I'm recently found out that I am pregnant. My boyfriend is black and I am white. My parents haven't met him even though we have been together 6 months already. They completely disapprove of us being together. My question now is how do I mend any relationship with my parents; knowing they do not except us being together and now to bring a biracial baby into the mix is completely unexceptable to them. My bf and I plan on keeping the baby and eventually getting married. But I still would like to have a relationship with my parents and begin a family with my bf.

danielnoahsmommy

samething happened with my sisterinlaw. my inlaws love this little girl with all their hearts now. she is not with the man anymore but the little girl is doing very well

shygrneyzs

You are thirty years old and make your decisions without your parents. You cannot change how they feel, you cannot change their reaction to your bf or the child you are carrying. That is all true, right?

You can welcome them to your home, introduce them to your boyfriend, be cordial and the rest is really up to them. It is sad that they say they cannot accept your life now. They should be trusting you that you made the best decisions possible and trust your judgement.

Often parents change their attitudes after the baby is born. Once they see their grandchild and see how much you and your boyfriend love each other and that baby. I truly hope it works that way with you.

But honestly, the best thing for you to do now is to keep open communications with your parents, let them know you love them, but also stand up for your beliefs. If they come and start in with the negatives, be prepared to ask them to stay somewhere else. Pray that they will open their minds and hearts. You have some obstacles now. But they are able to be overcome.

Good luck to you and your boyfriend and your baby.

Fr_Chuck

You let time go on and hope. It may be that you never will. My wife is black, and we have a child. We have been to my parents house 2 times in 10 years. and one of those was for my fathers funeral. ( and we waited 7 years for the first visit) and to be honest there will not be any more.

In our case, they never accepted, and never will, but I am a adult,and this is thier problem, not my problem. so we go on

reciecup01

Is this your first child?

This type of situation is happening all the time. Are there reasons why they possibly should not like and accept him?

You are a grown woman and should be able to make your own decisions with or without their approval? What does his family think?

This is a big decision that you have to sit down and analyze and make a decision yu will not have any regrets for. in the end it is all about the child and not anyone else.

rebecca2602

This isn't my first child. I was married for 10 years to a white man and we had 2 beautiful boys. My parents are throwing that into this mix too. They say that I am opening them up to many things that don't have to be. ie; getting teased because their mother is with a black man. My mother has told me that she will never see this baby that I'm pregnant with and will never meet my bf. I don't understand how a grandmother could turn her back on her grandchild because of its skin color.

My parents aren't racist they just don't agree with mixing races. They think it is "wrong". My bf's name is Steven and he is 10 years older than me. He is a supervisor at a parts plant in our area. Before that he was an area manager at GM. He is established, has his own home, and 3 other children before we met. He is a well spoken professional ex-Atlanta GA police officer. If my parents would even be open enough to hear anything about him they would realize he is a good family man.

I was never raised to be racist. So my parents behavior is so off the wall for me! I don't expect them to ever meet my bf but I didn't think they would ever turn me away because of my choices. I tell them I am a grown woman who can make her own decisions. They truely aren't having it. My mother has gone as far to say to me that I know what I have to do to make my life right. I know she means an abortion. I don't believe in that and will never do that (I'm 9 weeks preg.)

She has told me that the only way she can deal with this is to close the door on me and "this man" she calls him. And that nothing to do with "this man" will ever be allowed or accepted in their home.

I'm truely lost! I never expected my family to turn on me. ahhhh..... I am now faced with aborting my baby or losing my family. And I hate that my parents have put me in that position to make that decision.

Squiffy

You just need to accept that your parents dont like it, but dont blame yourself for that. I think the older generation, or at least some of them, hold different views to the younger generation (us lol!) And some of them vcant break out of it. Keep your door open to your parents, let them know when the baby is born, dont stop them seeing your other kids, try to be as normal as possible around them, and see what happens when baby is here. I bet once they see baby their hearts will melt and all will be forgotten. If they dont, it is their loss not yours. It seems they are trying to emotionally blackmail you into their way of thinking, and thats not fair on you. Good luck, and I hope things work out.

Tootruetooblue

I suggest that you simply talk respectfully to your parents and say, "I know you are concerned about what people will think of me for being with a black man and having a biracial baby, and I know that some people disapprove. My friends are excited for me, and the people I work with are, too. I have to ask you to trust my judgement, and love my child and let me work the rest out."

Getting married before the baby is born would take one objection off the table, if you plan to marry in a few years - why not now?

Fr_Chuck

lose your family, you would kill a baby because your parents are racist ?

You have your own family, next what your parents will or won't do 2 years from now is hard to say.

So just don't visit them, leave your life with your real family.

Dennis777

Hello Rebecca

Relax... you know in time your parents will Love your baby. A babies smile bypasses all lines of color. Until they admit it enjoy knowing it is killing them not to tell you how excited they are for you.