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How about if we use this thread to count the NC days, all of us? Each one would mention how long he/she's been maintaining the NC period and how he/she feels with time.
Maybe in some way this can help us all (including me)?
This is my first NC day.. Afternoon here, so far didn't even touch my phone. I don't know how I feel, but I'm not that miserable, I have a goal and thinking about it, NOT HER!
well im back to day 1 no contact. lol im determind this time,prolly more than ever. but hey bigbird, im looking into buying a bike too. im thinking it will actually help keep my mind off my ex. being free, one with the road so to speak. and gas will be saved like never before. im excited about that.
day 6 and i broke NC. not because i wanted to, but because i had to. i went online after about two weeks. last i was on it was two days before my bf told me he didnt see us together and felt he was trying to hard to fall for me. anyways, we were having a conversation online two days before. we both were involved in some celebrations. people from my community came together and were celebrating in another city few days before. he was with his friend talking to some girl. i was close by with my friends. surprisingly i meet one of my exs from 10 yrs back. we met, i gave him a friendly hug and we just stood their talking for a few mins. all of us (we all had traveled from this city to the other) came back. my bf and i were talking online that nite and he kinda told me he saw me turning into one of my friends who flirts with anyone and everyone. i was taken aback. im generally considered the conservative type who is very professional and highly respected by my peers. i was like what r u talking about. he didnt go into details, he was like i just wanted u to know that. i let it slide. i told him how i met my ex after ten years and along with all my other friends. i never hid anything from him, nor did i want to. he was like ok.. i thought he logged off, so i logged off too. i didnt log back on until now and what i saw was an i-m that said, "if u find ur ex attractive, dont let me be the one to stop u." well apparently, i made no comment about that because i never saw it, nor did he say anything. two days later we break. ive been maintaining nc.. but now that i saw this, i lost it. i figured this was the reason.. that he thought i would cheat on him or something. so he just bailed. i sent him an email saying i wasnt sure what happened, but this is what my imagination stirred up. i basically tried to tell him that if after all this time, he saw me as such a cheap, lowly person who had no values and ethics, then he doesnt know me at all and if im right about this, then i dont know what else to say. and left it at that. was my reasoning wrong?
alright day 2 of NC. still waking up is the hardest part.but their are good days and their are the bad. not much i can do about that. i have one problem that im not sure if any1 else has....i have a college class with her every tuesday and thursday. im not talking to her in the class or anything but is their anything else i can do to make it easyer?
classicrocker - be civil with her. Do not show and preach about your hurt feelings,your relationship on so on.Be business,no drama,no over-emotion.Dont play it too cool though,just act as a regular guy.
Day 15! 3 more days and I reach my own personal best. (Last time on the 18th day he called and I foolishly answered and we wound up getting back together for another 7 months...only to break up again for the same stupid reasons). Agh!!!
My dilemma is now that his b-day is in 5 days and I don't know what to do. Last time we spoke other than him telling me how much he loved me and how sorry he was for everything he actually said to me "you'll call me for my b-day, right?"...I don't want to be a b*tch but i want to do what's best for me. I'm thinking maybe I'll just send him a voicemail this way I don't have to actually talk to him that just says "happy birthday, hope all is well, bye"...But i also don't want to be a chump! We'll see how strong I feel later this week. If I'm strong enough, I'll do it..if not, i won't. I don't want to get pulled back into any confusion. I know, NC means NC...its just hard when these things come up in the middle of them. He has attempted contacted twice and i ignored it so I don't know what to do. I think atleast it'll show him that I'm ok and not a crying sad mess anymore.
I'm trying to live everything now by the motto, "just play it cool"...
I had the same dilemma for the birthday...my thing was: they want you out of their lives, then that's exactly what they get. Calling/leaving v-mail/texting for birthdays...open up a hole for communication. Do what you feel is best for you. If you don't feel like contacting them, then don't. There's no wrong to it...yes, they may think you're a jerk for not calling, but...it's what they wanted right?
My dilemma is now that his b-day is in 5 days and I don't know what to do. Last time we spoke other than him telling me how much he loved me and how sorry he was for everything he actually said to me "you'll call me for my b-day, right?"...I don't want to be a b*tch but i want to do what's best for me.
Stay with NO CONTACT. Keep the door closed. Its his birthday, and your attention, is not his present. Why give him false hope?
Sneeze/Tal - I know you're both right. I was thinking a lot about it today and I was like wait, why would i wish him a happy b-day. If he wants me out of his life, than i'm out of his life. Regardless of how "friendly" the breakup was, the fact of the matter is, i still got dumped. So why in the world should i give him one more second of my attention? He gave that up the second he walked away from us. I'm tired of being the nice girl to him. Its over!
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