My Mother has always hated me.
My mother called upon me a year ago this last Christmas. She was recovering in the hospital from a broken hip. I was never informed by the "family" that she had hurt herself. No one on her medical team was informed she had a daughter.
So, I raced to her side driving through miles of blizzard conditions. I stayed with an old high school friend who returned with more news every evening. The "family" doesn't trust you, someone in the family has their hands in her money, no one knows she has a daughter, you need to bond with your aunt and cousins, and finally, you need to leave here in two days time. Then the really big one= "if I were you, I would get in your car and travel home as fast as you can!"
This person had become so uncomfortable with all the family gossip concerning me, they no longer wanted me staying with them. I was very short on funds, and to get rid of me, they offered to put me up in a motel.
As usual, within a couple of days, things deteriorated so badly between me and my mother, I prepared for the return trip, thousands of miles, home. I found out, she only wanted me to show-up to show social services there was someone to care for her.
My aunt took her in so she had no further use for me. Through the many years, my mother had spread so many lies about me, no one wanted me around! I have done nothing but try to be close with her. At the time she called me about her injury, we had gone through a long silent time. Times of not communicating because communicating hurt so much, I couldn't do it.
Well, now I'm being accused of stealing various objects of "value" from her home. I'm thousands of miles away and can't defend myself, nor afford another trip back to set the record straight. This is just one instance. I took two more trips back. One trip I was so upset, my husband came to deliver me! I found out so much, so many horrible things she has said about me. Lies, slander and defamation of character.
In my town I'm very well-respected and trusted and loved. I wasn't even included in my Father's obituary! I truly don't know what to do. Another cousin told her, during my May trip last year, that I had a suitcase in her house and probably used it to take things from the house. Well, of course I had a suitcase! I had one for clothes!
The last trip I took was to ask her to move back here with me. She said maybe in a few months. Our phone conversations have been up and down since. Sometimes she speaks to me other times she yells and screams and hangs up on me. I could write pages of the hurtful things she said to me in the past 18 months, it would take hours! How on my second trip, she grabbed my house keys, told me to leave, and I heard her tell the nurse="MY daughter has been here two weeks and hasn't done anything for me." Well, I had been there two days! After again driving almost non-stop thousands of miles to get there! I was so stunned and hurt. I left for home shortly afterwards.
I know she's telling everyone I've abandoned her! It's not abandonment, it's self-preservation. My aunt is a big part of the equation. I know she is.
This has taken a terrible toll on my health, I've been ill all this year. Just sick, remembering as a small child hearing her degrade me to my aunts in the kitchen, saying horrible things when I was only five or so.
I don't know what to do. I would like to have TIME with her, time to bond in this twilight time of her life. "Heart-Broken"