My friend is always asking why we never hang out anymore.. He tells people that I ignore him. Well is this a good reason? Everytime I'm around him or I talk to him he always brings up one of my flaws. He always makes fun of me about it and jokes about it. All my life I was teased about this yet he still continues to talk about it. I know that he knows it bothers me but yet he still does it. When I'm around him he makes me out to be an idiot and slower then him. Is this a real reason to stop hanging around this friend? Other then this, he is a very great friend and fun to hang around. But this is really bothering me and makes me feel unattractive and like crap.
Yes that is a very good reason not to want to hang around someone. Especially since it has been pointed out just how much it annoys you. No one should be allowed to bring you down like that and undermine your confidence. Move on and seek out friends who are more positive and helpful.
I had a friend like that for 18 years. I used to tell myself that all that time counted for something, that loyalty took some odd precedence over his often uncontrolled behavior. But in the end, I realize I really am better off without him, and that he was never really all that much of a true friend.
Essentially your friend is very insecure within himself, and as long as you stick unconditionally by him through such times, he will never really learn to help himself. Perhaps you don't necessarily have to part from him immediately or completely if he seems willing to modify his behavior appreciably with some fairly substantial time apart -- but if he continues on in the way he has, it is not at all healthy for either of you. You can do far better.
Have compassion for him, but don't ever let him bring you down. Everyone deserves a chance, but it seems you have given him a great deal of that already.
Good luck. Take care.
He doesn't sound like anyone I would call MY friend. Throughout your life you will call a lot of people your friends and eventually you will come across those people that don't deserve your time. You can still be nice to him, but just tell him that you don't think friends should treat each other that way. You will never have to question a good friend's actions.
My friend is always asking why we never hang out anymore.. He tells people that I ignore him. Well is this a good reason? Everytime I'm around him or I talk to him he always brings up one of my flaws. He always makes dun of me about it and jokes about it. All my life I was teased about this yet he still continues to talk about it. I know that he knows it bothers me but yet he still does it. When I'm around him he makes me out to be an idiot and slower then him. Is this a real reason to stop hanging around this friend? Other then this, he is a very great friend and fun to hang around. But this is really bothering me and makes me feel unattractive and like crap.
Tell your friend how you feel, and ask him not to treat you that way. Tell him it hurts your feelings if it does. Do not retaliate and say mean things to him, it wont make you any better of a person. If it makes you feel better to ignore him for awhile, after you tell him atleast he will know why you are doing it. Dont worry about what he is telling other people about the reasons you are hanging out with him.
This sounds like a toxic person for you. I have always been advised to stay away from people who make me feel bad. I think this is good advice. I don't feel this is a friend, as friends make us feel good about ourselves.
You sound like a very perceptive person and I feel you deserve much better friends.
Thanks guys... I felt like maybe it was just me and maybe I should laugh with him about it, even though it really makes me feel bad. He wasn't like this when we first met, then eventually this became a habit. I don't have that many friends either.
Thanks guys... I felt like maybe it was just me and maybe I should laugh with him about it, even though it really makes me feel bad. He wasn't like this when we first met, then eventually this became a habit. I don't have that many friends either.
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