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I'm sick of having nothing, I'm sick of being a nobody, i'm sick of everyone hating me for no reason, I'm sick of giving myself to others and them screwing me over,im sick of abuse,I'm sick of being ugly and looking in the mirror and crying cause i hate myself. I'm sick of popping sleeping pills to sleep all day cause i cant bare reality anymore and its the closest thing to being dead. I'm sick of noone understanding, I'm sick of being broke and being stuck in this town,I'm sick of loving someone that does nothing but hurts me over and over,I'm sick of being belittled,I'm sick of worrying about a non existant future,i'm sick of being alone,I'm sick of not having a gun and some bullets to blow my f***ing brains out and ending this all.
How come the doctors,how come the therapist ..the shrinks..the meds can't help me? I'm too far gone. I don't know what to do.
Noo i dont choose for my whole town to hate me for no reason
You haven't chosen for the whole town to hate you, but you've admitted that you have chosen the hair and makeup and behavior and attitudes that turn people off because you want to be yourself and be an individual. Well, maybe it's time to make better choices. Wipe off the makeup and look healthy and natural like you used to, go back to your real hair color, tone down the behavior and attitudes so that you treat people with kindness instead of with sarcasm.
Hi Sweety,
Keep hanging on. Don't lose hope. Your story touches me.You are a beautiful person, inside and out. You have a lot of friends here. It is good that you are writing out your feelings here.
See if your doctor can recommend a woman's shelter that offers assistance with drug dependancy, if you are about to be homeless. There are places you can go and get help from very caring professionals and perhaps get some medications. A therapist can assist with this.
Renew your mind by changing your thought pattern. Fear, anger, criticism and all such thoughts are the most expensive guest we can entertain. They bring a harvest of proverty, misery and discord. There is no need to fear anything for we carry the
indwelling power to overcome everything, It's our mind. When we repeat affirmations, we
are impressing our subcomscious mind with a new thought pattern as a basis for a
new character you can build for yourself. Say this affirmation when a bad thought comes into your mind, also learn it and say it as offen as you can. Memorize it.
"I AM HEALTHY, STRONG, YOUNG, POWERFUL, LOVING, HARMONIOUS, SUCCESSFUL,
and HAPPY"
When you repeat this affirmation, you are impressing your subconscious mind with thoes
qualitiess as a basis for a new character you can build for yourself . We are creatures of habit in both mind and body, so when we start in to change habits of thought we must be ever on gu ard for when we seek to change ourself in any way it seems as though everything goes against us so we can experience some difficulty. So don't give up.
Keep repeating the affirmation, and believe them for yourself, and don't go back to your old way of thinking. This good thinking patern can be part of you that can bring you health and happness.
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