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Home > Family & People > Other Family & People   »   Helping an addict is the hardest thing I have ever tried to do

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Old Mar 24, 2008, 08:03 AM
Hope Grows
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Helping an addict is the hardest thing I have ever tried to do

Hello, my best friend has been a crack addict for a year now and I dont know how much more I can do to help him! As soon as he gets money in his hand he is on the streets looking for drugs and when he doesn't have money he is giving away him personal items to see to it that he gets his fix! My friend leaves him home every hour just about, comes home and locks himself in the bathroom for at least 20 minutes, This is a daily routine! It is not a routine he enjoys and he knows it is wrong, he just can not help it, the addiction has took full control over him! I am always going by his house to keep him company thinking that is might reduce his cravings but it is not! I do little specialy things for him to encourage him and put a smile on his face and it does but it never sinks in! He is leaving tomorrow to go to a 10 day detox where they give the amino acid shot and it is supposed to stop the cravings! I need some advice on what I should do while he is gone and what I should do when he gets back? I dont want to aggervate him because he tends to run from people like that! He always talks to me because I dont talk to him in a belittling manor, we have been best friends for 9 years now and all I want to do is help! I am really worried for him! Please HELP ME if you can, because I just feel like I am not doing enough or not doing the right thing!

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Old Mar 24, 2008, 08:07 AM   #2  
450donn
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As I see it the only solution is to get him professional help. Unfornutately, that will not do any good until he decides for himself that he has a problem and wants to get help. Probably the best thing you can do at this point is tell him in no uncertain terms that you will no longer be his friend or be around him until he decides he has a problem and them get out and stay out
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Old Mar 24, 2008, 08:34 AM   #3  
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I do not have experience with crack addicts. But with the experiences that I do have, is do not give this person an option if you truly love them. I am not telling you to allow them to use you and for you to provide them with drugs, but be there for this person the best that you can and treat them with the respect, love and dignity that everyone deserves. ( not just the clean)

I am sure there are more than enough people in this world that are telling him he is a loser and he has to do such and such inorder for him to fit into their world, please don't add to his feelings of unworth and isolation. Keep on loving him and being his friend.

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simoneaugie agrees: Absolutely.
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Old Mar 24, 2008, 03:21 PM   #4  
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All you can do is be supportive and encouraging to him. He has to come to the point that he can not stand it any longer and wants to quit.
Don't get your hopes up too much because often people go to detox and come out feeling better so much to the point they convince their self that they CAN 'handle' it without getting addicted again....so they start back at it and it is a messed up vicious circle.
Hopefully your friend DOES hate it enough to stay away from it for good once he is out.
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Old Apr 21, 2008, 09:19 PM   #5  
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Nothing you can say or do will change his path at this point. All you can do is take a tough but loving approach of, "I love you but I cannot have a healthy friendship with an active crack addict so I want to tell you that I'm here for you as your friend as long as you are actively participatign in and pursuing your recovery. If you are using, I am not available to you until you are clean and sober. I am part of your sober life and always will be, but I can no longer participate in your addiction." Then stick to your guns.

I've been there with someone I loved a great deal. He had to figure it out. It was hard, but I eventually realized I did not have the tools to change him as long as he was using, because he did not have the capacity to participate in logical thinking until he was clean fora while. That's why treatment is so important - so the person is forced to stop using long enough to be able to start thinking straight on their own.
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