Well here's my story...My wife of 3 years just left me for someone else in February. That's a whole different topic in itself, so I won't get into it. It was more of a relief than anything else honestly, because she treated me like s*** during our entire marriage. I had trouble paying the rent after that, so I had 2 of my close friends move in, who proceeded to make my apartment a disgusting mess and take advantage of me every single chance they got. I met someone else recently who is the sweetest, most incredible person I've ever met in my life, and I truly enjoy every second that I'm with her. Unfortunately, my landlord came downstairs a few weeks ago and told me I had to get out because my roommates are making too much of a mess down here. I found a new, better place to go anyway, so whatever. It's cheaper, too! Now, the reason I brought up all of that was to give you someone background. My question is this...Is it normal at this point for me to NEVER be happy, no matter what? I find myself giving attitudes to people that don't deserve it, and that bothers me a LOT. The girl that I'm with now has stood by me through divorce proceedings, losing the apartment, EVERYTHING. My main concern is that I am giving HER an attitude for no good reason, and I want to stop before it's too late. The problem is, I don't know how to stop something like that. We'll be on the phone, and she'll tell me she has to go get ready for work, and I give her an attitude over that. She doesn't deserve that, period. Could it be that since I was just stabbed in the back, I'm expecting everyone else around me to do the same thing? I just don't know where to turn, and I don't want my actions to go so far as to create consequences that are irreversable. Please, someone give me some input as to what I should do to help myself!

babigirl1

well first from what I read, you have been hurt by your ex and then turn around and got hurt by your friends. My opinion you are carrying a lot of hurt. dont be so hard on yourself. I hear that you dont want to be mean to this other girl. what I would suggest. you need to let go of the past and tell yourself this woman isnt your ex. when you let the pain out. you will free yourself from all that anger. In order to move on one needs to let the past go. it is very hard to trust when you have been hurt by people, but on the other hand if you never trust again you are not living. remind yourself that there are all kinds of people that make the world go around. that means bad and good. we all run into them.

XxSideshowPunkxX

The one thing I guess I should have mentioned is that I work at the same company as my ex-wife. I LOVE my job there, and I'm not willing to let her drive me out. However, I HAVE to see her at SOME point every single day, even by accident. Everytime I see her walk by, the only thing that goes through my head is suspicion that she's up to something. Then I start to get angry, and then the attitude towards everyone else comes out. When we're at work, I don't pay any attention to her whatsoever, however she does nothing but talk about me to people all day long, and I always find out through the grapevine. Then, in an effort to be the bigger person, I don't even bring it up, and I try to let it roll off my back, but sometimes it gets to the point where I want to crack her f***ing head open. To make matters even worse, everyone at my company thinks that I hit her, and that's why she left. I have never in my life laid a hand on a woman, and I never would, either. That's not how I was brought up, and that's the worst insult you could possibly throw at me. I just don't know where to turn anymore, I'm stressed to the point where, on the weekends, all I do is take sleeping pills and sleep from Friday night straight through until Monday morning, just so I don't have to deal with anything. I know it's not healthy, and I know I can't live like that, but it just doesn't seem worth it anymore. I guess you're right, I just need to trust this girl that I'm with now. She's a total sweetheart, and hey, if I don't give it a try, then I'll never know, right?

babigirl1

yes you are right .....you will never know. one thing I would like to say to you and it was very hard on me to get to this point.in my life .........you have to get to a point where what others say about you doesnt matter. I know that seems unreal to be able to do. but you know the truth and God knows the truth. just get up everyday and go to work telling yourself. that 90 % of people in this world live to talk and judge others. dont be a part of their games. or should I say your ex's games. dont let her win.and by you going home and sleeping your life away is letting her win. take your life back. she has all the power and yo have none. you are worthy of love and a life. by you not leaving your job because she is there is part of her not winning. now you just have to hold your head high and if you hear someone talking about it. just walk away. they arent worth the energy. Life is so full of evil and we have two live with it everyday. but we have control of our lives and how we handle them. TAKE YOUR POWER BACK. dont let her win.