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How about if we use this thread to count the NC days, all of us? Each one would mention how long he/she's been maintaining the NC period and how he/she feels with time.
Maybe in some way this can help us all (including me)?
This is my first NC day.. Afternoon here, so far didn't even touch my phone. I don't know how I feel, but I'm not that miserable, I have a goal and thinking about it, NOT HER!
Ha! You're so right. "If you can walk away from us, I can walk away from you!" I'm going to keep reminding myself. Yeah, my ex-bf is like "I love you, I will always love you, I want you to call me whenever you need someone to talk to...someone who knows you..someone who loves you"...ha, how could I do that? Call the person that walked away from me? He should be worrying about who he's going to call now when he needs someone!
Day 10 NC. Sad, but ok. No chance of breaking NC. I set a goal for myself. 5 weeks! We've never gone longer than 2 1/2 weeks without speaking in 4 years so that should really put the hurt on. Well, 3 1/2 weeks to go! Hopefully, by then I won't care so much anymore. I know you shouldn't put a time limit on NC, but in these early days, a goal is the only thing that keeps me sane and not so sad.
Day 4... so horrible just saw something on a freinds facebook about him scoring a girl on the weekend. feel horrible and sick all at the same time, it hurts so bad to imagine him kissing someone else. but i know i cant judge him i have been out on a few dates and kissed another guy. its weird though i dont think i should do much more dating cause i just think about him when I am with someone else. I hope secretley he does the same... man this sux:-(
Len21 - Definitely don't check the facebook/msn/myspace...any of that. Trust me! It will only hurt so much more. Not worrying about that stuff makes it so much easier. Years ago, I broke up with a bf and spent months "checking" up on him (ie. phone records cause the bills were still coming to my house, myspace pages, etc.). All it did was make things 100xs worse..and I was just doing it to myself. Now, I have zero contact with my current ex, zero contact with anything to do with his "world" and it really makes the separation sooooo much easier. I'm not going to spend my time focusing on what he may or may not be doing. Just focus on what I can control and that's myself and my own actions.
The way I look at, anything he does after you've broken up is no reflection on you. So don't worry about it. Like you said, you've kissed other guys, and its still no reflection on how you feel about him.
I'm also going to try to hold off on dating for a while because the thought of it just makes me think more about him and only makes it harder.
I am on day 2 of no contact and this sucks so bad. I'm so hurt over everything that happened. I just don't get it. I fought for my gal over and over throughout our relationship (about a year and a half), and never gave up on her. I just feel so betrayed.. I was so committed to her, and yet she could just walk away and not look back. It frickin' kills. I love her so much, and the last time I talked to her she said she still loves me too, but that we won't ever be together again. Everyday since we broke up (about a week and a half now) I get off work and just come home and cry. I'm so heartbroken. And I'm so tired of being sad, but I just can't help it. We were each other's support, and that is lost now. God I want to be better, but I don't see it happening any time soon.
Day 42 of NC 2nd time around ( with a minor run in on monday the only bl, but im not counting that as it was an accident, and lasted about 15 seconds! )
if i look back on how i feel at christmas time when this crap all started compared to now, im miles better. I know that this is not going to be a quickly resolved pain, but from reding the other posts on this topic i know it will fade in time.
I get annoyed when i think of her now, as it really sucks to get dumped, but its her loss, as she will never find another me, so she can get on with it.
just try and keep as busy as you can, when you busy doing an activity especially a physical one, it puts the thoughts of the ex out of the mind, for a while at least, and thats the goal.
focus on what you can control, and let them go and get on with their decision.
Well done Canefan for getting to day 51, and belight, i couldn't eat or barely sleep on day two of NC, so if you can eat, your doing better than i was,
and now i'm on that road to recovery, just hope i don't have any more run ins with the ex, but its a small town, and i'll be strong again if it happens again.
Theres been an update in my no contact...last time we spoke was 2 weeks ago when the last thing she said on msn was "are you ignoring me on purpose?" on which I didnt reply..and then a couple of days later I found she blocked me..
about 15 mins ago she tried to send me a song on msn..I didnt say anything I just accepted..and like 3 seconds into it im like " am I doing?" and I went offline,,and back online..hoping that she thinks maybe I got disconnected or something and didnt accept...
but I guess it shouldnt matter what she thinks as long as I didnt speak to her right???
I showed her I was there I kind of feel I showed weakness in some sense??
reassurance . :/
tough one, but essentially you are. your ignoring her for your own good.
as far as receiving the song, i would have been inclined to reject it, as you did in the end.
your still in the early days of NC really, so your bound to be a bit confused if shes sending you things when your both online.
~I wouldn't say it was weakness and you aren't there for her anymore.
your doing well, but if possible id avoid putting yourself in situations where you can interact for now, such as msn.
my ex wanted me to be afriend on facebook but i ignored her request. she has no right to see what im up too, and i sure as hell don't want any contact with her, tho there will always be a part of me that does, if that makes sense.
keep going with the NC, but try and stay away from situations that you can control such as chatting on MSN.
I just figured I dont want to block her from msn and facebook..I always considered it kind of lame in that sense..and the truth of the matter is my facebook is blooming as opposed to hers thats dead, so I want her to see that im getting on..though I dont really care if she doesnt see...
it just annoys me how she dumps me but now she wants my attention.
I wish she would leave me alone
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