love is still the answer. Sometimes tough love but nonetheless.

At times I would say that I was more like Fr Chuck. I try to be more sympathetic to the hurting but I just don't have it in me sometimes. I hardly even cried at my father's funeral when i was 19. It doesn't mean I didn't care that he died. I just didn't show it the way others may.

That surprises me knowing you are a Bishop of a church. (stay with me on this)

Ahhh, this explains it then.

BTW, I don't think your responses are all that hard or direct. Although, I haven't been the one receiving the response.

Society thinks that because you are a religous leader or just plain religous you should show a certain kind of compassion.
Some People need the kind of compassion that Fr Chuck has bc there are some that would take advantage of a Mother Theresa kind of compassion.

Some people need the kind of compassion that Mother Theresa has shown bc they need a little more caring than others.


These are good questions bc who really knows how much or how little love and compassion someone should show or have.

orange

I am okay... I have just not been on much in the last few days. My husband's brother and sister-in-law were killed in a car accident in Vancouver last Saturday. They left behind 2 small children ages 4 and 6. My husband and I flew to Vancouver on Sunday morning and we are still here (we take our computer with us when we travel). After the funeral on Monday, we stayed on with the rest of the family for shiva (mourning) which lasts 7 days. We are the legal guardians of the 2 children, so we are now adopting them. I'll probably be flying home next week sometime.

I had started a thread about this on Saturday night, shortly after it happened:

http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/bereavement/tragic-news-22654.html

Just go there if you want to read more... it's been fairly active. I'm still pretty tired (being pregnant and not getting much sleep lately!) so I don't want to type more or stay online long. Thanks for caring.

Fr_Chuck

Yes most people don't realise that Bishops are actually more administors in todays world than ministers. They have management duties, monetary issues, reviewing backgrounds of clergy and answering untold emails and phone calls.

And normally they don't see the "regular" people on a daily basis, that is what the parish clergy does. Normally you will have to have an apointment to see your local Bishop.

** since I am over an Order and it is not a large rich group it works alittle different for me.

The hardest thing for me was watching people we would help, feed, clothe and do other help for, get clean from drugs, then latter we see them dirty, needle marks going back into the crack house or selling thierself on the street. There were so few victories.

jduke44

It must have been hard when you keep seeing the same people you helped go back to drugs.

The church I used to go wwas a well-to-do church but we tended to attrack alot of the high-maintenance people. Although, your heart goes out to them, generally they would fall into the same trap. When you finally, say enough is enough, you need to get yourself away from the influences, they leave the church. Very few would actually stay. They were the genuine want to get better. What people don't understand (I have a hard time with) is that if you minister to others you help yourself by feeling better bc you helped someone in need. I try to forget about whether the person stays "helped" or not.

Fr_Chuck

yes I guess we are getting alittle off the orginal question, but we worked right on the street, I would serve the street people on the street, but often people knowing where I lived came to ask for ( well they asked for money but we never ever gave money out) but we did give small bags of food, ready to eat stuff.

I would often go into some of the city parks after dark were even the police officers had a rule not to go into by thierself at night.

I visited with people in cardboard and tents under bridges and in old deserted warehouse buildings.

It is hard to forget some of thier faces, esp the ones that ended up dead.

I often lay at night wishing I could forget alot of the things I have seen, the one that haunts me the most is the first girl that died in my arms, she was about 16 or so, and her boyfriend had been drinking, I was there one of the first people on the scene. I am not sure how people like Mother Thersa did it, year after year.

jduke44

I think Mother Theresa had a gift of love and compassion. That's what I was talking about before about some people have an actual gift of it and some people have to work at it to be loving.