This might sound silly but I really don't know what to do, me and my boyfriend have been dating for over a year now. We get on great, everything is going good we have been through a lot together and he is always there for me and treats me like a princess. The only thing is he doesn't love me he has never told me he loves me. He shows me he loves me because he totally respects me and always puts me first. The other night I asked him if he loved me and he was trying to avoid the answer but eventually after a lot of persuding he told me he doesn't love me but why is this? He said he felt pressured but after all this time he should be able to tell me how he feels I love him and told him this but didn't seem to make a diffrence. He has spoke about the future with me and everyone tells me he loves me including his mother and friends but he obviously doesn't so what do I do ? He is very difficult to understand and I think a big part of this is because he was in the army for so long any answers to this would help me I need advice what do I do thanks

One thing you need to learn in life is never try to pressure a man to say I love you. He'll say it when he is ready to and pressuring him may end up pushing him away. He apparently cares very deeply for you and for now that should be enough. If he says I love you just because you want him to it won't be worth the breath he wasted to say it.

Thank you that sounds so right I'm scared that I might push him away he has told me I'm his weakness so I know I must mean a lot to him I just wish he was feeling the way I do about him, its really hard I don't think he would be with me all this time if he didn't think we were meant to be do you?

Love is what he does for you, not pretty speeches.

Yes I agree with that but its nice to be reasured and because he says he doesn't well now I don't know what to think :confused:

I haven't ever been told in forty years of marriage.

I think you have a treasure on your hands.

Told u so

:) so you don't mind not bieng told? I think that he is the one for me but I just feel like if he felt the same way he would be able to tell me we get on great though and I don't want to ruin it how do you know if someone loves you? I guess you don't eh?

We're still married, aren't we? Some guys just aren't comfortable saying those words but are happy to show how they feel by how they take care of you. Just hush up and enjoy him being in your life.

Thank you :p

My husband told me probably everyday of our marriage that he loved me, but for him it was about the way he was raised. If you are on the phone with a family member you say I love you before you hang up. If you are leaving after a visit you say I love you before you go. I quickly realized it was just routine for him to say it. It was those times when it was just him and I together, not on the phone or one of us going somewhere that I wanted to hear it because it seemed to mean more then. I on the other hand was raised by a family who only said it when we really felt the need to say it. Bottom line is it really doesn't matter if he says it or not as long as he is showing it. For some of us and probably more so for a man who doesn't want to come across as weak or mushy, saying I love you is hard words to say unless you are 100% sure and ready to make yourself vulnerable to the person you are saying it to.