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How about if we use this thread to count the NC days, all of us? Each one would mention how long he/she's been maintaining the NC period and how he/she feels with time.
Maybe in some way this can help us all (including me)?
This is my first NC day.. Afternoon here, so far didn't even touch my phone. I don't know how I feel, but I'm not that miserable, I have a goal and thinking about it, NOT HER!
Len21 - Don't worry. You'll have good days and bad. Today's a bad day so there should be a good day in the horizon somewhere.
Yes, don't sleep with him again! Ofcourse, if he can sleep with you and not actually be in a relationship, he's going to jump at the chance. But that's not what you want, right? Focus on what you want. Not what he wants. Its all of you or none of you! He can't get the all the great benefits of a relationship without any of the responsibilities. Trust me, I've been there. Not with my current ex, although he was 25, but with guys I was involved with in my early 20s.
(And before you guys get upset, I'm not saying all guys are like that, you guys are great bunch and i only wish i knew guys like you. But i'm just saying some...i mean who's not going to jump at sex with no strings attached?)
BTW, i wish i could change my screen name now cause its been 5 weeks now and I honestly don't feel like i'm "losingit" anymore. Oh well, I'm sure there may be more of those days to come.
You are right and it is funny cause i know all this but somehow i think i can jusitfy it to myself, like thinking it is not such a big deal but if a couple of days later like now it is affecting me then of course i should just stop it... sux when it is so fun at the time lol!! i really am kidding myself though so i just got to keep on trucking along and def not txt him for some more no strings sex!!
this guy who has been asking me out heaps just asked me out for dinner again tonight and i am very tempted to go, at least it will take my mind of things but i am worried that i might start comparing...
So weird though even if my ex said he wanted us to get back together i think that would be the last thing i want right now, think i just miss the comfort!! crazy how the human mind can play tricks..
len21 - you're so on your way to bigger and better things and are starting to really think clearly so just keep on your path.
I've thought the same thing. I miss the comfort and physical interaction my ex and I had and have thought, "well, maybe we could still do that sometimes with him and be fine and still move on..." And I think "agh, don't kid yourself. it'll feel great at the moment but the next day you'll start right back to square one. I still love him...doing that with him would always mean more to me than just sex..." Don't tempt yourself.
Yes, if you want to go out on a date you should. Just get it in your mind, that its just a fund night out. This guy doesn't need to be "the one", he doesn't need to "measure up" to your ex, and understand that just because you may not feel anything for this new guy doesn't mean you won't one day find someone who will make you feel the way you felt about your ex or even better! That's what I keep trying to remind myself. : )
Wish i was having a good day am jealous... god i am sooo tempted to contact him today. after spending the afternoon together and then sleeping together again on Sunday (stupid i know) and him saying he wants to see me again this week. It ended with a txt from me saying that i would give him a txt this week to catch up but managed to hold off till now and really want to not txt again because I know it sounds messed up but i am hoping that he is waiting for my txt!!!
I've learned that every time you make contact, you're tempted to make more contact. like tempted more than you were before, i would say after about 3 weeks of absolute no contact, it becomes a breeze. and then before you know it you're actually moving on... insane, i know. I knew i when i was pretty much over her when certain songs on my iTunes list came on, and i smiled at the memories i have. and didnt curl into a fetal position and cry myself to sleep lol.
Hi guys, WOW!! I just surpassed the nine month mark. nine months broke up, nine months NC.
I read this thread alot. I wonder how some of you can remain friends with your ex's. I still hold alot of resentment towards my ex and could never be his friend and that makes me feel kinda small sometimes. Like somehow i'm not a big enough person to just let it go.
Then what really pi$$es me off about myself is when I read the posts here about the ex's making contact I find myself feeling a little envious because my ex left and never ever looked back.
Kinda makes you feel like you never exsisted....Like you've been erased.
Then what really pi$$es me off about myself is when I read the posts here about the ex's making contact I find myself feeling a little envious because my ex left and never ever looked back.
And where does it get them , they get stuck at certain stages or go back considerably. They should be envious of you really.
Like Tal says "missing" 9 months is not enough most of the time to get over a long term Relationship , and yes you are doing great!!!
Wow, Its okay to have those feelings. 9 months is not a long time to heal, after a 7 year relationship, but your doing great.
Thanks tal, I am doing great I think. My biggest concern is the next time I get into a relationship one of 2 things will happen. 1) I won't see it if he's pretending to be in it 100% like the last one.... or 2) He'll be in it 100% and i'll think he's pretending because of the last one.
How do you leave the bull$h!t baggage of the last relationship behind?
And where does it get them , they get stuck at certain stages or go back considerably. They should be envious of you really.
Like Tal says "missing" 9 months is not enough most of the time to get over a long term Relationship , and yes you are doing great!!!
I know you're right about what your saying. I'm just saying that being completely forgotten hurts alot too. I guess that just goes to show you that break ups suck reguardless of how they play out.
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