Hi, I have been married now for 11 months to wonderful husband (at times) I like to have fun, joke around etc.. However a couple of weeks before Thanksgiving, my sister in law said they would being going out for dinner instead of cooking, (she and her husband lives with my mother-in-law). I understood that they was having money problems. So my husband and I offered to buy everything. Which this was not going to work for them either. So a day or so after we was visiting and she the wicked sister-in-law started to tell me how to cook a ham. I had already told her I was not interested, due to the fact I cook mine the way I want . She continued anyway, she was going through with how she prepares it etc.. she gets to the part about putting to coke cans under the ham, and I made a joke as to wouldn't it taste like tin. haha She called me a stupid . My husband and everyone thought she was joking, as we always have joked around before.
But a couple of weeks later she tells my bother-in-law how she called me a and nothing was said to her back. I was really upset to think that she was serious. So I ask my husband what he thought, he said to look over it, but I couldn't , so I called her and ask why she was telling everyone this, she said it was none of my bussiness and hung up the phone on me. We had Christmas dinner for 42 family members and she never would speak or look at me. I feel my husband should have said something to her. But he tells me this is between me and her. I need advise on what to do, say, or even should I not worry that my husband is not standing up for me.

Fr_Chuck

This happens in families and yes he can tell them not to come any longer, and that could be your choice, just don't invite them, but with that you don't have like her and not speaking is a good way,

So tell her what you think if you want and be done with it, if you keep going and worrying about this it will just keep going and going,
And do you really want to ruin a family relationshiop over a ham and a can of coke

s2tp

hmmm, I dont have any experience with a situation like this, but I would think your husband SHOULD take up for you. At least tell his sister to respect you...

Your story was a little confusing...you say she told your brother in law about her calling you stupid, and nobody said anything back to her....so she was making more fun of you for not sticking up for yourself? I think thats what you were trying to say..?

Well how old is she? not that it matters, I have learned recently that age does not always predict maturity... Well she sounds like a real...you said it well, wicked witch...lol.

I dont think you should have to put up with her talking crap and making you feel uncomfortable. she obviously has a problem with you, and by hanging up on you she doesnt seem to want to face it. maybe you can invite her over for dinner and try to discuss it. Or ask your husband to talk with her and see what her problem is... I really dont know, but Best of Luck!

ordinaryguy

Let it go. She's not worth your time. Don't expect your husband to fight your battles for you. If you really need to call her out, do it yourself, but better to leave it alone and let her stew in her own juice.

Fr_Chuck

I guess where I was going is that is is family, did you not fight and argue with your brothers and sisters, In close family people say what they think often. ( now you may come from a family where everything is proper and polite) but normally in family it is not what really happens.

So she calls you something, you call her something back and go on and forget it. That is what is suppose to happen.

Now you don't get your husband involved, she did not call him something, and she don't get her husband involved when you get yours.

This is not grade school and we are adults and are suppose to act like such, even when others dont'

kellyjeff

boy i would like to say its good to hear that other people have these same problems but it really isnt. ihave no idea of what happened to respecting each other and keeping your mouth shut if its going to hurt someone