Identitfy these words of a friend of mine

flower81 · #1 Nov 28, 2006, 10:57 PM

What can someone tell me about these words below of a friend of mine :-
How does she things? She confuses me

"i just take things a day at a time and most of all i don't build fake castles around me. He does treat me well, but I don't put him on a pedestal and make him out to be a saint. He's just a man, never expent anything from them because you'll be in for a big let down.

for now I'm comfortable and i enjoy his company but i'm not really ready to give up my career and freedom to be with him. I like to take things slowly and enjoy life rather than deal with the stressful burdens of a relationship."

flower81 · Nov 29, 2006, 12:42 AM

Forgot to mention.
She is 28, she lost her virginity at the age of 13, she to be honest she was renound to be a slut. She had a bad reputation, well she caused it on herself, she slept with any man that came along, plus 3 women. She was silly enough to once do a list of the amount of men she slept with and im not kidding that list was over 50... I knew her, knew what she was like and knew many guys who said bad things about her after they had sex with her!

Krs · Nov 29, 2006, 01:40 AM

I feel sorry for her

NeedKarma · Nov 29, 2006, 03:27 AM

It appears that she has issues with relationships with the opposite sex. It would be interesting to delve into the root cause of these issues else she'll never have a trusting, loving relationship.

Tuscany · Nov 29, 2006, 03:30 AM

It sounds to me like she has self esteem issues. She does not love herself enough to give love to someone else. Perhaps talking to a professional would help

ordinaryguy · Nov 29, 2006, 03:58 AM

Sounds to me like she may have learned some lessons and isn't so quick to jump into bed with every guy she meets. If so, good for her. And this is your business because....?

valinors_sorrow · Nov 29, 2006, 05:27 AM

Her statement sounds reasonable to me with two minor exceptions. Her "don't expect" statement speaks of unresolved hurt that feeds a trust issue, albeit a little one. Hopefully she will meet a man who impresses her with his integrity enough to rewrite that sentiment. And nobody needs to give up careers or even that much freedom to have a relationship so there again is some belief that looks a little skewed. She could probably use a good female role model who demonstrates that you can have a relationship without giving up so much of yourself. But I wouldn't say either of those are serious and given what you claim about her later on, she is doing remarkably well considering where she's come from...

Are you friend or foe here? Its kinda hard to tell.

flower81 · Nov 29, 2006, 05:53 AM

no no its not me....

I used to be a nerd compared to her! i just worry about her sometimes.
she is now dating this 42 yr old bloke.
I hope she finds happiness 1 day, i keep telling relationships are not burdens and u still have freedom and u can have a career but she has none of it!

She was in a 1 yr relationship where he was a bas*ard, she used to stay at home and cook and clean for her, not sure if he actually cheated on her.

She has changed in the respect where she has more respect for herself, she once told me that before in her teenage yrs she used to sleep with me and think they love her for it now she realises she was only being used.



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