| I have just discovered the man I live with is a sociopath
Hi, I am 37 years old and new to this site. I have been living with a man for seven years and I have just realised, that he is a sociopath. I would really like to leave him, he took me to australia to live, we are both from england. I come from a very loving family, but his behavour, I would describe as scarring my soul. He has no emotions, I can give you hundreds of horrid examples but I am worried nobody would believe me. To name a minute amount, once I was in the shower, I was about to slip and he let me slip, when I turned around and saw him looking at me, I asked him why he did not catch me, he replied because I wanted to see how you fell. Once we were in hawai, and there were huge surfer waves with big red flags saying, Danger, DO NOT SWIM between the flags. the waves were huge. He sat on the beach with me and said that he would like to go for a swim, I said no, I did not want to, he became very quiet and said, please, its because I love you I want to go in the water, I will hold your hand, its nothing dangerous. He managed to insult me a bit and I ended up walking into the water with him, petrified, he somehow moved away from me and a huge wave came on top of me, and I was petrified, I managed to surface and he was swimming away from me and I said, , can you help me, I dont have the strength to swim, help, he started to swim away further from me saying, , stop acting mental, just swim, but the waves were crashing on top of me, and he kept on calling me an animal and an ( excuse my language), eventually a lifeguard came in and pulled me out and the lifeguard really told me off and said Maam can you not see the signs you are NOT supposed to be swimming here. When I was pulled out he accused me of pulling a stunt to get saved by a lifeguard. To this day, he tells me I was mental. The other time was on a ski trip, I had never snowboarded before and had one lesson (i cannot even ski) in the morning. In the afternoon, I was still very unsteady on the snowboard, its very difficult, I met him and he took me on the ski lift to the very top slope, the slope reserved for professionals. just before embarking on the ski lift an instructor yelled out, Hey, you are not supposed to go there yet, come down, but my partner, I will call him Rod, Rod sat with me on the ski lift, pinched my side and said, are you going to listen to them, or to me, what the f&& is wrong with you, are you trying to please him or me. I reluctanly went all the way to the top, and he simply got off, and started to snowbard himself down to the very top of the slope and left me on my own, my board was going everywhere, I was literally all over the place, somebody tried to help me and I ended up have 35 stitches in my knee, the skin was hanging off and I am left with a really ugly scar on my leg. To this day he tells me that it was because I had a tantrum on the top of the slope. Regardless if I tell him that we were supposed to stay on the nursery slope he calls me mental for panicking.
Once, my brother came to my house, to tell me something about Dad, in confidence. He politely asked to speak to me on my own we were only two minutes. When my brother left, Rod asked me what it was all about, I said, Oh nothing babe, just family stuff and carried on with the kitchen, Rod grabbed me, punched me, pulled my hair. The next day he had put a needle in my lip liner, bleach in my face cream, and bleach in my shampoo...when I discovered it, he laughed and said yes I wanted to rip your lips off because how dare you keep a secret from me, I am fixing up your kitchen.
My younger brother who was a policeman, has recently died in a car accident in London. Rod has showed not one ounce of compassion towards me, when I returned from the funeral back to australia, he said to me, ing policemen, the only good policemen are dead ones (this was after he had just got booked for the upteenth time for speeding), this was less than 2 weeks after the funeral, I just shuddered and looked at him, I feel so brainwashed by this man. I feel so bad about myself for allowing myself to be treated this way. The first question he asked me when my darling brother died was how much money will you get now in inheritance, and he laughed.
There are so so so many more truthful examples I can give. This site is the first time I have ever told anybody. I used to have a fantastic job in england, my own car, I owned by own house, now I live all the way here, no car, no house, he has heaps and heaps of money because he made a lot of money during the Y2K period, I met him in england when we were both workig for a huge company.
Sometimes I feel I am losing my mind...he watches and critisises everything I do, the way I pick up my cat, the way I hold things, everything, then if I speak up he calls me a pyscho, mental .
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