I just had this idea after reading Mik's post.

How about if we use this thread to count the NC days, all of us? Each one would mention how long he/she's been maintaining the NC period and how he/she feels with time.
Maybe in some way this can help us all (including me)?

This is my first NC day.. Afternoon here, so far didn't even touch my phone. I don't know how I feel, but I'm not that miserable, I have a goal and thinking about it, NOT HER!

What about the rest of you?

losingit77

For those struggling in the early days, take it from us who have been there and still there. IT GETS EASIER! MAINTAIN NC! EVERYTIME YOU BREAK IT YOU START THE CYCLE ALL OVER!

My first stretch of NC lasted 13 days. Then I broke it and opened up the flood gates again. And had to start all over feeling crappy again. Now I'm on Day 19 of my new NC cycle and the past 3 days have felt AWESOME! The first 2 weeks are going to be rough but after a while you start to see the light at the end of the tunnel. They'll be good days and bad but the longer you go the good days will start to outnumber the bad days and you'll start to feel like your old self again.

The first 2 weeks I couldn't concentrate on anything. I couldn't get any work done, I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep. All I wanted to do was lie in bed all day and stare. I was pretty much just a zombie struggling to get through every moment of every day without completely losing it. But then, one day you wake up and think, what am i doing? I just wasted the past 2 weeks, 4 weeks, 4 months, whatever, wallowing in sadness. I'm tired of being sad. Ok, my ex no longer wants to be with me. BOOHOO! Big f'in deal! Their loss! My life will go on..as a long as I pick myself off, dust myself off, and get back to LIVING!

Don't beat yourself up cause of what you're feeling/experiencing right now. You'll get through this. We're all in this together!

What a great week I'm having. Only 7 weeks out of a 4 year relationship and I think I'm ahead of schedule. Hopefully this high will continue for a while...

nickshehe

I dont think I'm making any progress...
Day 35 I think. Havent seen her in two months..I deleted her from facebook about a week ago but I still find myself trying to find some sort of information..I don't obsess over her. She just steals my thoughts about 4-5 times a day where I just turn off momentarily and sigh at how stupid this is.
No intention of breaking NC I just feel a bit down lately. I've got a lot to look forward too in the summer, lot's of girls seem to be interested in me but I just feel bummed out lately. Maybe its my exams coming up I dno?

blah

AshleyStar

Day 3 of NC and going on a date tonight. My heart is still aching but I need to go through this stage of dating to move on.

My ex said on Tues that he'd let me know by Friday if he has managed to get the money he owes me. So today is the day. Still holding out for a "I've made a terrible mistake" text

nickshehe

Ashley, what you should do is set a personal time line. Mine was 2 weeks after we broke up. I decided - if she comes back before those 2 weeks I will accept her. If she is ONE day late -I promised myself that I wouldn't take her back. Whatever the case she didn't come back -lol :P
She made contact but I guess I wasn't all that important after all..

P.S : just read how self loathing that was : >
I'm OKAY! *thumbs up*

AshleyStar

It's interesting to see that guys can go through the same pain. Any men I have known always seem to move on easily.

I did the worst possible thing and opened my emails from him. One was from ten days ago saying "i love you so much" ick ick ick. the pain!!!!!! they're deleted now

bigbird213

If you met me (and probably some of the other guys here) we wouldn't be so forthcoming in real life Its easier when no one knows who you are

ihatewestseneca

You only think they move on so easily because you only see what they show you... chances are, they've all missed you, and were also hurt.

chuff

It's funny because I always seemed to think women moved on easier.

bigbird213

I lost count of how many days -- somewhere around 3 weeks. I don't feel like counting it out.

Still miss her at times, still wish she would call me at times, but I spend much more time excited about going out and meeting new people. I'm waiting until I find someone attractive again and get to start talking to them. I'm excited for the next week or two as the rest of my friends will be home from college and the summer festivities can begin

Many of my friends are happy with the close circle we have, but that limits my opportunities to meet new people. I'm making it my personal mission to expand our circle of friends or at least find new places to go and hang out.

On a note about NC: I've noticed that apart from making me feel better about the breakup, NC has helped me with other aspects of my life. I think it proved to me how much will power I actually have. Any other efforts I have that require self control I find myself talking myself through and being much more consious of my actions. For example: Keeping on my working out, watching what I eat, and trying to come out of my shell and talk to people more. All of these things are easier now that I have learned how much my mind has control over itself.

NC is the way to go

losingit77

I don't know if women or men handle breakups better. I think we just tend to deal with it differently. From my experience, women tend to deal with emotions early on in the grieving stage and get over it quickly by letting it all out in the beginning and talking with friends/family about it. Its more socially accepted for women to be crying messes to their friends.

I think guys tend to try to act tough in the beginning like it doesn't faze them and bottle up the emotions because they don't feel like they can talk about it to friends/family. Then, after weeks/months, it sets in and that's when the emotions come bursting out. So, while it may seem like women get over it easier, i don't think that's necessarily the case. They may just deal with it sooner and get over it so by the time the guy gets a hold of their emotions and the loss the girl has seemingly already moved on. I mean from my own personal experience, I can't tell you how many of my guy friends suddenly start weeping and missing their ex's months after the split when all along they were acting to the outside world like they didn't care.

Not in all cases, just a hypothesis. : )